# Is Being Opposed to Interracial Relations Necessarilly Racist **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [May 13, 2011, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735 "2011-05-13T01:09:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Bridget\_Burke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7cd45c/32.png) [@Bridget\_Burke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bridget_Burke)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2011, 12:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735/41 "2011-05-13T12:27:08Z")
1. Could be racist. If the person in question just isn’t attracted to certain physical characteristics, that’s one thing. But not every member of a “race” is identical. (At least the OP seems to be admitting now that sexual attraction is not From The Devil; or is he still holding out for a desire-free “relationship”?) 2. Racist. 3. Racist. ---
**Author:** ![Mahaloth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mahaloth/32/1079_2.png) [@Mahaloth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mahaloth)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2011, 12:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735/42 "2011-05-13T12:46:18Z")
> [@Tom\_Tildrum](#): > > Does “relationship” for purposes of this question include adoption of a child? > > (For the record, I have no personal objection to interracial adoption, but I know that it can arouse some opposition in some people who have no problem with interracial romance. Wait. It does arouse some opposition in some people who have no problem with interracial romance? I’ve adopted two kids from Korea, so I guess I’m ignorant…but…it does? ---
**Author:** ![Mahaloth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mahaloth/32/1079_2.png) [@Mahaloth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mahaloth)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2011, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735/43 "2011-05-13T12:49:00Z")
> [@Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](#): > > That is contradictory. Asians have been persecuted just as bad as blacks well into the 20th Century, yet look where they are. What do you mean by this? Are Asians further ahead than other races in this country? Or further behind? I have no idea what you mean. And I’m a little scared of what you could be implying. 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Dorjan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dorjan/32/12440_2.png) [@Dorjan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dorjan)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2011, 1:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735/44 "2011-05-13T13:07:01Z")
> [@Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](#): > > adictory. Asians have been persecuted just as bad as blacks well into the 20th Century, yet look where they are. What about religion, is someone who does not want to marry someone else for religious reasons a religious bigot? Congratulations. It’s not often that reading something on the Dope literally makes me laugh out loud at work. You just accomplished that! ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2011, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735/45 "2011-05-13T13:20:12Z")
I believe it’s okay to reject it for yourself, but it’s not okay to tell others not to do it. And using the law to block other people’s actions that are not hurting other people is definitely wrong. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2011, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735/46 "2011-05-13T13:37:56Z")
> [@China\_Guy](#): > > Wait until you bring Mrs. Right, who happens to be a Platinum Blond, home to meet the parents… 🙂 I think they’d have good reason to object, being that she’s married. ---
**Author:** ![Shakester](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shakester/32/437_2.png) [@Shakester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shakester)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2011, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735/47 "2011-05-13T13:58:29Z")
> [@China\_Guy](#): > > So, gentlemen prefer blondes is ok? Or “I’m really attracted to brunettes” is kosher. > > Yet “I’m attracted to Asians” is racist. I lived 25 years of practically my entire adult life in Asia, I speak Chinese fluently and Japanese at a basic level. Me dating the locals is racist? Your implication is that dating an American at the exclusion of locals would not be? My Asian attraction is a personal thing, yet I’ve dated other women too. > > It’s not black and white like you paint it. I won’t defend the sex tourists but don’t imply that I am one either. How do you get out of what I wrote that I’m implying that I think all interracial relationships are bad? Did you miss the bit where I said I’ve been in interracial relationships myself? In post 31, and again in the exact same post that you just quoted? ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2011, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735/48 "2011-05-13T14:03:01Z")
I find them all quite racist. 2 and 3 for obvious reasons, 1 because dismissing an entire race from your dating pool because you ‘don’t find X attractive’ when X = race is racist. Look, nobody has to like every different shape, colour, size, etc of person but blanketly declaring that ‘I don’t think white women are attractive.’ is dumb. You haven’t met every white woman. Ditto for any other race. ---
**Author:** ![Shakester](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shakester/32/437_2.png) [@Shakester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shakester)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2011, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735/49 "2011-05-13T14:07:16Z")
> [@MandaJo](#): > > I agree that it’s not black and white by any means, but I think there is a certain type of person that fits his description, and for whom “racial preference” becomes prejudice. It’s a question of degree: the guy who has hard-drives filled with porn of only one particular, “exotic” race, who always mentions when an attractive woman of a particular race comes into his field of view–be it in meatspace or in a movie/tv/whatever, and always mentions her race along with the fact that she’s hot. > > For guys like this, it’s like they’ve moved from thinking “all women are meat” and moved up to “[exotic race] women are meat”, and, in some really weird way, they think that makes them more enlightened/open-minded than their peers, so they brag about it. The technical word for these guys is “creeper” and they are best avoided. > > But that’s not every man who has a physical attraction towards a certain race, or even an emotional attraction towards a certain culture. Thank-you, I’m glad that there’s at least one person that understood what I what I was saying. Being attracted to someone of a different race; fine. Turning it into a creepy fetish; not fine. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2011, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735/50 "2011-05-13T14:40:25Z")
Moving thread from IMHO to Great Debates. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2011, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735/51 "2011-05-13T14:45:18Z")
Not desiring to be in an interracial relationship is not necessarily racist. But disapproving of the actions of those who are in such relationships is clearly racist, and actively opposing them is hateful. ---
