Well…maybe. I’m like you were. I can’t sing, at least in part because I’m a bit tone deaf (I can’t tell apart two tones if they’re close enough). I’d like to sing, I’d have liked playing the guitar (the latter in fact would be much easier). But, that’s true, I’m not going to devote my life to be able to sing like almost everybody else can naturally.
I’m sure there are plenty of things I’ve no talent for I could learn to do not very well without dedicating a decade or to to it. Still, I wish I could sing, and I’m frustrated.
Regarding the girl in the OP, the problem seems to be that the parents are deluded too. Does she even have a coach? Or is all the family believing that one can become a professional singer without any training?
She wants to become a professional singer, apparently. So, no difference with the engineer. And in she wanted to become an engineer, I’m sure her parents would have her receive training (going to college/uni) while I’m unconvinced she’s being taught how to sing.
Last I checked, being a poor musician doesn’t directly cause people to die. Just singing a lot can teach one a hell of a lot about singing without killing anyone. Freelance engineering, not so much. If she’s lazy and just wants to be a star, autotune works wonders. Plus, she can always just sell her soul to the devil. I’ve heard that works well.
It isn’t wrong to encourage them, but it is wrong to pretend they are so much better than they are. That will actually discourage them from doing what is necessary to become good.
On the other hand, your parents are not American Idol judges and it’s not their job to give you devastatingly unsparing assessments of your creative attempts.
Your parents’ job is to help you find the guidance of others who will provide devastatingly unsparing assessments of your creative attempts. Teachers and coaches, directors holding auditions, judges at competitions, and so on.
Those are the people who should be telling it like it is, while your proud parents constantly repeat, “Honey, you were wonderful!!”
Stage parents whose warped ambition makes them relentlessly critique and nag and scold their children towards stardom are even worse than overprotective parents who refuse to let anybody else breathe a word of criticism to their fondly indulged darlings.
I’m with Kimstu. A performer with an “overcoming” story is more inspirational to me than a naturally talented one.
Few of us have natural talents. But almost all of us can work hard. Imagine how awesome we could all be if we stopped defining our abilities based on how we were as kids and kept learning new skills throughout our lifetimes.
Lauryn Hill, who unfortunately is going to jail for not paying taxes, undeniably has a fantastic voice. But when she was a teenager, she was booed off the stage at Apollo. I’m so glad she didn’t let that discourage her.
All musicians start off rather crappily. If not for encouraging parents, most early musicians would give up at the sound of their lame efforts.
But yeah, THOSE parents should be horsewhipped for letting that girl mangle the anthem like that (I hadn’t listened to it when I posted earlier). As Martin Lawrence would say, she wasn’t a little Mariah Carey. She was a little Mariah Scarey! I’m starting to think that there should be a certificate you have to earn before you’re allowed to sing that song in public.
My feeling, too. It’s possible that she might develop into something good (but unlikely, simply because it’s unlikely for everyone), but she needs training from a good voice teacher. Thinking she’s of professional quality is not going to help her in the slightest.
It boils down to a rule I heard about writing, which applies to any art: If you only notice what you’re doing well, you’ll never succeed. If you only notice what you’re doing wrong, then there’s hope for you. The girl and her parents only seem to notice what she does well (and their standard of that is biased). Until she learns to improve on what’s not working, she’ll never advance.
I’m not hearing the same as you. I fast-forwarded to 1:30, and it still sounds just as, um, “pitchy,” to put it mildly. She gets closer to being on track during the “O, say does that star-spangled banner” part, though.
That said, I admire her enthusiasm and courage in singing in front of a large crowd, especially as an 11 year old. She doesn’t seem to have much “natural” talent in regards to pitch perception, but I think a lot of that can be overcome with a good voice coach. I certainly wouldn’t stop her from singing as a parent, but I would invest in lessons if she wants to further explore her passion to set her on the right track, at least, and give her some honest criticism and encouragement.
Don’t get me wrong. It’s far from a stellar performance, and she needs to work hard for a long time, but it’s a lot less of a train wreck after the first minute.
A music teacher I once had told us that he had had a pupil who wanted to take violin lessons. The problem was that he was an awful singer who couldn’t hit the right tones even if his life depended on it. In the end it turned out that he became real good, so he had music in him and a good ear, but it just didn’t get to his vocal system.
Yeah, I know plenty of musicians who do have a good ear, but can’t sing for shit. I have a reasonable ear, and when I listen to a recording of myself sing, I cringe, but I know that I’m way off on pitches. I just can’t control them or hear them while I’m singing, for some reason. I don’t think this is particularly unusual.
I agree- learning to do things well that you weren’t originally good at builds character and confidence. So does learning that you’re not that good at it, despite all your effort.
I think an important parental role is gently pointing out when something should be best done as a hobby, and when it can realistically be more than that. Hopefully the appropriate competition will reveal this to the kid, but there are enough kids who don’t realize that when they never win a competition and don’t even place, so there’s a parental role for a lot of them to point this out.
I work in the arts and education, and can say that there are fine, fine lines between making a kid want to quit, encouraging her to continue to strive and enjoy herself, and making her think that she is the next Miley Cyrus when she is most definitely not.
And, parents almost always have an over-inflated concept of their child’s talent in relation to the kid’s peers.
Checking out her bio on her reverbnation page, it’s apparent that she (and/or her parents) have an amazingly out-of-proportion perspective on how talented she is and what her current abilities say about her chances of “superstardom.”
I also admit to getting a very bad taste in my mouth when I see any elementary-aged kid with professional glamour/headshots.
Encouraging someone to continue and improve is definitely appropriate. The parents aren’t helping, because they’re already working on her “career” when they should be helping her work on her skills.
A professional website and a regular touring schedule including restaurants and stadiums suggests that the parents are putting in a lot of effort and expense in the wrong direction when it comes to helping the kid develop musically. Looks like beauty pageant parents in another guise.
A respected, local voice teacher I know flat out will not accept students younger than 13-14, because before that, in most cases, their voices just aren’t ready for it.
OTOH, there are 11-year-olds, and then there are 11-year-olds: