# Interesting ways to kill yourself. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 12, 2004, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792 "2004-07-12T22:42:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Larry\_Griffin-Kentzel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_griffin-kentzel/32/14787_2.png) [@Larry\_Griffin-Kentzel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Griffin-Kentzel)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2004, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792/21 "2004-07-13T03:35:20Z")
Considering that suicide is illegal in the country, this thread is bit too close to discussing how to commit a crime, for comfort. This is closed. **Cajun Man** for the SDMB ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Griffin-Kentzel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_griffin-kentzel/32/14787_2.png) [@Larry\_Griffin-Kentzel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Griffin-Kentzel)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2004, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792/22 "2004-07-13T12:45:09Z")
My apologies . . . apparently suicide is not illegal in the United States. [**Is suicide against the law?**](http://www.straightdope.com/columns/040326.html) **Cajun Man** for the SDMB ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2004, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792/23 "2004-07-13T13:13:15Z")
> [@bughunter](#): > > Two words. Ten syllables: > > Autoerotic asphyxiation. > > Hey, you said _interesting_, not _likely_. I used to work for a life insurance company, and we had a couple of guys buy the farm in this manner. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2004, 1:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792/24 "2004-07-13T13:15:18Z")
Attempt to hijack any airplane. The other passengers plummeting you to death will make every news story for weeks. ---
**Author:** ![TwoTrouts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a9adbd/32.png) [@TwoTrouts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwoTrouts)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2004, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792/25 "2004-07-13T14:02:29Z")
For me, it is the disposition of the body that is interesting. I want my body to be sunk into the mud of the Mississippi Delta to eventually become a fossil. Millions of years from now, that area should be above water as a new land mass, my body entombed into the sedimentary deposits. If I had to go in a spectacular way, nothing beats James Cagney’s exit in _White_ _Heat_. “…Top of the world!!!” BOOM ---
**Author:** ![clayton\_e](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c57346/32.png) [@clayton\_e](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clayton_e)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2004, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792/26 "2004-07-13T14:04:54Z")
Wow… First “closed then reopened” thread I’ve been in… Skydiving. With a nuclear weapon. Poor formerly Soviet nations have nukes they’d probably be willing to part with. ---
**Author:** ![gotpasswords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c57346/32.png) [@gotpasswords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gotpasswords)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2004, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792/27 "2004-07-13T16:46:30Z")
How about going to whatever department at a university or museum that would collect and clean old bones? They use beetles and other insects that eat the flesh off the bones, leaving nice squeaky-clean bones. Climb into the bug box and fall alseep… Won’t be speedy - they bugs eat slowly, and it will hurt when you wake up, but, hey, it’s certainly an \*interesting \* way to do it! ---
**Author:** ![ccwaterback](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/df705f/32.png) [@ccwaterback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ccwaterback)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2004, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792/28 "2004-07-13T21:31:24Z")
I would sit here on my lazy butt eating donuts with my channel changer in my hand. Hey, wait a minute … :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![sciguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e68b1a/32.png) [@sciguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sciguy)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2004, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792/29 "2004-07-13T22:03:18Z")
> [@Sublight](#): > > Go not with a whimper, but with a “Smack! Boingggg! Smack! Boingggg! Smack! Boingggg!..” Curse you for trying to kill me by inducing my lungs to snurk out of my nasal cavaties!!! Hmmm, interesting suicide methods… Launched from a Trebuchet into a live volcano while wearing a Superman costume. Yep, I think that’s my choice. ---
**Author:** ![Abbie\_Carmichael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/49beb7/32.png) [@Abbie\_Carmichael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Abbie_Carmichael)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2004, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792/30 "2004-07-13T22:48:34Z")
I’ve told this story before, I think. Eons ago on my granny’s side of the family, she had this cousin who was married to this crazy woman. Anyhow she was nagging him one day, and so he locked himself in the bedroom to get away from her. She got all pissed off and went into the kitchen and baked a pecan pie, sat down at the table and ate it. She was a diabetic, y’see. Yes. Death by pie. Weebl would be proud. ---
**Author:** ![Kaotic\_Newtral](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/71e660/32.png) [@Kaotic\_Newtral](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kaotic_Newtral)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2004, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792/31 "2004-07-13T23:36:40Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > Attempt to hijack any airplane. The other passengers **plummeting** you to death will make every news story for weeks. Bolding mine. Annie, no disrespect meant here at all. I think this is either the most amazing turn of words I’ve ever read! 🙂 I just know you meant pummeling! Didn’t ya…didn’t ya? ---
**Author:** ![Marconi\_Schmeese](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ea666f/32.png) [@Marconi\_Schmeese](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marconi_Schmeese)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2004, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792/32 "2004-07-13T23:49:03Z")
I’ve always thought that if it was my time to go I would get extremely drunk and go hang out in the snow in the middle of the night. It would be relatively painless and would look like an accident. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2004, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792/33 "2004-07-14T00:07:24Z")
