Angel, I probably wouldn’t ask her to do it over, either. But I’d probably adjust the tip, and I’d probably reply to the “but you look cute,” with “thanks, but I really prefer it the way I asked for it.”
But I’m not too easy to intimidate now. Ten years ago, I wouldn’t even have had the nerve to tell her how I wanted it, and I would have let it go if she’d made me look like Medusa.
Bernse, I think I know the salon you’re talking about. Maybe I should take a little drive and check them out.
I think this definitely is a “guy/girl” thing. How many women here have left salons with haircuts they didn’t like or styles they didn’t like, and didn’t say anything to the stylist? Just about all of us? I think it’s more of a “don’t want to hurt feelings” thing more than anything - women can be extremely reluctant to make negative comments to someone’s face. I know when I’ve had bad cuts or do’s, I just go home and fix it; telling someone that they screwed up and I don’t like what they did would make me upset, too.
I used to go to a fancy hair salon.
I would spend between 150 - 175 dollars to get my hair colored and trimmed. I would also be pressured to get a perm that I did not want because “your hair is screaming for body” and buy the froufrou products.
I quit going. I color my own hair and wash it with baby shampoo. The only thing I spend a lot of money on is conditioner.
My hair has never looked better.
Fenris, I understand that $50 is quite reasonable for a ritzy salon haircut. This is why I haven’t gone to a salon in eight years.
Thanks, Guin. I like the dress, too. So far I’ve got two friends who want to wear it at their weddings- the only problem is that they’re both six inches taller than me. We’ll have to see…
Are you all realy sure they are being snooty or are you projecting your insecurities?
Angel, she wouldn’t have had to keep other patrons waiting if she’d listened to you in the first damn place!
I feel your pain about the styling, though. For my sister’s wedding, I got a henna rinse at a salon in her town. Looked great, beautiful…but then the stylist took up the curling iron and basically widened my hair until I could barely fit through the door! I looked like Miss Okefenokee Rhubarb Queen. Uch!
That shouldn’t matter. I work in the service industry and we always try to disarm our customers and make them feel welcome. If someone comes into our business with a chip on their shoulder, there isn’t much we can do, but if they’re just nervous we make an effort to be warm and friendly to put them at ease.
Even if there is some projection going on, the staff should at least meet the customer halfway.
That seems to be a good point lola. I do think that much of the snootyness is projection and not really there but the salons should know that and make a large effort to overcome.
Kung Fu Lola hit it on the head.
And jjtm, for the record, I approach everyone with friendliness and expectation only that they will be helpful and polite. When they are not, I simply choose to withdraw my patronage. I do not get confrontational, I do not have a chip on my shoulder, I simply walk away without further word – and take my issue up later with the person’s manager.
And when a request to make an appointment is met by scowls, sighs, and pulled faces by an obnoxious little receptionista at a SALon, that’s when I get angry and would gladly tell them to kiss my patron butt – but I don’t, because unlike them, my mother raised me to be more polite to people face to face.
I used to get all bent out of shape trying those high-pricey, snooty salon places. Any woman vastly desires to look her best, after all, and if we have to go through (vast) humiliation to get there, well…
However, then I discovered that it was a lot easier to let my hair grow long then braid it back. I learned how to French braid, upbraid, and even do a crown braid for varieties sake. The first couple weeks were rough, but then I got the hang of it. I had simply checked a book out of the library to learn how to do all those braids by myself.
I have to takes about five minutes in the morning to do it, of course, but it looks even better if I do the braiding while it’s still damp. If I’m really dressing up, I’ll comb the front to make it smooth, roll up the braid, and put a few hair sticks through the bun. It looks stunningly professional, unlike any other long hairstyle I’ve tried.
I’m naturally a bit grey in the ‘ash blonde’ region, so I color my hair. I use those boxes from the supermarket, and vary between DEEP red mahoghany and a lighter cherry red every month, to keep highlights in it.
