# Interesting Signs.. **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 6, 2000, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591 "2000-06-06T20:25:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![kayT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayt/32/3633_2.png) [@kayT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayT)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2000, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591/41 "2000-06-09T15:15:31Z")
Sign at an intersection, directly below a traffic signal, “No Stopping Any Time.” But officer… Kentucky Fried Chicken store has been completely torn down. In the middle of the lot is a pile of dirt. A KFC sign at the front of the lot says “Store Being Remodeled to Serve You Better.” Yeah. ---
**Author:** ![jayron\_32](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/41988e/32.png) [@jayron\_32](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayron_32)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2000, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591/42 "2000-06-09T15:28:51Z")
There is a town south of Chicago called Beecher. Apparently (and this is hearsay, as I’ve never seen it, but I have heard several sources who supposedly have) there is a machine shop there named “Beecher Tool and Die” Still, my favorite sign of all time is the sign which can be seen at some borders of Maryland, though specifically at the Maryland/Delaware border along Elkton Rd (DE-2, MD-279) that reads “Welcome to Maryland – Please Drive Gently” It always causes me a little chuckle, and I always gingerly hold the steering wheel with two fingers, and say to my passenger “Look, I’m driving gently” Just when you thought the people who write chinese restaurant menus have no other jobs… ---
**Author:** ![Odieman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a87d85/32.png) [@Odieman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odieman)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2000, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591/43 "2000-06-09T17:47:15Z")
In Saskatchewan there is a town called Eybrow and they have a service station called Eybrow Garage. I always have a mental image of someones 'brow being put on the hoist and getting a lube job. At a Wendy’s in Minot ND 20 years ago they had a sign that said “At Wendy’s we can make it 99 different ways”. Keith ---
**Author:** ![Vanix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/7ab992/32.png) [@Vanix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vanix)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2000, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591/44 "2000-06-09T20:08:23Z")
In Montgomery, Alabama there is a park with a large pond upon whose banks one can find a sign reading: **BEWARE OF SWANS** ---
**Author:** ![Shaky\_Jake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/90db22/32.png) [@Shaky\_Jake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shaky_Jake)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2000, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591/45 "2000-06-09T20:29:17Z")
Outside Boston is a short stretch of highway that is both I-95 and (state) Route 128. You pass a sign that reads: I-95 North 128 South It always struck me as funny. Down the road from my house in Durham, NC is a place that sells headstones, as in cemetary. The sign reads: Before you go Call Joe Shaky Jake ---
**Author:** ![JimmyNipples](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/eb9ed0/32.png) [@JimmyNipples](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JimmyNipples)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2000, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591/46 "2000-06-14T14:35:16Z")
In Salmon Arm BC Canada, where I live, there is a windshield repair shop called…CrackMaster Beautiful ---
**Author:** ![Spiny\_Norman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9de0a6/32.png) [@Spiny\_Norman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiny_Norman)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2000, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591/47 "2000-06-14T15:04:39Z")
The French habit of putting up a sign on exit roads saying “Toutes directions” (i.e., “All directions”) is always good for a chuckle. OTOH, I actually prefer their careful habit when there are several possibilities: One sign will point to, say, Lyon, and the other will be labelled “Autres directions” (you guessed it: “Other directions”). Sure, if you DON’T want to go to Lyon, you’ll know where to go. The logic is unassailable, and yet… ---
**Author:** ![jayron\_32](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/41988e/32.png) [@jayron\_32](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayron_32)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2000, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591/48 "2000-06-14T15:20:06Z")
> [@](#): > > Outside Boston is a short stretch of highway that is both I-95 and (state) Route 128. You pass a sign > that reads: > > ``` > I-95 North > 128 South > > ``` Speaking as an ex-patriate New Englander and life-long roadgeek: Actually, it’s I-93 North/128 South… I-95 South is 128 South. IIRC, western Virginia has I-81 South/I-77 North. In both of these cases (I-93/MA-128 and I-81/I-77) the road pretty much goes due east-west. ---
**Author:** ![Altair\_8800](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/4491bb/32.png) [@Altair\_8800](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Altair_8800)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2000, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591/49 "2000-06-29T22:22:00Z")
I live in the rural South, and during the summer it’s common to see the locals setting up their own produce stands and placing “billboards” (painted plywood) by the side of the road to advertise their goods. I saw this one recently on Highway 117: Bodacious Sweet Corn For Sale ==\> ---