> [@bughunter](#): > > Autoerotic asphyxiation. Hey, if it’s good enough for Mulder… For impossible means, I’d like to land a spaceship on Venus and have it suddenly disappear leaving my unprotected body on the surface. I wonder if I’d have time to say “Ta-da!” before being crushed and vaporized? Or, a method from Bobcat Goldthwait: Break into the house of the president of the NRA, take one of his guns, put it in my mouth, and, right before pulling the trigger, say, “Explain this!”. ---
**Author:** ![Carm6773](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/2bfe46/32.png) [@Carm6773](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carm6773)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2004, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792/34 "2004-07-14T05:23:04Z")
> [@bughunter](#): > > Two words. Ten syllables: > > Autoerotic asphyxiation. Sorry, has to be said… BAND NAME!!! ---
**Author:** ![TJdude825](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dec6dc/32.png) [@TJdude825](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TJdude825)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2004, 7:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792/35 "2004-07-14T07:25:41Z")
I think I’d commit some kind of shameful act, then commit some sort of creative suicide, involving fire, rather than facing a life sentence. I like fire. Then when I got to heaven\* I’d discover that what I’d done had actually been legalized, and ask to be sent back to earth for a few more years. 😉😃 \*I don’t really believe in heaven, but I needed to set up the joke. ---
**Author:** ![Cicero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cicero/32/3594_2.png) [@Cicero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cicero)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2004, 10:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792/36 "2004-07-14T10:37:30Z")
> [@Muad'Dib](#): > > Say, for whatever reason, you have decided that it is time to die. What would be your ideal way to do it? Forget any crap about resources or money, you want to die and you wanna may it cool, interesting or memorable what would you do? > > I was watching CNN the other day and they were talking about that company that will shoot your cremated remains into space for a few thousand dollars. That is how I would like to go, in a one way ticket to outer space. I imagine I would have to actually kill myself once up there, or maybe burn-up on reentry, or even by shooting out into the dead of space without a suit. That would be a very awesome way to check out, suicide by space. I don’t quite follow this. If they are shooting your remains into space, you’ve already cashed in your chips. ---
**Author:** ![Go\_You\_Big\_Red\_Fire\_Engine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/eada6e/32.png) [@Go\_You\_Big\_Red\_Fire\_Engine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Go_You_Big_Red_Fire_Engine)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2004, 11:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792/37 "2004-07-14T11:48:16Z")
> [@Wesley Clark](#): > > Failing that, i think i’d like to die in the forest. Deep in the forest, several miles in. Near a creek preferably. How i’d die, i don’t know. Maybe just a simple gun to the head type of death. If someone commits suicide in the forest, and no-one’s around to hear it, do they make a sound? To the OP: [like this](http://bash.org/?87725) Doing something so ridiculously dumb it makes the [Darwin Awards](http://www.darwinawards.com/). ---
**Author:** ![Go\_You\_Big\_Red\_Fire\_Engine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/eada6e/32.png) [@Go\_You\_Big\_Red\_Fire\_Engine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Go_You_Big_Red_Fire_Engine)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2004, 11:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792/38 "2004-07-14T11:58:24Z")
Oh Oh Oh… or like that guy in Jonathan Creek who killed the judge who put him in jail. > [@http://jonathancreek.net; Season 1; Jack In The Box](#): > > When Jack’s new wife (Kirsten) comes home and finds him missing, she calls in the police. They discover Jack’s body in an old disused nuclear bunker which has been locked from the inside. It appears to be suicide, Jack having shot himself in the head. However as Jack had crippling arthritis and couldn’t un-peel a banana let alone shoot himself, Kirsten is convinced it was murder. But how could a murderer have gotten out of the room…? Several days before the murder, Rokesmith came down to the bunker and began to systematically dismantle the back brick wall. He then re-build’s it a few inches in from the back block of concrete, leaving an opening that he can get through. He then returns with Jack, kills him, and places the gun in Jack’s hand to make it look like suicide. He then swallows some pills and before they can take effect, he seals himself in by finishing rebuilding the brick wall. Pure Genius. ---
**Author:** ![Greenback](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/2bfe46/32.png) [@Greenback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greenback)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2004, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792/39 "2004-07-14T14:28:19Z")
For me it would have to be self-mummification. I could go to a weight loss clinic, weigh in at 225, and when they ask me what my target is I could say that I’d like to get down to 40 pounds. When people would comment that I had lost weight I could that it’s a work in progress. ---
**Author:** ![Tentacle\_Monster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ba9def/32.png) [@Tentacle\_Monster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tentacle_Monster)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2004, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792/40 "2004-07-14T16:38:50Z")
Bungee jumping; using your intestines as the cord. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/interesting-ways-to-kill-yourself/254792.md?page=3)