# Iraq: Bring on the dolphins! **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [March 26, 2003, 11:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/iraq-bring-on-the-dolphins/164269 "2003-03-26T11:08:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![RandySpears](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/858c86/32.png) [@RandySpears](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandySpears)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2003, 11:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/iraq-bring-on-the-dolphins/164269/1 "2003-03-26T11:08:13Z")
Just when you thought you’ve heard it all… They bring on the dolphins! > [@](#): > > UMM QASR, Iraq (Reuters) - Forget precision bombs, unmanned spy-planes and high-tech weaponry, the U.S. army is about to unveil its most unlikely mine detector – all the way from San Diego, California, the Atlantic Bottle-Nosed Dolphin. > > At the southern Iraqi port of Umm Qasr, secured by U.S and British forces after days of fighting, soldiers made last-minute preparations Tuesday for the imminent arrival of a team of specially trained dolphins to help divers ensure the coastline is free of danger before humanitarian aid shipments can dock. > > U.S. Navy Captain Mike Tillotson told reporters that three or four dolphins would work from Umm Qasr, using their natural sonar abilities to seek out mines or other explosive devices which Iraqi forces may have planted on the seabed. > > “They were flown over on a military animal transporter in fleece-lined slings,” Tillotson said. “We keep them in a certain amount of water. They travel very well.” > > “They will be given restaurant quality food and vitamins, and they will work out of wells which we’ve set up here.” > > Tillotson said the dolphins were trained not to swim up to mines, but to place a marker a small distance away, minimizing any danger to themselves. > > Several mines were discovered last week on the back of ships along the Faw peninsula, but teams of divers searching around Umm Qasr port since Monday have not found any embedded mines. Creativity at a new high, or War-time media at a new low? ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2003, 11:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/iraq-bring-on-the-dolphins/164269/2 "2003-03-26T11:19:37Z")
> [@](#): > > **They will be given restaurant quality food** This has been tried before but they have trouble observing the etiquette; at one dinner I went to, all the dolphins were trying to use the fish knives to butter the bread. On one table, they even insisted on white wine with the beef. They also tip badly. ---
**Author:** ![Fox\_in\_the\_Snow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/82dd89/32.png) [@Fox\_in\_the\_Snow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fox_in_the_Snow)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2003, 11:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/iraq-bring-on-the-dolphins/164269/3 "2003-03-26T11:45:06Z")
This is actually isn’t a new idea. Both The US and the USSR experiented with using dolphins for military purpose during the cold war. I seem to recall that such programs were not very successful. For example I think a Dolphin unit was deployed during the Vietnam conflict but withdrawn after it inflicted accidental injuries on American divers. A quick search turned a couple of interesting links. [www.ukdiving.co.uk/ukdiving/conservation/c698/](http://www.ukdiving.co.uk/ukdiving/conservation/c698/) [http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/middle\_east/670551.stm](http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/middle_east/670551.stm) The second link is espicially interesting to me. Iran have apparently bought the Soviet dolphin program. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2003, 11:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/iraq-bring-on-the-dolphins/164269/4 "2003-03-26T11:45:44Z")
I’m surprised that you’re surprised. [The US Navy has been training dolphins for operational use since 1960.](http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/shows/whales/etc/navycron.html) ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2003, 11:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/iraq-bring-on-the-dolphins/164269/5 "2003-03-26T11:49:50Z")
There’s also been a top-secret project to re-animate dead dolphins, giving them superhuman strength and endurance. Oh, wait, that was Dolph Lundgren. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2003, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/iraq-bring-on-the-dolphins/164269/6 "2003-03-26T13:13:59Z")
“Flippers got a gun…” ---
**Author:** ![RandySpears](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/858c86/32.png) [@RandySpears](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandySpears)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2003, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/iraq-bring-on-the-dolphins/164269/7 "2003-03-26T14:47:34Z")
**Elu:** it certainly looks that way! [http://wwwi.reuters.com/images/mdf241292.jpg](http://wwwi.reuters.com/images/mdf241292.jpg) **Y’all** : What i was getting at , was Which is the **bigger benefit** of enlisting these our favourite mammals: A) Military use or B) Publicity? ---
**Author:** ![MSU\_1978](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac8455/32.png) [@MSU\_1978](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MSU_1978)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2003, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/iraq-bring-on-the-dolphins/164269/8 "2003-03-26T15:04:21Z")
They’ve got dolphins to hunt for mines, sea lions to look for enemy divers. The only animal that wouldn’t help was the French poodle. ---
