Get over yourself.
I sympathize with people who don’t find such phrases funny, and those who would rather not hear them. And I think it’s OK of them to say so.
Granted, expecting people to guard their language may not work, and merely pointing it out could open one to criticism.
However, I don’t need to use casual allusions to terrible events and situations to express other events and situations, and would like to notice and avoid doing so.
Your comment gave me cancer,
Actually, I’ve had cancer for 9 years, but your comment gave me cancer again.
I almost mentioned this one example, I think using the word “rape” in casual speech like that has the impact of desensitizing society to sexual violence. It’s not because it could be triggering but because I think it makes assault more likely to occur and victims less likely to be taken seriously.
I don’t think that applies to many other things.
(I don’t mind 'I sure got fucked in the ass on that deal" but “the dealer raped me” makes me cringe. I’m not sure why the discrepancy.)
Your response gave me pause, and I’m not even a cat.
I’ve noticed a growing tendency, in real life and on this board, of people going out of their way to be offended at any- and everything. And anyone who disagrees can kiss my wiener.
Recently in my YNAB Facebook group a blind lady posted about her difficulty getting more accessibility options in the software - she kept getting the customer service runaround, which led to some outrage (including on my part) and someone decided to start a petition.
Some poor sap joked, “You better make sure that petition is super accessible!” and oh my God you’d think he’d kicked the woman down the stairs.
One lady asked him how he could have so much hate in his heart to mock the disabled.
I can’t with these people.
I wonder what Redd Foxx would say if you told him his most offensive joke was his fake heart attack routine.
Similar. I had a heart attack about five years ago and had to be resuscitated two times on the way from the ER to the Cath Lab. I joke about it all the time. I refer to it as when I got rebooted or that time I died… twice…
In the ICU, I overheard my cardiologist refer to me as “a bad Scrubs cliché” while he was on rounds. I think he was a little embarrassed that I’d heard that; I thought it was funny.
My wife is not as amused by all this, as she had to stand there and watch, whereas I wasn’t even there. As a result, I try to be careful about how I phrase things around her so as not to make her uncomfortable. That’s a question of reading the room, not banning a common phrase simply somebody, hypothetically might have a bad association with it.
The same doesn’t go for rape expressions, IMO. I’ve purged those from my lexicon.
Well, there WAS George Carlin’s joke about Porky Pig raping Elmer Fudd. I do think that’s really the only rape joke I’ve found genuinely funny.
But that was George Carlin. He could make anything funny.
That’d be a good reason not to use expressions like that. It didn’t turn out well.
My father died following a heart attack and it doesn’t bother me to hear people say things like, “You almost gave me a heart attack!” Hell, I started a thread about this almost 20 years ago to the month in the BBQ Pit (weakest pitting ever). The world doesn’t revolve around our personal tragedies. While it’s perfectly okay for you to have a negative reaction I don’t believe the other person was being insensitive. I think you’re being overly sensitive.
That’s an appropriate response to Jeff Dunham, regardless of topic.
I have a cousin four years younger than me that, due to the hospital staff’s negligence, ended up being sent home from the hospital with undiagnosed/untreated spina bifida with hydrocephalus that caused severe brain damage before it was caught by a pediatrician at her first baby visit. Shelly doesn’t walk or talk.
Instead of thinking someone is insensitive or slurring my family when they claim something caused them to be speechless, I realize that they have no idea that Shelly can’t talk and likely don’t know my cousin even exists.
So yes…you’re probably being too sensitive. Even if the person talking to you knows your dad died, I guarantee most of them don’t recall how. I know a ton of work and online acquaintances who know my parents died relatively young fairly recently and don’t remember how.
One of my school friends father was blind and my friend complained all the time how his father always bought paint to paint the walls in their house. The colors were ghastly.
Tought me about how to behave with blind persons. Always warn them if something is going to cause loud noise.
About unsensitive jokes: I was in my local health care facilty waiting my turn when two guys went by transfering a movable coat hanger with lots of wirehangers hanging there. I asked: “Going to the abortion clinic?”
Everybody, including staff, except one old nurse, started laughing.
I used to hang out on another board where people commonly made murder-suicide jokes. The typical example would be something like, when someone complained about a family event they didn’t want to go to, someone else would suggest murder-suicide. Then a close friend lost his sister when his bother in law committed murder-suicide.
I posted about it, and asked if people could avoid the murder-suicide jokes for a couple of weeks. I got a little bit of flack, but there were no murder-suicide jokes for a couple of weeks.
Maybe I was unreasonably sensitive.
Interesting. The former bothers me more, and it’s because I read it as homophobic. Haha, how horrible for a man to be a bottom, rather than as a rape joke.
I’m not a huge fan of rape jokes, either. But like the heart attack joke, they are acknowledging something that we all agree is horrible as horrible, and don’t bother me as much.
Surprisingly, I agree. Nobody wants a heart attack, and these statements merely confirm that fact. But the “in the ass” statements imply that such so awful that no man, at least, would ever want that. I’ve always thought they were homophobic, but nothing is ever said about them.