# Irony, thy name is "Safety Lecture" **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 1, 2006, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/irony-thy-name-is-safety-lecture/378758 "2006-11-01T18:16:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![cbawlmer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71e660/32.png) [@cbawlmer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cbawlmer)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2006, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/irony-thy-name-is-safety-lecture/378758/21 "2006-11-03T00:19:16Z")
[QUOTE=ouryL] Seasoned sporting goods store employee to rookie: “_Never_ test fire a pellet gun. Leave it to us more experienced employees to determine if a returned gun is defective.” In walks customer with defective gun. Ambulance called because more experienced employee shoots his own hand. :eek: [/QUOTE] Well, he determined whether it was defective, didn’t he? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2006, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/irony-thy-name-is-safety-lecture/378758/22 "2006-11-03T01:51:57Z")
A couple months ago a couple of our flying county deputies survived a helicopter crash unhurt … only to have one of them slice his head open on the first aid kit while exiting the wreck. Over a dozen stitches required. ---
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2006, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/irony-thy-name-is-safety-lecture/378758/23 "2006-11-03T03:49:53Z")
[QUOTE=Broomstick] …only to have one of them slice his head open on the first aid kit while exiting the wreck. Over a dozen stitches required. [/QUOTE] Hmm. That’s the second case of somebody hurting their head on a first aid kit in this thread. They ought to outlaw those things before they kill someone. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![TheLoadedDog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/35a633/32.png) [@TheLoadedDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheLoadedDog)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2006, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/irony-thy-name-is-safety-lecture/378758/24 "2006-11-03T17:29:39Z")
At my workplace, we had the safety policy framed and hanging on the wall. One day, it somehow spontaneously fell - and brained a woman standing under it. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2006, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/irony-thy-name-is-safety-lecture/378758/25 "2006-11-03T18:12:12Z")
My example is far less injurious, but every bit as ironic. At a company I worked for, we were in a meeting where we were compelled to watch a video on how to conduct meetings, and it was specifically pointed out that management should be present at all meetings. Our management put the tape in, pressed the play button, and left. ---
**Author:** ![GargoyleWB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gargoylewb/32/199_2.png) [@GargoyleWB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GargoyleWB)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2006, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/irony-thy-name-is-safety-lecture/378758/26 "2006-11-03T18:51:38Z")
There’s a QVC or some other shopping-channel video where the host is selling knives and swords. He takes a katana (the cheap stainless steel kind) and smacks it on the table to demonstrate the strength of it. The blade snaps and impales him. ---
**Author:** ![Madd\_Maxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Madd\_Maxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Madd_Maxx)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2006, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/irony-thy-name-is-safety-lecture/378758/27 "2006-11-04T01:00:57Z")
I’m the captain of my building’s safety team. I’m literally dreading the day when I injur myself in some spectacular, public way at work. And really, it’s only a matter of time. ---
**Author:** ![jnglmassiv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f07891/32.png) [@jnglmassiv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jnglmassiv)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2006, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/irony-thy-name-is-safety-lecture/378758/28 "2006-11-04T18:38:09Z")
[QUOTE=GargoyleWB] There’s a QVC or some other shopping-channel video where the host is selling knives and swords. He takes a katana (the cheap stainless steel kind) and smacks it on the table to demonstrate the strength of it. The blade snaps and impales him. [/QUOTE] Here’s that one: ![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/oRv1m-Nq1Qo/maxresdefault.jpg)https://www.youtube.com/embed/oRv1m-Nq1Qo?feature=oembed&wmode=opaque I came in to mention that very clip. “Ooh, that got me good”.._gurgle_ ---
**Author:** ![antechinus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/fbc32d/32.png) [@antechinus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/antechinus)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2006, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/irony-thy-name-is-safety-lecture/378758/29 "2006-11-05T12:22:36Z")
[QUOTE=Sublight] The link goes to a [PDF report](http://www.vasa.org.au/pdf/memberlibrary/hydrocarbons/maclaine-cross.pdf), but here’s the gist: Basically, to demonstrate that hydrocarbon gas is safe to use in motor vehicles for… something or other, he gets into a car, opens a can to completely release the contents, then strikes a match. And more importantly, there’s video goodness: [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k0K1WPCWm2k](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k0K1WPCWm2k) The earth-shattering kaboom comes at about the 4:15 mark, followed by a clip of folks in the emergency room having a chuckle at his expense. [/QUOTE] I have been dreaming of viewing that video. Thanks so much **Sublight**. Is it possible to get the video file so I can easily show my class or can it only be viewed via Utube? What happened was there was an unanticipated leak of air into the vehicle that increased the concentration of oxygen such that the flammable gas was within the explosive limits. I have read the guys paper - “Safety Features of HC Refrigerants in Car Air Conditioning”. No amount of theory and ab initio modelling can stack up against empirical observation. ---