**Author:** ![MSU\_1978](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac8455/32.png) [@MSU\_1978](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MSU_1978)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2003, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/iraq-bring-on-the-dolphins/164269/9 "2003-03-26T15:05:36Z")
By the way, credit the above to Jay Leno ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2003, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/iraq-bring-on-the-dolphins/164269/10 "2003-03-26T15:07:45Z")
It could be a publicity stunt, I suppose, but the fact remains that dolphins (assuming they can actually do the minehunting task, which seems reasonable) are much better suited to the marine environment (both in terms of sensory equipment and endurance) than humans, even with suits and tanks. It is analogous (or it ought to be) to using sniffer dogs. ---
**Author:** ![mazirian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/46a35a/32.png) [@mazirian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mazirian)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2003, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/iraq-bring-on-the-dolphins/164269/11 "2003-03-26T15:27:46Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by MSU 1978 \* > By the way, credit the above to Jay Leno Thank God, for a moment I thought it was supposed to be funny! ---
**Author:** ![RandySpears](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/858c86/32.png) [@RandySpears](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandySpears)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2003, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/iraq-bring-on-the-dolphins/164269/12 "2003-03-26T15:28:36Z")
**Mange:** I take it as a given that flipper is put to hard work in both, as the prominent media coverage and the info supplied by you seem to suggest. ---
**Author:** ![RandySpears](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/858c86/32.png) [@RandySpears](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandySpears)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2003, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/iraq-bring-on-the-dolphins/164269/13 "2003-03-26T15:37:53Z")
To put it bluntly i’m a bit appaled that this kind of feel-good animal news story is planted to “balance” the fact that the news has been full of “bad news” the last couple of days. At least that’s my interpretation of private flipper. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2003, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/iraq-bring-on-the-dolphins/164269/14 "2003-03-26T17:02:41Z")
Rumor has it the Iraqis plan to deploy a net made out of 6-pack rings to counter the dolphin menace. ---
**Author:** ![yawndave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/43a26b/32.png) [@yawndave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yawndave)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2003, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/iraq-bring-on-the-dolphins/164269/15 "2003-03-26T18:07:13Z")
RandySpears said: > [@](#): > > this kind of feel-good animal news story Curious as how this is supposed to make me feel good. Our culture has made use of animals for one reason or another for thousands of years, but this specific example doesn’t make me _feel good_. Whether it’s just wishful thinking that they have some sort of higher level of conciousness, or just anthropomorphization on my part, I just don’t think that dolphins deserve to be ‘used’ this way. ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2003, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/iraq-bring-on-the-dolphins/164269/16 "2003-03-26T18:08:12Z")
I don’t find this surprising at all. The Dolphins are big sonsabitches; their offensive line averages 300 pounds, and they’ve got maybe the best defensive backfield in the NFC. And they’re smart, too - most of these guys went to college! I like them to go all the way… …Huh? What? Oh. THOSE dolphins. ---
**Author:** ![Scruff](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Scruff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scruff)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2003, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/iraq-bring-on-the-dolphins/164269/17 "2003-03-26T18:13:56Z")
It is part of a cunning plan to instill Coalition forces with a sense of porpoise. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2003, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/iraq-bring-on-the-dolphins/164269/18 "2003-03-26T18:17:46Z")
Well, _I_ think they should use sharks. With frickin’ lasers attached to their heads. ---
**Author:** ![sturmhauke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47c2d/32.png) [@sturmhauke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sturmhauke)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2003, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/iraq-bring-on-the-dolphins/164269/19 "2003-03-27T00:00:27Z")
The best we can do is ill-tempered sea bass. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2003, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/iraq-bring-on-the-dolphins/164269/20 "2003-03-27T01:24:54Z")
“Excuse me, is this cetacean taken?” [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/iraq-bring-on-the-dolphins/164269.md?page=2)