# Informal interview/Do I need to offer to buy lunch? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 10, 2011, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/informal-interview-do-i-need-to-offer-to-buy-lunch/584974 "2011-06-10T13:56:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 6\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Markxxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5daacb/32.png) [@Markxxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Markxxx)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2011, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/informal-interview-do-i-need-to-offer-to-buy-lunch/584974/21 "2011-06-10T23:15:50Z")
I concur never offer anything “gift-wise” for any sort of an interview. DO and remember this, thank him via email or small card for the dinner and the “opportunity to discuss” the advancement, as soon as possible. As for ordering booze, one thing I learned is that it is off putting to some people NOT to have wine. I don’t drink period. And I had evening dinner interviews where I declined wine and such. But I have come to find out many people will not drink if you don’t. OR worse they think if you say, “I don’t drink,” that the reason is you’re an ex-alcoholic. So liquor can be tricky. ---
**Author:** ![Agent\_Foxtrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9fc29f/32.png) [@Agent\_Foxtrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Agent_Foxtrot)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2011, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/informal-interview-do-i-need-to-offer-to-buy-lunch/584974/22 "2011-06-10T23:31:49Z")
It couldn’t have gone better. The “informal interview”, which was supposed to be a simple Q&A session, turned into a full-on interview early on. At the end of lunch, they flat-out told me they were recommending me for the position. 🙂 This would be a serious promotion for me. Not counting on anything until the salary is negotiated and the offer letter signed, but everything’s looking very, very good. Oh, and I didn’t reach for my wallet. They didn’t give me a chance to. 🙂 Please wait… Loading new tax bracket… ---
**Author:** ![YaraMateo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/58f4c7/32.png) [@YaraMateo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YaraMateo)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2011, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/informal-interview-do-i-need-to-offer-to-buy-lunch/584974/23 "2011-06-10T23:36:41Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > Not only is it odd, it is offputting. It shows a lack of social skills, like you don’t know your place. > > Senior person at the table always pays. Classic case of passive agressive one upmanship that will lose you the job. Beside, how much do you need it if you can afford to pay for everyone’s lunch? :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![China\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/779978/32.png) [@China\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/China_Guy)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2011, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/informal-interview-do-i-need-to-offer-to-buy-lunch/584974/24 "2011-06-11T04:22:53Z")
Most companies have policies where the senior person at the table picks up the check. It’s not passive aggressiveness but a decent policy that avoids the senior person knowingly or unknowingly pressuring a more junior person over the bill. ---
**Author:** ![Rand\_Rover](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/db5fbb/32.png) [@Rand\_Rover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rand_Rover)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2011, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/informal-interview-do-i-need-to-offer-to-buy-lunch/584974/25 "2011-06-11T04:31:00Z")
> [@Agent\_Foxtrot](#): > > It couldn’t have gone better. > > The “informal interview”, which was supposed to be a simple Q&A session, turned into a full-on interview early on. At the end of lunch, they flat-out told me they were recommending me for the position. 🙂 This would be a serious promotion for me. > > Not counting on anything until the salary is negotiated and the offer letter signed, but everything’s looking very, very good. > > Oh, and I didn’t reach for my wallet. They didn’t give me a chance to. 🙂 > > Please wait… Loading new tax bracket… Congrats man. > [@YaraMateo](#): > > Classic case of passive agressive one upmanship that will lose you the job. Beside, how much do you need it if you can afford to pay for everyone’s lunch? :dubious: > [@China\_Guy](#): > > Most companies have policies where the senior person at the table picks up the check. It’s not passive aggressiveness but a decent policy that avoids the senior person knowingly or unknowingly pressuring a more junior person over the bill. I think YaraMateo is in agreement with msmith and you and me and everyone else. ---
**Author:** ![Becky2844](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Becky2844](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Becky2844)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2011, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/informal-interview-do-i-need-to-offer-to-buy-lunch/584974/26 "2011-06-11T05:18:59Z")
No. Don’t even offer to pay. This may be informal but it’s still an interview. If you are being interviewED, they pay. If you are conducting the interview, you pay. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/informal-interview-do-i-need-to-offer-to-buy-lunch/584974.md?page=1)