**Author:** ![bob\_loblaw](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f19dbf/32.png) [@bob\_loblaw](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bob_loblaw)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2006, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/irony-thy-name-is-safety-lecture/378758/30 "2006-11-05T14:35:09Z")
where i work, the freight elevator has a sign just inside, beside the control panel, and a sign outside beside the control panel at each floor, that says “trained operators only!” with a pictogram of crushed fingers between the doors. in the staff room, there is a blown-up picture of the guy who was the last (though certainly not the first) to lose a couple of fingers after pulling the doors shut by grabbing the outside handle, instead of the inside rope. this elevator has eaten at least seventeen fingers, including at least four from adventurous customers, in the ten years the club has been in operation. it’s amazing… i mean, you can’t find the up/down/stop/call buttons without seeing the warning signs… yet still, over three hands have cumulatively been lost to this beast in the last decade. ---
**Author:** ![Common\_Tater](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/common_tater/32/13846_2.png) [@Common\_Tater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Common_Tater)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2006, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/irony-thy-name-is-safety-lecture/378758/31 "2006-11-05T15:10:26Z")
The “Old Territorial Capitol” at Iowa City, Iowa was essentially destroyed by fire a couple years back including a rather rare walnut spiral staircase, as a result of asbestos abatement. The contracters were using cutting torches for asbestos removal or somesuch. Complete waste all around. ---
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2006, 11:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/irony-thy-name-is-safety-lecture/378758/32 "2006-11-06T11:33:59Z")
[QUOTE=antechinus] I have been dreaming of viewing that video. Thanks so much **Sublight**. Is it possible to get the video file so I can easily show my class or can it only be viewed via Utube? [/QUOTE] I have a Windows media version saved on my computer from sometime way back when. It’s 3.9MB, so if your mail server can handle it send me your email address (mine’s in my profile) and I’ll mail it to you. ---
**Author:** ![scareyfaerie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scareyfaerie/32/3135_2.png) [@scareyfaerie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scareyfaerie)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2006, 12:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/irony-thy-name-is-safety-lecture/378758/33 "2006-11-06T12:06:01Z")
I’m not sure if it’s irony or fate…I’m our office’s official fire warden. I’m also a professional fire-breather. If there’s a fire in the office, will they automatically blame me? ---
**Author:** ![slaphead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@slaphead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slaphead)\ **Post date:** [November 6, 2006, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/irony-thy-name-is-safety-lecture/378758/34 "2006-11-06T13:09:01Z")
[QUOTE=ScareyFaerie] I’m not sure if it’s irony or fate…I’m our office’s official fire warden. I’m also a professional fire-breather. If there’s a fire in the office, will they automatically blame me? [/QUOTE] Don’t know about that, but I would strongly suggest you take out the best fire-related personal injury policy you can find. ---
**Author:** ![rjk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ed655f/32.png) [@rjk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjk)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2006, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/irony-thy-name-is-safety-lecture/378758/35 "2006-11-07T15:40:05Z")
[QUOTE=pullin] About once a month our corporate newsletter carries an article worrying over the declining state of education (and **it’s** likely effect on our hi-tech business in the future). This month’s column-o-worry carried a statement that we should be concerned about “loosing our technological edge” due to declining education rates. [/QUOTE] It has to be said: that should be “its” in this sentence. Gaudere’s law strikes again. 😛 (Please note that I fixed at least two typos of my own while editing this post. There may be more!) ---
**Author:** ![Q.E.D](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/51bf81/32.png) [@Q.E.D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.E.D)\ **Post date:** [November 7, 2006, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/irony-thy-name-is-safety-lecture/378758/36 "2006-11-07T16:58:32Z")
[QUOTE=rjk] Gaudere’s law strikes again. 😛 [/QUOTE] No, it doesn’t. Gaudere’s Law specifically applies only to posts which are correcting someone else’s grammar or spelling errors in which the author makes one or more grammar or spelling errors of his own. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/irony-thy-name-is-safety-lecture/378758.md?page=1)