# Invasion of the Penis Snatchers

**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invasion-of-the-penis-snatchers/206803
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [October 11, 2003, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invasion-of-the-penis-snatchers/206803 "2003-10-11T04:39:34Z")
**Posts on this page:** 18
**Page:** 1

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### Author: ![Doomtrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Doomtrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doomtrain)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2003, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invasion-of-the-penis-snatchers/206803/1 "2003-10-11T04:39:34Z")

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From scenic [West Africa](http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=573&ncid=757&e=1&u=/nm/20031010/od_nm/odd_gambia_penis_dc):

> [@](#):
>
> Reports of penis snatching are not uncommon in West Africa, with purported victims claiming that alleged sorcerers simply touched them to make their genitals shrink or disappear in order to extort cash in the promise of a cure.

“Follow that penis-snatcher!”

Who knew King Missile was singing about a genuine _crisis_?

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### Author: ![misstee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/958977/32.png) [@misstee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/misstee)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2003, 5:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invasion-of-the-penis-snatchers/206803/2 "2003-10-11T05:56:40Z")

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He he he, Ha ha ha…

I like the line “made their genitals shrink”  
Some guys I knew in high school could sure use that story.

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### Author: ![Doomtrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Doomtrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doomtrain)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2003, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invasion-of-the-penis-snatchers/206803/3 "2003-10-11T06:32:18Z")

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“Naw, baby, there was this sorcerer…”

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### Author: ![misstee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/958977/32.png) [@misstee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/misstee)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2003, 6:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invasion-of-the-penis-snatchers/206803/4 "2003-10-11T06:45:49Z")

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“… but you can fix it, all you have to do is kiss it better.”

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### Author: ![lurksfromwork](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@lurksfromwork](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lurksfromwork)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2003, 9:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invasion-of-the-penis-snatchers/206803/5 "2003-10-11T09:04:46Z")

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I have your penises, I’ll give them back if you give me all your wimmen!!

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### Author: ![SpectBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a87d85/32.png) [@SpectBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpectBrain)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2003, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invasion-of-the-penis-snatchers/206803/6 "2003-10-11T14:19:03Z")

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All your penis belong to us.

Someone had to do it! 😃

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### Author: ![Fretful\_Porpentine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fretful_porpentine/32/2873_2.png) [@Fretful\_Porpentine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fretful_Porpentine)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2003, 2:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invasion-of-the-penis-snatchers/206803/7 "2003-10-11T14:34:55Z")

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Apparently there was an epidemic of penis-snatching in medieval Europe as well. The witch-hunting manual _Malleus Maleficarum_ considers, among other interesting questions, “Whether Witches may work some Presdigitatory Illusion so that the Male Organ appears to be entirely removed and separate from the Body.” Comfortingly, it appears that this was often the victim’s own fault:

> [@](#):
>
> An incidental question, with other difficulties, follows. Peter’s member has been taken of, and he does not know whether it was by witchcraft or in some othe way by the devil’s power, with the permission of God. Are there any ways of determining or distinguishing between these? It can be answered as follows: First, that those to whom such things most commonly happen are adulterers or fornicators. For when they fail to respond to the demand of their mistress, or if they wish to desert them and attach themselves to other women, then their mistress, out of vengeance, causes such a thing to happen, or through some other power causes their members to be taken off.

For some reason that “those to whom such things most commonly happen” always cracks me up – were there really so many cases they could generalize? :eek:

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### Author: ![quiltguy154](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/ad7895/32.png) [@quiltguy154](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/quiltguy154)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2003, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invasion-of-the-penis-snatchers/206803/8 "2003-10-11T14:40:41Z")

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“I can fix it, but it’s gotta’ go back to the shop.”

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### Author: ![Sock\_Munkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@Sock\_Munkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sock_Munkey)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2003, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invasion-of-the-penis-snatchers/206803/9 "2003-10-11T17:19:05Z")

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Your HMO doesn’t cover this…

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### Author: ![Doomtrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Doomtrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doomtrain)
#### Post date: [October 11, 2003, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invasion-of-the-penis-snatchers/206803/10 "2003-10-11T18:31:57Z")

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“Penis-Snatching in Medieval Europe” sounds like a Master’s Thesis. Or an art rock band.

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### Author: ![Johanna](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johanna/32/8318_2.png) [@Johanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johanna)
#### Post date: [October 12, 2003, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invasion-of-the-penis-snatchers/206803/11 "2003-10-12T00:14:32Z")

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The shrinking or retracting penis delusion is also a clinically researched known mental illness that has struck parts of Southeast Asia. This report is the first I’ve seen of it happening in Africa too. SDSTAFF Jill already covered the Asian Penis Shrinkage Scare in [a Straight Dope column](http://www.straightdope.com/mailbag/mjackoff.html).

It has a name: Koro (which seems to be derived from the Malay word _kura_ meaning ‘tortoise’, referring to the act of retracting back into the body). [A Natural History of Penis Panics](http://www.kuro5hin.org/story/2002/9/16/81843/6555). Apparently its incidence in Asia goes back to 300 BC, in the _Yellow Emperor’s Classic of Medicine_.

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### Author: ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)
#### Post date: [October 12, 2003, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invasion-of-the-penis-snatchers/206803/12 "2003-10-12T00:36:53Z")

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Has this been going on long?

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### Author: ![twit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/958977/32.png) [@twit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twit)
#### Post date: [October 12, 2003, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invasion-of-the-penis-snatchers/206803/13 "2003-10-12T00:43:38Z")

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And was Lorena Bobbitt involved??? :eek:

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### Author: ![The\_Man\_With\_The\_Golden\_Gun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dc4da7/32.png) [@The\_Man\_With\_The\_Golden\_Gun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Man_With_The_Golden_Gun)
#### Post date: [October 12, 2003, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invasion-of-the-penis-snatchers/206803/14 "2003-10-12T00:54:12Z")

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Just because someone steals your penis is no reason to go off half-cocked.

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### Author: ![lurksfromwork](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@lurksfromwork](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lurksfromwork)
#### Post date: [October 12, 2003, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invasion-of-the-penis-snatchers/206803/15 "2003-10-12T01:49:56Z")

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“subsequently claiming that their ‘returned’ penis had been replaced but was shrunk, leading them to think it must be a ghost penis or perhaps the wrong one.”

Do you reckon anyone complained about the returned penis being bigger???

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### Author: ![Doomtrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Doomtrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doomtrain)
#### Post date: [October 12, 2003, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invasion-of-the-penis-snatchers/206803/16 "2003-10-12T02:16:20Z")

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A “ghost penis”, eh? So it’s all just ecoplasm?

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### Author: ![Kieras](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/a87d85/32.png) [@Kieras](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kieras)
#### Post date: [October 13, 2003, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invasion-of-the-penis-snatchers/206803/17 "2003-10-13T01:13:55Z")

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Probably just took too many cold showers 😃

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### Author: ![Ringo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/779978/32.png) [@Ringo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ringo)
#### Post date: [October 13, 2003, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invasion-of-the-penis-snatchers/206803/18 "2003-10-13T01:28:32Z")

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The thread title made me think of the alternative movie, _Body of the Snatch Invaders_.
