# Is a decent cable news network too much to ask? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [February 3, 2005, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-a-decent-cable-news-network-too-much-to-ask/288171 "2005-02-03T14:48:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-a-decent-cable-news-network-too-much-to-ask/288171/41 "2005-02-04T18:20:22Z")
Just tell a joke, damnit. ---
**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-a-decent-cable-news-network-too-much-to-ask/288171/42 "2005-02-04T18:47:56Z")
> [@A Monkey With a Gun](#): > > Just tell a joke, damnit. A liberal, a moderate, and a conservative walk into a bar… or: A liberal came upon a genie and said, “You’re a genie. Can you grant me three wishes?” The genie replied, “Yes, but only if you’re feeling generous enough to share your good fortune.” The liberal said, “I’m a liberal. I’m always happy to share.” The genie said, “O.K., then, whatever you wish for, I’ll give every conservative in the country two of it. What’s your first wish?” “I would like a new sports car.” “O.K., you’ve got it, and every conservative in the country gets two sports cars. What’s your second wish?” “I’d like a million dollars.” “O.K., you get a million dollars, every conservative gets two million dollars. What’s your third and final wish?” “Well, I’ve always wanted to donate a kidney.” ---
**Author:** ![brianjedi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@brianjedi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brianjedi)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-a-decent-cable-news-network-too-much-to-ask/288171/43 "2005-02-04T19:04:33Z")
> [@Rysler](#): > > Also, MSNBC is so far to the left it’s run by hippies. Does no one read their editorials page? Or Newsweek? Anna Quindlen eats the aborted children of Republicans for breakfast. It does not belong in the “even-handed” category. MSNBC run by hippies? The network that hired Michael Savage and Joe Scarborough, MSNBC? I’ll give you Keith Olbermann, but I wouldn’t describe MSNBC as being “so far to the left it’s run by hippies.” ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2005, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-a-decent-cable-news-network-too-much-to-ask/288171/44 "2005-02-04T19:37:14Z")
> [@mhendo](#): > > “Well, I’ve always wanted to donate a kidney.” 😃 Now that’s more like it. Damn, now I gotta think up a joke. ---
**Author:** ![Aro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b3f665/32.png) [@Aro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aro)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2005, 9:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-a-decent-cable-news-network-too-much-to-ask/288171/45 "2005-02-05T09:57:11Z")
> [@](#): > > …as cowardly and idiotic as \*\*aro \*\* Would you like me to pick up your dummy\* for you? Poor ‘moderate’ little baby in a world of extremist adults… Perhaps, in return, you could explain where the necessity for your petty little personal insults came from…? And could you please explain in what way anything I have said could be considered _“cowardly”_, or even _“idiotic”_? Especially as it is you who seems to lack the capacity to grasp the fundamental point at hand. Instead of thowing pathetic little insults about perhaps you could take the time to reply instead. Or you always could just attempt to divert the thread with a call for jokes again and pretend that was your intention all along. Sure. - pacificer ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2005, 10:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-a-decent-cable-news-network-too-much-to-ask/288171/46 "2005-02-05T10:31:39Z")
> [@Aro](#): > > And could you please explain in what way anything I have said could be considered _“cowardly”_ [/SIZE] Where are you from, Mr. “If you don’t know, I won’t tell you”? You don’t have the balls to explain your background when you talk about American politics. That’s where the “coward” thing came from. Wanker. Damn, I still haven’t thought of a decent joke. Sorry, **mhendo**. And **Aro** please tell me how I’m “diverting this thread” by asking for jokes. I’ve been asking for jokes since this whole damn thing started. My O.P. was meant to be humorous, my second post admonished people for lack of humor, my third post _was_ a joke, my fifth post asked people to make jokes about FOX, my sixth asks for jokes about all three networks… Need I go on? I’m not diverting this thread by asking for jokes. You’re the asshole who is highjacking _my_ thread by being such a humorless and argumentative son of a bitch. ---
**Author:** ![voltaire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voltaire/32/313_2.png) [@voltaire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voltaire)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2005, 12:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-a-decent-cable-news-network-too-much-to-ask/288171/47 "2005-02-05T12:09:04Z")
> [@A Monkey With a Gun](#): > > Where are you from, Mr. “If you don’t know, I won’t tell you”? You don’t have the balls to explain your background when you talk about American politics. That’s where the “coward” thing came from. > > Wanker. He responded to your question about his location in post #34, before you called him a coward. Hey, now that you know where he lives, you can make some more baseless insults about that. Also, just because you’re blind to someone’s argument, doesn’t mean that they are “blindly argumentative”. ---
