# Is It Becoming Socially Acceptable To Say You Are Not Religious? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 23, 2009, 8:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441 "2009-03-23T08:37:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2009, 12:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441/21 "2009-03-23T12:40:33Z")
Boy I don’t know. I’ve never hidden my beliefs or lack thereof and can’t recall having run into any situations where it didn’t seem socially acceptable. Not even among the more religious folk that I know. ---
**Author:** ![legalsnugs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/45deac/32.png) [@legalsnugs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/legalsnugs)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2009, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441/22 "2009-03-23T13:36:57Z")
> [@Jinx](#): > > In light of recent economic times, stats show church attendence is rising. [No, they don’t.](http://pewforum.org/docs/?DocID=405) ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2009, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441/23 "2009-03-23T13:39:55Z")
I’ve always lived in the Bible Belt. Baptist seems to be the default setting around here. At work, people send glurgey religious emails, have religious decorations at their workstations, talk about what happened at church, have Christian rock songs as their ringtones, say things like, “have a blessed day” etc. Usually I just keep my mouth shut on that topic. Once a lady sent me some glurge that really rubbed me the wrong way (“I’m sending this to you because I know you’re a Christian!”) and I answered her, “Actually I’m an atheist.” She didn’t speak to me for about a year afterward. _shrug_ If anyone asked me straight out about my beliefs, I’d tell them, but really they just assume and I let them. I hope no one ever asks, because I do think the truth would strain my work relationships. ---
**Author:** ![Llama\_Llogophile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@Llama\_Llogophile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Llama_Llogophile)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2009, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441/24 "2009-03-23T14:08:56Z")
I’m in the U.S. and I never felt it was socially not acceptable to say I’m not religious. Of course, I don’t live in the Bible belt… ---
**Author:** ![alphaboi867](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alphaboi867/32/3898_2.png) [@alphaboi867](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alphaboi867)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2009, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441/25 "2009-03-23T14:29:37Z")
> [@FinnAgain](#): > > That’s probably because there are plenty of atheist Jews. In general, to be an “ex-Jew”, you have to have converted to another region. Nope, even then you’re still technically a Jew and if you’re a lady all your children will be as well. ---
**Author:** ![Antigen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/848f3c/32.png) [@Antigen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antigen)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2009, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441/26 "2009-03-23T14:51:35Z")
A huge number of my coworkers are very involved in whatever churches they go to. We’ve got some Catholics and some members of a half dozen assorted Protestant faiths. My nonreligiousness has never been an issue, really. Some coworkers inquired about my religious affiliation when I first started working there, but it was more to help steer me to an appropriate church, since I was new to the area. Just trying to be nice and help the new girl get settled, I think. They also asked what kind of food I like, to tell me which restaurants to try. When I told them I was “Catholic” but not really all that practicing anymore, they found me the names of a couple local churches and then never brought it up again. I’ve been invited to a few church functions (of all types, not just Catholic) and I decline politely and I’m never pressed about it. I do feel a little uncomfortable sometimes, walking out to my [Evolve-fish](http://www.evolvefish.com/fish/media/E-Evolve.gif)-adorned car in a parking lot full of Jesus-fishes, but nobody ever makes a big deal of it. I suspect a few of them may be praying for my poor lost soul, but I’m ok with that. We don’t get into huge religious discussions at work, and I think that’s probably best for everyone. ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2009, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441/27 "2009-03-23T14:51:50Z")
> [@FinnAgain](#): > > That’s probably because there are plenty of atheist Jews. In general, to be an “ex-Jew”, you have to have converted to another region. Don’t forget, “Jewish” is an ethnic identity as well as a religious one. Just like you can still be an Italian without practicing the Catholic religion, some people who no longer practice the Jewish religion still say they are Jews because they still identify with Judaism as an ethnic group. ---
