# Invitation to all child-beaters **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 10, 2008, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345 "2008-10-10T17:01:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pseudotriton_ruber_ruber)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345/41 "2008-10-10T18:29:47Z")
> [@Airman\_Doors\_USAF](#): > > I confirmed nothing of the sort. What I confirmed is that I’ve seen a parent administer a single swat to the bottom of a child behaving badly, which resulted in a call to the cops from some busybody who thought that they knew better than the parent did how to discipline their child. > > If you see someone beating the snot out of their kid, call the cops. But one swat does not constitute a beating unless it’s a busybody zealot like you. So give that sweet little kid I met in Gettysburg a good hard crack for me the next time he acts up. Just do it in the police station in front of witnesses. I’m sure you’ll get away with it. It’s purely a family matter, after all. And I’m so happy that the person who gave that single swat (such a nice , affectionate word) got to sue for false arrest. How could anyone have thought that a single swat would be taken seriously by a responsible officer of the law? I bet that idiot cop who arrested him was sorry he did such a dumb thing, right? ---
**Author:** ![Terrifel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c68b51/32.png) [@Terrifel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terrifel)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345/42 "2008-10-10T18:30:03Z")
Anyone else here feel the urge to go beat a child just because of this thread? Halloween’s just around the corner, isn’t it? They come right to your door! ---
**Author:** ![pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pseudotriton_ruber_ruber)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345/43 "2008-10-10T18:30:49Z")
> [@Scumpup](#): > > No, that’s not unsaying. That’s just offering an excuse for what you said. Everybody would still remember what you said and those whom you’ve angered would likely still be angry. I, for example, will not come in on your side in this thread just because you are a jerk; even though under all your shitty attitude you are right about a few things. I’m just heartbroken. ---
**Author:** ![Bambro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/df705f/32.png) [@Bambro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bambro)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345/44 "2008-10-10T18:32:10Z")
> [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](#): > > Omigawd! I take it back. You’re obviously very mature and well adjusted. > [@](#): > > I’ve adopted an unpleasant tone in a pit thread? Don’t claim to want honest conversation on a topic when you know that your uncivil tone wouldn’t allow that to happen. > [@](#): > > Maybe I’ll beat my own head against the brick wall here to teach myself a lesson. Whatever helps you sleep at night. ---
**Author:** ![mlees](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba8739/32.png) [@mlees](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mlees)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345/45 "2008-10-10T18:32:54Z")
Also, the “privacy” requirement is adhered to even in the adult world. Consider: An Employer needs to “discipline” an employee, who has been showing up to work exhibiting poor personal hygene, and rudeness to customers. This discipline (a “talking to” and possibly paper documentation) is expected to be conducted in private, and not in view of the other employees. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345/46 "2008-10-10T18:34:16Z")
Whether you’re heartbroken is neither here nor there. I’d guess, though, that if you won’t modify a deliberately offensive tone\_the exact same tone you used outside the Pit in Great Debates BTW\_you are less interested in advancing your side of the debate than you are in just provoking anger; hence you’re a jerk. ---
**Author:** ![pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pseudotriton_ruber_ruber)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345/47 "2008-10-10T18:34:32Z")
> [@Revenant\_Threshold](#): > > indeed opening it in the Pit. I think the Mods are very glad I opened this thread in the Pit (as opposed to any other venue. They’d probably be happiest of all if I hadn’t opened it anywhere at all.) ---
**Author:** ![Euthanasiast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Euthanasiast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euthanasiast)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345/48 "2008-10-10T18:34:36Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > He might as well have asked us when we stopped beating our wives. Now wait just a God damned minute… Are you tellin’ me that I have to stop beating my wife too? ---
**Author:** ![Snarky\_Kong](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a183cd/32.png) [@Snarky\_Kong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snarky_Kong)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345/49 "2008-10-10T18:35:48Z")
> [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](#): > > Sure you can. If I were to announce that I was off my meds today, and begged everyone’s forgiveness for wasting their time with all this silly child-abuse nonsense, and (to demonstrate my sincerity) offered a hardbound copy of my book “How to beat your child senseless and get away with it” to any Doper who requested a copy, and autograph it for you, and you thought it was a beautiful statement expressing one of your most revered legal principles and you believed me perfectly sincere in my apology, I think you’d call that unsaying what I’ve said here today. And anybody could announce that they were off their meds, beg for forgiveness, say they’d never spank again, and give out hugs all around. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345/50 "2008-10-10T18:35:48Z")
> [@Frylock](#): > > I don’t advocate spanking. But once, my kid–3 years old–was hitting me while I was bringing him to his time-out chair and… well… I hit him back. Just a slap on the front of the leg–enough, I think, to sting but not even enough to redden the skin or anything like that. > > It was mostly reflex and a lack of ability to think quickly enough on my own part.\* I can’t pretend it was a thought-out parenting strategy or anything like that. Not that dogs are like people, but a lot of people do this with puppies. In fact, dogs do this with their own kids–give them little nips when they bite too hard or get annoying. A teeny slap so that the kid (who’s not terribly verbal at this point) will get the message that hitting hurts so don’t do it doesn’t seem so terrible. I think when they get to the point where they can associate doing something bad with a more abstract punishment or when they can grok a lecture, then physical punishment seems wrong. ---