**Author:** ![panamajack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/47e85d/32.png) [@panamajack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panamajack)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2000, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591/50 "2000-06-29T23:16:27Z")
Kind of funny sign I saw recently : There’s a church nearby that puts up a sign with (presumably) the preacher for that week and the topic of the sermon. A few weeks back I saw on the sign : Pastor Seeley Mankind’s Greatest Mistake But then, a few weeks later : Pastor Seeley God’s Gift to Man ---
**Author:** ![handy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5a626/32.png) [@handy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handy)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2000, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591/51 "2000-06-29T23:20:56Z")
SLOW CHILDREN PLAYING. But we have another one thats been in a window here for years, POLICE: CLOSE DOOR TO SHUT OFF ALARM. ---
**Author:** ![friedo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@friedo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/friedo)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2000, 5:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591/52 "2000-06-30T05:45:27Z")
Above a urinal in a bar: Express lane: Three beers or less ---
**Author:** ![Scarlett67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scarlett67/32/7387_2.png) [@Scarlett67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarlett67)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2000, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591/53 "2000-07-12T23:39:49Z")
When my locally-owned bank relocated to a new building, they found a bronze plaque in the basement of the old building. It’s now prominently displayed in the new lobby: THIS BANK IS EQUIPPED WITH STEEL GUN TURRETS, ARMORED SHIELDS, AND GAS BOMBS ANYONE ATTEMPTING TO ROB THIS BANK WILL BE CAPTURED I love going to a bank with a sense of humor. ---
**Author:** ![Montfort](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Montfort](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Montfort)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2000, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591/54 "2000-07-13T00:04:39Z")
Up along I-95 in northeast Maryland, there’s a sign near Aberdeen for the **Decoy Museum.** I’ve always wondered where the _real_ museum was, and why they needed to have a fake one to protect it. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Tof](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@The\_Tof](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Tof)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2000, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591/55 "2000-07-13T01:12:48Z")
I have a picture of this somewhere… but can’t find it. I was passing by a KFC which read on their billboard outside… “Extra Tasty Crispy Help Wanted.” And (gosh I hope I can do justice to this sign… It kills me every time I see it.)… In Portland, there is a spot just at an I5 onramp where there is a big break in the sidewalk… Right before it is a big yellow sign with a little stick man flipping over his bicycle… and sign that says simply… “CRACK” screeme ---
**Author:** ![Gunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gunslinger)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2000, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591/56 "2000-07-13T04:55:08Z")
In South Louisiana (near Avery Island, home of Tabasco sauce) there were signs along the side of a road proclaiming: **NO DUMPING BROKEN CONCRETE** …completely surrounded by chunks of concrete. ---
**Author:** ![Flutterby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Flutterby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flutterby)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2000, 5:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591/57 "2000-07-13T05:15:51Z")
_laughs reading these_ These are funny! Thanks for replying people! ---
**Author:** ![\_Hoops](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/_/ecae2f/32.png) [@\_Hoops](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/_Hoops)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2000, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591/58 "2000-07-13T21:22:59Z")
In Omaha, Nebraska (and probably lots of other places too) there are a few places where the city planners have made a little turn off to the right side of the road that circles back to cross the main street. The result is that they have street signs that read: “Go Right to Turn Left” ---
**Author:** ![Gunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gunslinger)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2000, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591/59 "2000-07-14T03:49:25Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Gunslinger \* > \*\*In South Louisiana (near Avery Island, home of Tabasco sauce) there were signs along the side of a road proclaiming: **NO DUMPING BROKEN CONCRETE** …completely surrounded by chunks of concrete. \*\* My mom just got back from S. LA. She drove down that same road, and _saw neither the signs nor the concrete_. And she was looking for it, so she could take a picture of it. The first time was about 3 years ago, BTW. ---
**Author:** ![BrothaTJ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/d07c76/32.png) [@BrothaTJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrothaTJ)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2000, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591/60 "2000-07-14T05:30:09Z")
Oh my god I’ve never laughed this hard in my life…thanks to all of you for adding your signs! The only funny one I can think of is the aforementioned “Slow children playing” signs. Every time we pass them, my friends and I say “Gee that’s a shame” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-signs/21591.md?page=4)