# Is being an open racist more ethical than being a hidden crypto-racist? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 30, 2013, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-an-open-racist-more-ethical-than-being-a-hidden-crypto-racist/662297 "2013-06-30T23:16:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2013, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-an-open-racist-more-ethical-than-being-a-hidden-crypto-racist/662297/1 "2013-06-30T23:16:56Z")
Per the Paula Deen fiasco it seems that we have thankfully progressed to the point that being an open or casual racist, even if you did it in the past, is no longer even marginally socially acceptable. Per this local Facebook post below I wondered if the man being open about his racism was more ethical than if he kept his mouth shut then blew up after he wangled it out of her after a few dates. > [@](#): > > In the wake of the whole Paula Deen fiasco…I feel the need to share something that happened to me Friday that still leaves me furious. > GUY: What’s your dating > preference…black, > white or both. > ME: Why? > GUY: Do you date black > guys? I wanna know.. > That’s why!! > ME: Yes I do date black > men. > GUY: Thanks for being > honest > ME: Wow I didn’t realize > there is still so > much ignorance in > the world…good > luck because you > definitely need it > GUY: No not ignorance, > I just prefer not > to date nigger > lovers. > ME: Saying the N word > isn’t ignorance? > And screening > girls you wanna > talk to to see if > they date black > isn’t ignorance? > > No answer after that…but do you all wanna know the worst part of this. This man is a 43 year old retired sheriff…and in a pretty > local town. I’m angry.. > shocked…and appalled that this man held such an > important position where > people of all races were at his mercy. ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2013, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-an-open-racist-more-ethical-than-being-a-hidden-crypto-racist/662297/2 "2013-07-01T00:24:12Z")
If being an “open racist” means it affects how you treat people, how you speak and act, and being a “hidden crypto-racist” means you treat everyone equally but harbor racist ideas in your mind, then no, being an open racist is not more ethical. ---
**Author:** ![the\_diego](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7bcc69/32.png) [@the\_diego](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/the_diego)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2013, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-an-open-racist-more-ethical-than-being-a-hidden-crypto-racist/662297/3 "2013-07-01T01:28:59Z")
“Saying the N word isn’t ignorance? And screening girls you wanna talk to to see if they date black isn’t ignorance?” This could mean a lot of things but ignorance is low in possibility. Maybe people just don’t consult the Webster anymore. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2013, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-an-open-racist-more-ethical-than-being-a-hidden-crypto-racist/662297/4 "2013-07-01T03:43:53Z")
> [@Thudlow\_Boink](#): > > If being an “open racist” means it affects how you treat people, how you speak and act, and being a “hidden crypto-racist” means you treat everyone equally but harbor racist ideas in your mind, then no, being an open racist is not more ethical. And there’s now no longer any reason for this thread. ---
**Author:** ![antonio107](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/7ea924/32.png) [@antonio107](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/antonio107)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2013, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-an-open-racist-more-ethical-than-being-a-hidden-crypto-racist/662297/5 "2013-07-01T03:53:31Z")
Unless you mean “they harbour racist Sentiments, which are manifested in their discriminatory ways, but they wouldn’t openly voice their racism.” E.g., it’s entirely possible that you disapprove of interracial marriage, hate Barack Obama, and are scared when you see young black men late at night. But if anyone asked you, you would vehemently deny racism, and say all the right and politically correct things. ---
**Author:** ![Blackberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecd19e/32.png) [@Blackberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackberry)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2013, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-an-open-racist-more-ethical-than-being-a-hidden-crypto-racist/662297/6 "2013-07-01T05:18:50Z")
In general it really depends, but for the example in the OP, I think it’s more ethical to be upfront about it so the other person doesn’t have to waste their time with an asshole. Well, maybe not more ethical exactly, because the person isn’t doing it out of a sense of ethics I assume, but it does work out better. I’ve had a few white guys who were racist but wouldn’t admit it want to date me even though they knew I date black men and have a biracial daughter. It would be better if they’d just be honest with themselves and others and accept that their views are racist and then either live with that openly or change it if they’re not comfortable being racist. On the other hand no one wants to have people going around openly making racist remarks to them out of nowhere. But if you’re honest about your views _when it comes up_, yes, that’s generally better. ---
**Author:** ![tralfamidor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/779978/32.png) [@tralfamidor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tralfamidor)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2013, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-an-open-racist-more-ethical-than-being-a-hidden-crypto-racist/662297/7 "2013-07-01T05:27:49Z")
Well, I dunno. Are you a racist if you dislike black people? Are you a heightist if you dislike short people? Are you a rightist if you dislike left-handed people? Or could it be that having a preference regarding with whom you wish to associate is valid, and that expressing such a preference is also valid (I’ll bet that most black folks prefer to hang with other black folks, and that if any one of them said as much, he would _not_ be called a racist)? ---
**Author:** ![Blackberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecd19e/32.png) [@Blackberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackberry)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2013, 5:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-an-open-racist-more-ethical-than-being-a-hidden-crypto-racist/662297/8 "2013-07-01T05:38:56Z")
> [@tralfamidor](#): > > Well, I dunno. Are you a racist if you dislike black people? Are you a heightist if you dislike short people? Are you a rightist if you dislike left-handed people? WTF point are you even trying to make? No one actually dislikes shorties or lefties. If someone did, in addition to being a nutjob, yes, it would make them some “-ist” word that doesn’t exist because it’s not a real thing. ---