**Author:** ![armedmonkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d6d6ee/32.png) [@armedmonkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/armedmonkey)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2005, 12:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-a-decent-cable-news-network-too-much-to-ask/288171/48 "2005-02-05T12:40:12Z")
> [@voltaire](#): > > He responded to your question about his location in post #34, before you called him a coward. Hey, now that you know where he lives, you can make some more baseless insults about that. _::slaps head::_ Northern Ireland. Damn, how’d I miss that? O.K., I’ll take the “cowardly” thing back, but somebody from Belfast ain’t exactly your go to guy when talking about where the center is in American politics. And he still killed any chance this thread ever had of being funny. ---
**Author:** ![Aro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b3f665/32.png) [@Aro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aro)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2005, 9:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-a-decent-cable-news-network-too-much-to-ask/288171/49 "2005-02-06T09:43:09Z")
> [@](#): > > \*…somebody from Belfast ain’t exactly your go to guy when talking about where the center is in American politics. \* I’m not from Belfast, but it’s not too far away, I guess. I wasn’t ever talking about the centre of US politics, I was talking about the centre of \*world \* politics, and the range of US political positions within that context- just to be clear - where even your left is to the right. > [@](#): > > \*And he still killed any chance this thread ever had of being funny… \* Hey dude, I added two jokes, where’s yours? 🙂 And in case you are truly concerned about the humour angle, I’ve certainly found the thread quite amusing to date. So don’t sweat it. _\_ I fully realise the Straight Dope is an US message board, hosted on an US computer with a majority of US members. But if it is truly serious about fighting ignorance (as it says it is) it (and its members) has to realise the world at large is bigger, wider, more varied and certainly much more important than just the US. It has to expand its outlook and realise that it can’t be seen to be forwarding \*only \* those views held by its hosts (like yourself) and should really learn to embrace the contrasting views of the wider world. This approach would ensure a greater understanding and acceptance of how the rest of the world really thinks and operates, rather than just limiting itself only to the blinkered perspective available within the stunted political debates currently happening within the boundaries of the US. I understand if you feel this is unfair. You believe the US is the best, number one, and should thus have the greater say in how things are. You think US opinions matter more than those from other nations. You think the US is the greatest nation on earth. I just hope you learn this is only _your opinion_, one borne from constant exposure to similar thought. I realise it is difficult for you to accept criticism of your position and of your countries approach to world affairs, at any level. This is a lesson you somehow have yet to learn. If you, as a member of this board, also embrace the ethos of _“fighting ignorance”_, then you should also support an approach that amends your attitude to understanding and to the acceptance of critical thought from the outside world. That world outside the US is, after all, what makes up the vast majority of this planet we all have to share. But if this board only means, to you, scoring points and giving abuse and belittlement to those who disagree with you, then you should continue on your current path, down the same tired road of ignorance and arrogance. Whatever you wish. I leave it for you as a matter of conscience. _\_ ---
**Author:** ![42fish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/4/b487fb/32.png) [@42fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/42fish)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-a-decent-cable-news-network-too-much-to-ask/288171/50 "2005-02-07T14:42:27Z")
> [@A Monkey With a Gun](#): > > CNN is more subtle than FOX, but the [liberal] bias is still obvious if you’re a moderate. > … > > It’s a systemic bias, also indicated by how the previous segment sub-posted a statistic highlating the fact that blacks die younger than whites in a story about social security. Is that really germaine to the story? No, of course it isn’t. So why play the race card? “African-American males die sooner than other males do, which means the system is inherently unfair to a certain group of people. And that needs to be fixed.” President Bush at a Jan. 11 forum on Social Security in Washington DC (quoted in Courtland Milloy’s column in the _Washington Post_ Feb. 6, p. C1) So does this make the president a closet liberal? ---
**Author:** ![NinjaChick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/71c47a/32.png) [@NinjaChick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinjaChick)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2005, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-a-decent-cable-news-network-too-much-to-ask/288171/51 "2005-02-07T15:45:03Z")
So turn the talking heads off, and pick up a newspaper. Preferably two, at least. Preferably not USA Today. Or, go to [http://news.google.com](http://news.google.com). It’s called reading. Sorry, if you want to be spoon-fed, you’re going to get crappy stuff. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-a-decent-cable-news-network-too-much-to-ask/288171.md?page=2)