When I do need a trim, I seek out a professional barber (almost always a man, with the chairs and the nice-smelling shop) and ask humbly if he is willing to cut a woman’s hair, if she only wants a flat trim to even up the ends. This always gets me big smiles, warm welcomes, and even the other customers grin at me. I pay about $12 dollars, all told, and the real barbers will even brush the cut hair off your neck before taking off the apron, so you don’t get it down your shirt-collar.
Definitely ask your friends for recommendations for a smaller, less uptight place. You’re going there to look and feel beautiful, not like crap!
My mom sent me to her hairdresser, who works out of her home and is an absolute wizardess with hair. She always chats with me first to make sure she’s doing what I want, and it always comes out looking better than I ever hoped. She only takes clients by recommendation, and she’s always busy! Costs more than Supercuts ($40 for a cut), but lasts longer (at least twice as long) between cuts before it looks scraggly and looks way better the whole time, so to me it’s worth it.
I do my own color at home, though; $5 a shot. Can’t beat that!
Definitely ask your friends for recommendations for a smaller, less uptight place. You’re going there to look and feel beautiful, not like crap!
My mom sent me to her hairdresser, who works out of her home and is an absolute wizardess with hair. She always chats with me first to make sure she’s doing what I want, and it always comes out looking better than I ever hoped. She only takes clients by recommendation, and she’s always busy! Costs more than Supercuts ($40 for a cut), but lasts longer (at least twice as long) between cuts before it looks scraggly and looks way better the whole time, so to me it’s worth it.
I do my own color at home, though; $5 a shot. Can’t beat that!
That’s how I am. I don’t think I’ve ever been happy with a “salon” haircut. I have really curly hair and women with straight hair, in my experience, just don’t know how the hell to cut it. Unfortuantly 99% of the “stylists” I’ve ended up with, have had straight hair. I had my friend cutting it for awhile, then she moved away so I decided to go to a salon with my sister in law. Man, that was a mistake. I told the girl about 5 times after she shampooed it “my hair really springs up when it dries, so only take off about half of what you really want to come off.” She must have totally not been listening, because she ended up cutting it exactly how short I said while it was still sopping wet By the time I realized how short she was doing it (she started in the back, I couldn’t see) it was too late. I had to let her finish. My sister in law (who has stick straight hair) looked great, I on the other hand, once my hair dried, looked like a freak.
It was a total hack job, but did I say anything? Nope. What good would it have done? It wasn’t like she could wave a magic hair cutting wand and grow 6 inches of my hair back. I just gave her a shitty tip and haven’t gotten my hair cut again since. It’s really getting too long too but I’m traumatized.
I had originally intended to get my hair done for my wedding. I had won a gift certificate for a body massage at a local spa here in town and decided that since they came highly recommended, I’d just let them do it all. Tanning sessions, my nails, the massage and lastly, my hair. All to the tune of about $200. The two gals that worked there, also owned the business and were very, very conscientious, and made my experience well worth the money.
I had a different problem when it came to having my hair styled. I didn’t trust the stylist, which was dumb :smack:, because I had seen their work in person. I had seen some wonderful styles that they had done for other weddings and for the local high school proms.
I knew exactly how I wanted it done. I had dyed it myself, a dark, rich auburn color that I just love and that looked wonderful against the white veil and head piece that I had made myself. I had actually styled my hair myself to make sure that it was what I wanted, and that it looked right put together with the head piece. I was terrified that they wouldn’t be able to recreate the picture I had in my head on my wedding day. I kept telling myself that I really did want someone else to do my hair because the day I wanted it to be perfect would be the day that it wouldn’t want to work for me.
Finally two days before the wedding, in a state of panic, I called and cancelled the hair appointment. :eek:
I went out and bought some small white clips. I could hide them easily in a mess of hair, and even if they did show, being white, they wouldn’t look out of place. I layed in a supply of bobby pins and went to work. I gave myself plenty of time before the wedding, just in case I had to re-wash, and start over.
Half an hour, half a bottle of spray gel and mousse, and half a ton of bobby pins later, I was good to go. And it looked good, I even amazed myself. 
The moral of this horribly long winded post? Do what feels right.
My bridesmaids found a mutual friend to style their hair. Total cost… $20.00
I agree with the other previous posters… check around. Ask a friend, or do it yourself if you’re comfortable with it.
Best of luck! (on the hair, the battle against snobby stylists, and, of course, the marriage!!)
Syl
I’ve never paid for a haircut. I used to say I’d never set foot in a hairdressers, but that changed last Saturday when I popped into the salon where my SO was getting his hair cut. It’s a tiny little place next door to his mum’s gift shop, and his mum was in there having a cup of tea and chatting with the hairdresser (who is a very nice lass), and she beckoned me in. It was town carnival day, you see, so the shops in the back streets were deserted. SO’s mum was getting no customers so she popped next door. (Just to explain that she doesn’t usually watch her son having his hair cut).
I do my own hair. Cutting, yea, even with light layers for texturing. I permanent colour it, too. I usually dry it naturally, but I blow dry it with a round brush and some mousse or straightening jizz if I want it to look sleeker.
I’m useless at up-dos. My hair doesn’t like being told what to do. Anything more complicated than one big clip or two small ones is out.
I don’t let anyone intimidate me. I’m very overweight, wear cheap clothes but I treat makeup counter ladies with courtesy and respect. Even when I go to Nordstrom’s and check out the expensive makeup, I get good service and plenty of free samples. For my hair, I go to Frizzles at Springfield Mall in Springfield Virginia, and I have Pattie cut my hair about every 10-12 weeks. It costs about $42.00 bucks which is a lot, but I can almost recreate the style Pattie gives me, which is saying a lot. I color my hair myself and I make sure only to cover the roots and then bring the color through the rest of the hair for the last two minutes of processing. I will agree with the poster who said that she only spends a lot of money on good conditioner. One of my tips is to rinse your hair every day in the shower. Every 2 days, shampoo your hair with a mild shampoo, only one lathering. Use conditioner on your wet hair on three days. The other two days, just dry your hair after your shower. Try not to use heated appliances on your hair if you can help it. My frizzies are really calming down after this advice.
I am totally anti-salon. My husband cuts my hair. Before him, I did it my self or had my mom do it. For my wedding, I hired a co-worker who styled me, three bridesmaids, the flower girl, mom, and mom-in-law for $100. My sisters friend showed up (for free) to do make-up.
Not a republican but frugal.
Lezlers
I have the same problem. Or used to. I cut my own hair now, although getting a straight line at the back on madly curly hair takes some degree of flexibility and jiggling of mirrors
I’m happier now because I’m not subjected to the stylist oooing and ahhing about how “cute” my curls are and “you are so lucky to have curls!” - yeah, right; plus I’m not subjected to an hour of mind numbingly boring chatter: no, I’m not interested in what your boyfriend likes; how many drinks you had last night; where you’re going on your holiday; no I haven’t tried the very latest, hideously expensive gloop that passes for moisturiser/hair products… ugh.
I think some of you guys are just going to the wrong places. I just moved and need to find a new hairdresser that I trust, but the lady I used to go to charged me $40 for a simple cut - but I loved her. I had tried cheaper places, but no one got it exactly right. And she never tried to make me feel stupid - she told me that she had seen her expensive products on sale at a drugstore for cheaper and that I should try to find them there if I could.
I’d love to find someone cheaper who can do exactly what I want, but if I have to spend a little bit more, I think it’s okay. I don’t wear makeup, I don’t wear jewelry, I am a very low-maintenance person. So if I want to splurge a bit on my hair, I don’t feel too guilty.
Trafacant is intimidated by barbers and hair salons.