**Author:** ![Kyla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/eada6e/32.png) [@Kyla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyla)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2009, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441/28 "2009-03-23T15:27:47Z")
> [@Mach Tuck](#): > > I’m in the U.S. and I never felt it was socially not acceptable to say I’m not religious. Of course, I don’t live in the Bible belt… This, exactly. Most of the people I speak with on a daily basis are my classmates, and we all communicate by Facebook quite a bit. I have “atheist” listed as my religion on my Facebook page and I certainly haven’t had any problems with it. (At least, none that I can’t handle. A few months ago at a party, a Catholic friend of mine got really drunk and decided that I had to believe in god. He told me he would work on me until I believed in something. I told him basically that if he wanted to remain friends, he should STFU about it. He’s never broached the topic again while sober, so I’m over it.) Religion very rarely comes up as a topic in my circle of acquaintances. OTOH, we happily talk about politics all the time. ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2009, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441/29 "2009-03-23T15:42:32Z")
> [@Marienee](#): > > Here in the Netherlands, if you say you _are_ religious or that you believe in any higher being, they politely step back a few paces, then find something else to do. > > Possibly this reaction is reserved for foreign + religious. According to the relevant Wikipedia entry: > [@](#): > > According to the most recent Eurobarometer Poll 2005, 34% of Dutch citizens responded that “they believe there is a god”, whereas 37% answered that “they believe there is some sort of spirit or life force” and 27% that “they do not believe there is any sort of spirit, god, or life force”. ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2009, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441/30 "2009-03-23T15:43:37Z")
> [@DMark](#): > > In recent stories in the press, there was a new study showing more people are NOT going to churches (or other houses of worship), nor do they claim to be affiliated with any religion. In addition, many are now freely admitting they do not have any strong religious beliefs whatsoever. I’ve been saying that since the early 1960s. And given the number of people who annoy me with religion on a daily basis, I haven’t seen much decrease. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2009, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441/31 "2009-03-23T15:57:31Z")
I was just discussing this at the weekend with a friend. We remarked that in the circles in which we move (I in Oxford, he in London), nobody feels the need to express their atheism in daily life, because it’s the default assumption. Furthermore if someone is even suspected of being religious, particularly Christian (presumably because from the right wing, “well you’d expect that sort of thing from Johnny Foreigner” or on the left of the spectrum “it’s OK because it’s ethnic”), it’s treated as something quite odd. People drop their voice and say “She’s very nice, but I think she’s a _Christian_.” Recently a guy at my work took voluntary redundancy because “that’s the sort of sacrifice Jesus would have made”, and sent a farewell email telling us all to turn to God. I admire what he did, greatly, but the overblown martyrdom with which he expressed his decision made me and everyone else have to suppress laughter - and when we were down the pub, entirely fail to suppress it. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2009, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441/32 "2009-03-23T16:10:38Z")
I think it’s not as big a deal as it was 20-25 years ago (and I think the internet has something to do with it), and I think it also has to do with where you are geographically. In Minneapolis, nobody cares, but in rural Lousiana, you should probably still keep your mouth shut. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2009, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441/33 "2009-03-23T16:21:53Z")
There is quite a large difference between “not religious” and “atheist” or even “agnostic”. The first is far more socially acceptable than the other two, IMO, because it doesn’t actually challenge the concept of a supreme being. ---
**Author:** ![ianzin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/ed655f/32.png) [@ianzin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ianzin)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2009, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441/34 "2009-03-23T16:27:40Z")
As far as my own experience goes, it has always been perfectly socially acceptable to say that I am an atheist. Why on earth should it not be? ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2009, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441/35 "2009-03-23T16:33:58Z")
Is the OP kidding? Depending on your social circles, it may be far LESS objectionable to be non-religious than to be a devout Christian. That’s one of the things I’ve always found amusing about guys like Richard Dawkins and Sam Harris. They live and work in academia, where they almost NEVER encounter ANYONE who’s even tepidly religious! It makes me want to ask (in Quentin Tarantino’s words), “Are you such a loser that you can’t see when you’ve WON???” ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2009, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441/36 "2009-03-23T16:43:28Z")