**Author:** ![Koxinga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4af34b/32.png) [@Koxinga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koxinga)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2011, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735/52 "2011-05-13T15:08:20Z")
Being hypervigilent on the question of whether a given couple is interracial or not, and when they are, generously deigning to “withhold judgment” until the couple’s behavior can be observed, strikes me as a bit racist in itself. ---
**Author:** ![China\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/779978/32.png) [@China\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/China_Guy)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2011, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735/53 "2011-05-13T15:19:39Z")
> [@Shakester](#): > > If you give me the impression that you see women of _x_ race as automatically “sexier” than average, that to me is a valuable data point for making a judgement on whether you’re someone I’m going to want to get to know better and possibly be friends with. > > If you’re just someone who happens to be in an interracial relationship, then fine, good luck to you. I’ve been there, and I’ve heard some quite dodgy remarks about how “lucky” I was to have scored with the sexy exotic chick. Yep, that’s racism. It’s not “round 'em up and send 'em back where they came from” racism, but it’s definitley going to make me think less of you if you say it to me. If you read your second paragraph, it \*can \*come across like “some of my best friends are black” meme. I’m wired that I find Asians more sexually attractive for \*me \*than say blondes, and blondes moreso than redheads. That is not some creepy fetish - it’s simply what I like or the way I’m wired. Thank god, as a society, we’re getting to where there is acceptance that some people are physically attracted to only members of their own gender. That used to be illegal, immoral, an affront to society, etc. and called out some of the worst in bigotry. Now if someone says “I like Asian women because they are docile, subservient and shag like a minx” that’s a racial stereotype (and waaaaaaaay off base if my 25 years in Asia is anything to go by and shows an amaziing level of ignorance). And for anyone to pre-judge and put me in this “Asian fetish” camp because I’ve been married to a Shagnhaiese for nearly 2 decades, is projecting their own racist bias. Again, I go back to “Gentlemen Prefer Blondes” is normal but “Gentlemen Prefer Asians” is a creepy fetish. Nice double standard. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2011, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735/54 "2011-05-13T15:38:07Z")
Ah, this again. We had a very long thread about this recently - it was mostly about religion and I know this thread was moved here from IMHO, but some of the same ground was covered. In general I’d say everyone has their own preferences in terms of characteristics - physically, culturally, and so on - and it’s not accurate to call that racist or prejudiced on its own. Nobody is equally attracted to everyone else and nobody connects with everyone. When you start ruling out people categorically, it isn’t necessarily racist (or insert relevant term), but does show a level of closed-mindedness and difficulty in treating people as individuals. Chalk me up as another person who thinks options two and three are definitely racist. It’s not just that they display hatred or a view that one group is inferior to another, it’s the view that race is a real, immutable category and that it overrides any other characteristics a person may have. ---
**Author:** ![gonzomax](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e8c25b/32.png) [@gonzomax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gonzomax)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2011, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735/55 "2011-05-13T15:43:16Z")
The first is a personal preference . Some women want a tall guy. Some people will not marry an overweight person. While rejecting all people of a certain race has a smear of racism in it, it would be wrong to decide it is not a choice they are entitled to make. 2 and 3 are racist. ---
**Author:** ![Blackberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecd19e/32.png) [@Blackberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackberry)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2011, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735/56 "2011-05-13T15:45:37Z")
> [@alice\_in\_wonderland](#): > > I find them all quite racist. > > 2 and 3 for obvious reasons, 1 because dismissing an entire race from your dating pool because you ‘don’t find X attractive’ when X = race is racist. Look, nobody has to like every different shape, colour, size, etc of person but blanketly declaring that ‘I don’t think white women are attractive.’ is dumb. You haven’t met every white woman. Ditto for any other race. I haven’t met every woman but I can still say I’m just not attracted to women without it being sexist or homophobic. I mean, I guess I can’t say 100% for sure that no woman who has ever lived would be attractive to me, but I can’t say for sure that the world won’t end in 8 days either, and still I think both are unlikely enough to pretty much just not bother considering. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2011, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735/57 "2011-05-13T16:48:31Z")
> [@Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](#): > > Just as the title says. > > For various subcases: > > (1) Simply personally not wanting an Interracial relationship > (2) Disapproving of others’ interracial relationships > (3) Wanting to ban or otherwise block interracial relationships. 1.Highly likely, depending on reason for not wanting one, but not _necessarily_. 2.Definitely yes and 3.Definitely yes. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2011, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735/58 "2011-05-13T16:57:40Z")
> [@MrDibble](#): > > 1.Highly likely, depending on reason for not wanting one, but not _necessarily_. let me elaborate. If your reason is that you don’t find people of a particular race attractive, you’re a racist. As soon as you start putting people into groups based on what they look like, (as opposed to what they’ve done) you’re a racist, IMO. There’s a vast semantic difference between saying “I \*haven’t \*found a Black/Asian/White person I find attractive enough to be in a relationship with” and “I _don’t_ find Black/… people attractive enough to be in a relationship with” However, if your reason is that you don’t want the hassle because other people would frown on it, then you’re not a racist. Just a coward. ---
**Author:** ![Onomatopoeia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/onomatopoeia/32/4145_2.png) [@Onomatopoeia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Onomatopoeia)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2011, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735/59 "2011-05-13T17:00:54Z")
> [@China\_Guy](#): > > Now if someone says “I like Asian women because they are docile, subservient and shag like a minx” that’s a racial stereotype (and waaaaaaaay off base if my 25 years in Asia is anything to go by and shows an amaziing level of ignorance). I wasn’t aware that shagging like a minx is an Asian stereotype. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2011, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735/60 "2011-05-13T17:06:49Z")
> [@Shakester](#): > > The simplest example is sex tourists: going to a poor country to sexually exploit the locals? Creepy, horrible, and deeply racist. What if you’re going to a poor country where the people are your own “race”, like Japanese going to Thailand or whatever? Still creepy and horrible, yes, but racist? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-being-opposed-to-interracial-relations-necessarilly-racist/581735.md?page=4)