Here’s the problem. When I was 27, my life collapsed into a shambles, and gambling had nothing to do with it. The proximate cause was a hurricane; primary causes were an emotionally abusive father and an even more abusive high school experience which left me with untreated severe clinical depression and pretty much negative self-esteem. Also, I’ll remind you that my boyfriend’s buddy managed to go pretty heavily into debt without, literally, getting within a thousand miles of a casino or any other form of legal gambling. His life, too became a shambles, one worse than mine, but that was for reasons unrelated to gambling, but completely related to stupidity. I’d tell you why, but I don’t quite believe it myself and I know him. Suffice it to say it involved a trunk full of grenades and federal prison time.
Self-limiting? I don’t buy it. I’ve worked with people who play the state run Daily Number every day. As I said, it pays 500-1 on a 1,000-1 bet. On a daily basis, it’s as sure a money loser as there is. I’ve seen people buy 10 squares on the football pool at work to ensure a win, but the best they’ll do is break even. I know why they’re doing it, or at least one reason. A lot of these people have been ordinary, blue collar guys. The only way they can see striking it rich is buy winning the lottery and, when I’ve bought a ticket for the local lottery which runs into millions of dollars, I’ve known full well I’m buying a dollar’s worth of dreams. To fantasize about quitting a job you hate, travel, have nice things, or simply not worry about how you’re going to pay the bills is well worth a dollar or even five to me and I’m sure that’s true of the guys I see doing that.
As I said in my first post, I’ve played backgammon with my uncle for British pounds and with the gentleman I’m seeing for Ghirardelli chocolate. begbert, is there a moral difference in these actions to you? I don’t think I’ve ever risked more than $20 USD at a time gambling, and that number’s high. The one time I went to Casino Niagara, I didn’t have enough money to spare on me to try blackjack, so I threw a bit of money into a one-armed bandit, expecting to take a loss. Instead, I won more than I’d spent and walked away with a big grin on my face and yes, a certain amount of pride.
The distinction you’re drawing is, to me, an artificial one. I love the theater and music. There’s nothing stopping me from running up credit card debts buying tickets to plays and concerts except my own conscience telling me I can’t afford it. People are appalled by how easy it is to run up debt buying cars or clothes or meals in restaurants. I could, if I chose, go into debt by going to a knitting shop and buying cashmere and mohair wool to make into things to give to friends or charity. The only limit would be my credit limit, and believe me, I’ve worked with mohair – it’s wonderful stuff to work with, but very expensive. If the quantity of mohair wool I can buy is limited only by my credit limit and the knitting store owner is encouraging me to buy the expensive stuff (they do you know; I know of one who looks down on me because I don’t buy the expensive stuff), is knitting, then, a social ill?
We know for a fact that people become alcoholics and that they drive drunk and kill or injure people. A couple of years ago, I saw that myself when the man two cars ahead of me, high on alcohol, valium, and cocaine, crossed the center line and plowed into a minivan carrying a family of 5 to an evening out. I was subpoenaed to testify at his hearing. My state’s got strict laws about the sale of alcohol, although ironically, those laws make it illegal to buy just one bottle of beer. America tried outlawing alcohol once; the results were worse.
People who are stone sober drive irresponsibly and endanger people, yet we don’t hear driving called a social ill.
I’m a hybrid. Even though I was raised here in the US, I was born in England and I’ve got some rather European attitudes. The British, at least, are far less uptight about gambling, and yet, I don’t think British society compares adversely to American. It’d be interesting to see which country has a higher rate of people who are addicted to gambling.
Come to think of it, wasn’t there a time when educating women was considered a social ill? I think it was something about their ovaries drying up and education rendering them unfit wives and mothers.
CJ