> [@ianzin](#): > > As far as my own experience goes, it has always been perfectly socially acceptable to say that I am an atheist. Why on earth should it not be? It’s not always a problem in America, but I’ve certainly got a lot of negative reaction from saying it. A lot of people equate atheism with immorality. I don’t know how many times I’ve heard a response like, “Oh you can’t be an atheist. You’re a nice guy, and you seem to have a moral code. You’re not **really** an atheist.” Yes, it’s pretty mind boggling. But this happens, frequently. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2009, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441/37 "2009-03-23T17:15:48Z")
> [@astorian](#): > > Is the OP kidding? > > Depending on your social circles, it may be far LESS objectionable to be non-religious than to be a devout Christian. Trying to shrink the question down to “social circles” is facile. The question is about social acceptance on a larger scale, not just whether it’s acceptable to your buddies. It’s pretty obvious that Christian religious sensibilities still dominate US culture and atheists are still largely seen as a disreputable minority (as evidenced by surveys and polls showing that most Americans think that atheists lack moral values and would never vote for them for public office). > [@](#): > > That’s one of the things I’ve always found amusing about guys like Richard Dawkins and Sam Harris. They live and work in academia, where they almost NEVER encounter ANYONE who’s even tepidly religious! It makes me want to ask (in Quentin Tarantino’s words), “Are you such a loser that you can’t see when you’ve WON???” What makes you think people in academia aren’t religious? Scientists don’t tend to be, but hard sciences are just one part of academia. Plus Dawkins is an evolutionary biologist which means he can’t avoid religionists. Part of why he’s become so cantankerous about it comes from years of defending science from attacks by Fundamentalist Christians. To say that he never encounters anybody religious is to show that you know nothing about his career. ---
**Author:** ![delphica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9a140/32.png) [@delphica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/delphica)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2009, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441/38 "2009-03-23T17:52:55Z")
Here in NYC, it’s been socially acceptable to not be religious for my entire adult life. It’s mostly okay to say you’re religious as well, although I feel sometimes that when I start with religious, other people are disappointed that it turns out I am “only” Catholic instead of a cool, exotic religion. In my next life (see, it’s a joke) I’m going to be a Zoroastrian or a Land School Buddhist. Where my inlaws are, in Oklahoma, I’m not so sure. I, a religious person, am FREAKED OUT by how much religion is everywhere, and by “religion,” I mean “Christianity.” It’s way too much PDR (public displays of religion) for my taste. I’m always like “People! Keep it in your pants!” you know? ---
**Author:** ![shiftless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9c0ed/32.png) [@shiftless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shiftless)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2009, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441/39 "2009-03-23T18:29:18Z")
I would say it is more acceptable today than it was 30 years ago. I can generally get away with saying “I’m not religious” without getting many comments from people these days. Of course, the only reason the subject would be part of a conversation would be because the other person asked about my religion. On the other hand, I’ve gotten some very negative comments when people found out I just plan old didn’t believe there was a God. This apparently equates to saying “I’ve given up keeping any kind of moral code.” From the guy yelling at me “What keeps you from just killing or robbing people?” to the sublime “You white boys don’t even believe in God. I’m going to save you before I retire.” At work in my U.S. government job no less. ---
**Author:** ![PeskiPiksi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e495f1/32.png) [@PeskiPiksi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PeskiPiksi)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2009, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441/40 "2009-03-23T18:32:42Z")
Yep, Oklahoman here and it’s definitely wise to pick and choose when to be open about your lack of belief. Like a month or two ago when I was at Target and chit-chatting with the cashier about my daughter, and I made the comment about how lucky I was to have such a laid-back, cheerful baby. The lady actually had the nerve to correct me…“No, dear…you’re _blessed_ to have her. Never forget who gave her to you.” It was the end of the transaction and I was a little taken off-guard, so I just kind of shrugged it off and left. Of course, I thought of all kinds of witty replies later, like “Yep, my husband banged me a good one that night!” or something. But the point is, she felt comfortable assuming I was a Christian, and I felt uncomfortable correcting her. That’s just the atmosphere here. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-becoming-socially-acceptable-to-say-you-are-not-religious/490441.md?page=3)