**Author:** ![CaerieD](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@CaerieD](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CaerieD)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345/51 "2008-10-10T18:36:05Z")
> [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](#): > > No, my point is that words hurt. But if they are wrongly adminstered, they can always be taken back, and sincerely apologized for. Not so with beatings—no matter what, a parent can’t even take a beating back. As others have said: No, you cannot “take words back.” You can apologize for them, but the pain they caused still happened. Same as with a spanking. There were many times during an argument with my mother when she’d chastise me for something I had done that I was so upset at being confronted I actually wished, fervently, that she’d just spank me and be done with it, rather than _talking_ to me. ---
**Author:** ![Yeticus\_Rex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/a698b9/32.png) [@Yeticus\_Rex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yeticus_Rex)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345/52 "2008-10-10T18:36:18Z")
Is bare bottom spanking of my then 38 year-old wife pretending to be a naughty 16 year-old catholic school girl count? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Revenant\_Threshold](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f1d935/32.png) [@Revenant\_Threshold](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revenant_Threshold)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345/53 "2008-10-10T18:37:51Z")
> [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](#): > > I think the Mods are very glad I opened this thread in the Pit (as opposed to any other venue. They’d probably be happiest of all if I hadn’t opened it anywhere at all.) Why? I mean, generally people who say they’d like a serious open-minded discussion post their thread in GD, or perhaps IMHO. They would seem to be the place for it. ---
**Author:** ![Algher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Algher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Algher)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345/54 "2008-10-10T18:38:04Z")
> [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](#): > > Sure you can. If I were to announce that I was off my meds today, and begged everyone’s forgiveness for wasting their time with all this silly child-abuse nonsense, and (to demonstrate my sincerity) offered a hardbound copy of my book “How to beat your child senseless and get away with it” to any Doper who requested a copy, and autograph it for you, and you thought it was a beautiful statement expressing one of your most revered legal principles and you believed me perfectly sincere in my apology, I think you’d call that unsaying what I’ve said here today. Bullshit. You can NOT take away some things that have been said. I remember one spanking from when I was a kid. It means nothing to me, and I know why my father did it. I also know that it fixed my behavior. There have been things said by my parents that they can NEVER take back. I would trade many of those interactions for a fist to the face happily. Negative words are 1,000 x worse than a spanking. Spankings tend to stop around age 5-6. Words just get worse and more personal. You come across as the Corporal Punishment equivalent of a Pro-Lifer. Nothing that is said will penetrate your skull. You also appear to have no concept of the continuum of child punishment. When I PHYSICALLY grab my 5 year old, is that a “beating” in your book? After all, I have not used words, I have grabbed his arm (or sometimes his entire body) and hauled him off in a new direction. In his world his father has interceded in a very physical fashion in a way that he can NOT fight, given our size differences. Based on your statements: I am showing him that might makes right, size matters, physical strength rules, and any other bullshit you might wish to toss out. ---
**Author:** ![ivan\_astikov](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@ivan\_astikov](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivan_astikov)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345/55 "2008-10-10T18:38:21Z")
The only lesson I ever learned from the spankings I received was, “Shit! That hurt. Best not get caught again.”. But, I still preferred a beating, to being grounded. Hence, the more effective punishment was the least violent one. ---
**Author:** ![pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pseudotriton_ruber_ruber)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345/56 "2008-10-10T18:38:34Z")
> [@mlees](#): > > Also, the “privacy” requirement is adhered to even in the adult world. Consider: > > An Employer needs to “discipline” an employee, who has been showing up to work exhibiting poor personal hygene, and rudeness to customers. > > This discipline (a “talking to” and possibly paper documentation) is expected to be conducted in private, and not in view of the other employees. I didn’t say the concept of “privacy” never makes any sense anywhere. I did imply that, with child abuse, it’s complete self-serving bullshit. If a job-related discipline gets revealed in court, it’s fine as long as no law was violated. A child-abuser who gets hauled into court is on very shaky legal ground. ---
**Author:** ![pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pseudotriton_ruber_ruber)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345/57 "2008-10-10T18:41:01Z")
> [@Scumpup](#): > > the exact same tone you used outside the Pit in Great Debates . So report me, shit-for-brains. ---
**Author:** ![pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pseudotriton_ruber_ruber)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345/58 "2008-10-10T18:43:13Z")
> [@CaerieD](#): > > As others have said: No, you cannot “take words back.” You can apologize for them, but the pain they caused still happened. Same as with a spanking. There were many times during an argument with my mother when she’d chastise me for something I had done that I was so upset at being confronted I actually wished, fervently, that she’d just spank me and be done with it, rather than _talking_ to me. You sound like you’re sorry people ever developed the capacity for speech. ---
**Author:** ![Algher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Algher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Algher)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345/59 "2008-10-10T18:43:42Z")
> [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](#): > > So give that sweet little kid I met in Gettysburg a good hard crack for me the next time he acts up. Just do it in the police station in front of witnesses. I’m sure you’ll get away with it. It’s purely a family matter, after all. > > And I’m so happy that the person who gave that single swat (such a nice , affectionate word) got to sue for false arrest. How could anyone have thought that a single swat would be taken seriously by a responsible officer of the law? I bet that idiot cop who arrested him was sorry he did such a dumb thing, right? Where did \*\*Airman \*\*say that an arrest was made? ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345/60 "2008-10-10T18:47:43Z")
> [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](#): > > I think the Mods are very glad I opened this thread in the Pit (as opposed to any other venue. They’d probably be happiest of all if I hadn’t opened it anywhere at all.) Heck, stop being a sanctimonious retard altogether and I’ll probably shit myself from joy. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/invitation-to-all-child-beaters/467345.md?page=4)