**Author:** ![tralfamidor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/779978/32.png) [@tralfamidor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tralfamidor)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2013, 5:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-an-open-racist-more-ethical-than-being-a-hidden-crypto-racist/662297/9 "2013-07-01T05:59:20Z")
> [@Blackberry](#): > > WTF point are you even trying to make? No one actually dislikes shorties or lefties. If someone did, in addition to being a nutjob, yes, it would make them some “-ist” word that doesn’t exist because it’s not a real thing. You did, evidently, indeed miss my point. Utterly. ---
**Author:** ![Otara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a88e4f/32.png) [@Otara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otara)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2013, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-an-open-racist-more-ethical-than-being-a-hidden-crypto-racist/662297/10 "2013-07-01T06:08:30Z")
The person in the op is being upfront in order to avoid other people who are more open minded, ie who are happy to date other races. That reads to me as more a self-serving motivation than particularly ethical, ie concerned for the other person in any way. Otara ---
**Author:** ![Blackberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecd19e/32.png) [@Blackberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackberry)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2013, 6:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-an-open-racist-more-ethical-than-being-a-hidden-crypto-racist/662297/11 "2013-07-01T06:12:11Z")
> [@tralfamidor](#): > > You did, evidently, indeed miss my point. Utterly. Then clarify. ---
**Author:** ![epbrown01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7ba0ec/32.png) [@epbrown01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/epbrown01)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2013, 8:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-an-open-racist-more-ethical-than-being-a-hidden-crypto-racist/662297/12 "2013-07-01T08:42:09Z")
> [@Thudlow\_Boink](#): > > If being an “open racist” means it affects how you treat people, how you speak and act, and being a “hidden crypto-racist” means you treat everyone equally but harbor racist ideas in your mind, then no, being an open racist is not more ethical. This. Eliminating racism is impossible - the best any society can hope for is legally eliminating institutionalized discrimination and stigmatizing overt racist attitudes to the point they are sublimated. It will always be out there, for various reasons, until humanity is so genetically mixed no one can sort out anyone else. At which point we’ll latch onto something else. That said, in my opinion there’s one area where whatever warped attitudes someone has are sacrosanct and that’s choosing a mate. Who you choose to live your life with or even be intimate with is one area where you don’t have to justify your preferences to anyone, no matter how unpleasant they are to others. As long as dude is willing to live with the consequences his little quiz results in (women leaving in disgust), it’s on him. FWIW, this is one of those willful blind spots a lot of white guys I’ve known mention: “I’m not racist (eyeroll mine), but I wouldn’t date/marry a woman that’s dated a black guy.” ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2013, 12:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-an-open-racist-more-ethical-than-being-a-hidden-crypto-racist/662297/13 "2013-07-01T12:38:51Z")
The hidden racist is easily more ethical. This is something most of us learn at childhood. Remember Bambi? Thumper: If you can’t say something about someone then don’t say nothing at all. ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2013, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-an-open-racist-more-ethical-than-being-a-hidden-crypto-racist/662297/14 "2013-07-01T14:13:23Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > The hidden racist is easily more ethical. This is something most of us learn at childhood. > Remember Bambi? > > Thumper: If you can’t say something about someone then don’t say nothing at all. Thumper is a tautologist? ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2013, 2:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-an-open-racist-more-ethical-than-being-a-hidden-crypto-racist/662297/15 "2013-07-02T02:03:39Z")
> [@muldoonthief](#): > > Thumper is a tautologist? LOL, I forgot the nice. If you can’t say something _nice_ about someone, then don’t say nothing at all. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![colander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e8c25b/32.png) [@colander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/colander)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2013, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-an-open-racist-more-ethical-than-being-a-hidden-crypto-racist/662297/16 "2013-07-02T03:19:20Z")
> [@Blackberry](#): > > WTF point are you even trying to make? **tralfamidor** is just a very, very ethical guy, you know? ---
**Author:** ![the\_diego](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7bcc69/32.png) [@the\_diego](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/the_diego)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2013, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-an-open-racist-more-ethical-than-being-a-hidden-crypto-racist/662297/17 "2013-07-02T04:26:41Z")
The ass-wipes always come out after a few days. ---
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2013, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-an-open-racist-more-ethical-than-being-a-hidden-crypto-racist/662297/18 "2013-07-02T17:47:03Z")
A lot of people have hidden views, preferences, thoughts, but they act like a civil person in public. It’s called living in a society. If everybody said every screwball thing that popped into their head it would be hard to be out in public. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2013, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-an-open-racist-more-ethical-than-being-a-hidden-crypto-racist/662297/19 "2013-07-02T21:13:50Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > And there’s now no longer any reason for this thread. You are exactly right. Which is why my post is directly after yours. ---
**Author:** ![diggerwam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/919ad9/32.png) [@diggerwam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/diggerwam)\ **Post date:** [July 2, 2013, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-an-open-racist-more-ethical-than-being-a-hidden-crypto-racist/662297/20 "2013-07-02T21:47:13Z")
I’d rather know exactly who I’m dealing with than find out far into a relationship that the person holds ignorant beliefs. So I believe that an open racist is much more ethical. Kind of like being a fetishist, you pretty much have to lay it on the table pretty early on, or else you may feel lied to. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-an-open-racist-more-ethical-than-being-a-hidden-crypto-racist/662297.md?page=2)