# Introducing Urban Legend Barbie! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 20, 2003, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/introducing-urban-legend-barbie/169739 "2003-04-20T00:52:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![DAVEW0071](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e19b73/32.png) [@DAVEW0071](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DAVEW0071)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2003, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/introducing-urban-legend-barbie/169739/1 "2003-04-20T00:52:11Z")
Barbie’s[sup]TM[/sup] into Urban Legends! Missing Kidney Barbie[sup]TM[/sup] comes with crude stitches on her lower back and a bathtub filled with ice. You can make her wake up after the Mysterious Frat Boy[sup]TM[/sup] slips her a mickey and have her discover the note telling her to get to the emergency room right away! Hook-man Barbie[sup]TM[/sup] just misses getting maimed by an escaped looney! Drive her through the woods and back home where she discovers the hook attached to the car door handle! [sub]Car sold separately.[/sub] Choking Doberman Barbie[sup]TM[/sup] comes with ten fingers and a veterinarian’s examining room. Good doggie! [sub]CAUTION: Contains small pieces. May present a choking hazard for small children and dobermans.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Already\_in\_Use](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@Already\_in\_Use](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Already_in_Use)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2003, 10:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/introducing-urban-legend-barbie/169739/2 "2003-04-20T10:04:01Z")
I want Emergency Room Frozen Hot Dog Removal Barbie[sup]TM[/sup]! ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2003, 10:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/introducing-urban-legend-barbie/169739/3 "2003-04-20T10:12:57Z")
Oooh, does she come with Gerbil Stuffing Ken, or is he sold seperately? Maybe they could add Cheerleader Slut Skipper, complete with stomach pump and quart of semen, and sell them all together as the Triage Trio. ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2003, 12:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/introducing-urban-legend-barbie/169739/4 "2003-04-20T12:11:18Z")
I want an Earwig Barbie, with a removable half-eaten brain! ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2003, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/introducing-urban-legend-barbie/169739/5 "2003-04-20T12:45:22Z")
Is there one that comes with a thick winter jacket, a beanie, and a pair of shades? ---
**Author:** ![Maxxxie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f14d63/32.png) [@Maxxxie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maxxxie)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2003, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/introducing-urban-legend-barbie/169739/6 "2003-04-20T14:06:14Z")
Oooo oooo ooooo!!! Dreadlock Barbie, complete with resident nest of spiders!!! ---
**Author:** ![Marine\_One](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/marine_one/32/3461_2.png) [@Marine\_One](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marine_One)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2003, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/introducing-urban-legend-barbie/169739/7 "2003-04-20T15:44:56Z")
Information Minister Barbie? I mean, doesn’t she already have a beret? ---
**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2003, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/introducing-urban-legend-barbie/169739/8 "2003-04-20T16:04:49Z")
Ooh, ooh! I want Lobster Fun Barbi[sup]TM[/sup]! [sub](if you don’t knoiw, don’t ask, just go to [snopes](http://www.snopes.com) to find out)[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Incubus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c68b51/32.png) [@Incubus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Incubus)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2003, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/introducing-urban-legend-barbie/169739/9 "2003-04-20T17:00:50Z")
How about poolwater-impregnated Barbie? comes with aboveground pool, and pervert neighbor. Put Barbie in the pool after the pervert’s done his thing, and she comes out pregnant! Its the miracle of life! ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2003, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/introducing-urban-legend-barbie/169739/10 "2003-04-20T17:40:10Z")
Clara Bow Barbie, and USC Football Player Ken (collect all 12!) ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2003, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/introducing-urban-legend-barbie/169739/11 "2003-04-20T19:04:31Z")
Mexican Pet Barbie, with Neck-Breaking Action! ---
**Author:** ![Terminus\_Est](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terminus_est/32/3087_2.png) [@Terminus\_Est](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terminus_Est)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2003, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/introducing-urban-legend-barbie/169739/12 "2003-04-20T19:05:31Z")
Hook-man Barbie[sup]TM[/sup]: I thought that this came with DORRANCE 5X STAINLESS-STEEL HOOKS! ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2003, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/introducing-urban-legend-barbie/169739/13 "2003-04-20T19:29:48Z")
[Smithsonian Fossilized Barbie](http://www.snopes.com/humor/letters/smithson.htm) Barbie ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2003, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/introducing-urban-legend-barbie/169739/14 "2003-04-20T19:32:37Z")
Nigerian Widow Barbie - limited edition - for a mere $50,000 you get a doll worth millions! ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2003, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/introducing-urban-legend-barbie/169739/15 "2003-04-20T19:44:08Z")
Microwave Poodle Barbie: Comes with microwave and re-usable exploding poodle. Fake Virus Barbie: Pull the string on her back, and she issues dire warnings about non-exsistant computer viruses. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/introducing-urban-legend-barbie/169739/16 "2003-04-21T13:41:56Z")
Gotta have [Riding-the-Broom](http://www.snopes.com/college/sex/broom.php) Barbie. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![NurseCarmen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5daacb/32.png) [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/introducing-urban-legend-barbie/169739/17 "2003-04-21T21:20:11Z")
Gum in the stomach Barbie: Gum inexplicably stays in her stomach for 7 years! Gang Initiation Barbie: Actually, it’s just Malibu Barbie’s jeep with it’s headlights smashed out, and an Uzi on the passenger seat. ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/introducing-urban-legend-barbie/169739/18 "2003-04-21T22:00:19Z")
**Inappropriate Public Displays of Affection Barbie** 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2003, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/introducing-urban-legend-barbie/169739/19 "2003-04-22T00:25:28Z")
**Diving Barbie[sup]TM[/sup]**, complete with forrest tree and fire fighter airplane! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2003, 12:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/introducing-urban-legend-barbie/169739/20 "2003-04-22T00:27:59Z")
Astronaut Barbie can see the Great Wall of China all the way from the moon. _Average_ Barbie eats eight spiders per year in her sleep, but what can you expect of someone who only uses 10% of their brain? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/introducing-urban-legend-barbie/169739.md?page=2)