# Is it creepy for brother and sister to cuddle on the couch? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 19, 2015, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394 "2015-03-19T16:26:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![leftfield6](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leftfield6/32/18780_2.png) [@leftfield6](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/leftfield6)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2015, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394/41 "2015-03-20T16:00:25Z")
> [@CaptainAmerica\_1987](#): > > That’s why I’m happy to only have had brothers not sisters! Not that there is anything wrong with that. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![DigitalC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ebca7d/32.png) [@DigitalC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DigitalC)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2015, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394/42 "2015-03-20T16:02:10Z")
That’s not poisoning the well, that’s just giving an accurate description. ---
**Author:** ![Death\_of\_Rats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a6a055/32.png) [@Death\_of\_Rats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Death_of_Rats)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2015, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394/43 "2015-03-20T16:21:08Z")
Sitting like the picture you showed, I would not find it creepy. I have a much younger cousin who will sit like this on me to this day (I am 43, she is 27). We have always been very close and she has had a pretty rough life, so I have always been a source of comfort and safety to her. Additionally, my daughter and her are just as close and will coddle the same way with my cousin. For us, there is no sexual component to the affection. We just are able to draw comfort and love from each other. The additional elements you added may push it more towards the creepy factor, but just being physically comfortable with family that you love would not be creepy in and of itself. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2015, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394/44 "2015-03-20T16:49:09Z")
When my sister (44) and I (52) sit on the sofa together at family events it quickly devolves into a slap fight/wrestling match and it has been this way for more than almost 40 years. This is more or less playful, but annoying and weird to everyone else, so we are usually instructed not to sit together. For the record, she started it. Always. ---
**Author:** ![BobLibDem](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boblibdem/32/3149_2.png) [@BobLibDem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BobLibDem)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2015, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394/45 "2015-03-20T17:06:59Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > I omitted this part from my OP because I didn’t want to poison the well. > > His hands were rubbing up and down the sides of her (upper) arms. Most people don’t find upper arms to be sensual so it remains only moderately creepy to me. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2015, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394/46 "2015-03-20T17:14:22Z")
I find it creepy. Were they drinking Folgers? ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2015, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394/47 "2015-03-20T17:17:16Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > I find it creepy. > > Were they drinking Folgers? _“We’ve replaced the fine coffee he usually drinks with Folger’s crystals…and he probably won’t notice, because we also replaced the fine chick who usually sits between his legs with his sister…”_ ---
**Author:** ![Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slow_moving_vehicle/32/291_2.png) [@Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slow_Moving_Vehicle)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2015, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394/48 "2015-03-20T17:36:57Z")
“My father used to say that playing not to win is like sleeping with your sister. Sure, she’s a great piece of tail, with a blouse full of goodies, but it’s just illegal…Kids who do nothing but play the banjo…eat applesauce through a straw…pork farm animals.” - Topper Harley. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2015, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394/49 "2015-03-20T20:24:09Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > I omitted this part from my OP because I didn’t want to poison the well. > > His hands were rubbing up and down the sides of her (upper) arms. I missed that the first time through. Yeah, creepy unless they drink Folgers. ---
**Author:** ![robert\_columbia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e79b87/32.png) [@robert\_columbia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robert_columbia)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2015, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394/50 "2015-03-20T22:34:19Z")
> [@Push\_You\_Down](#): > > Not necessarily creepy. > > I think it’s weird that we’re at a point in our culture where physical closeness is seen as inherently sexual. The Sia Elastic Heart video and the ensuing “outrage” and apologies that came out of it is a good example of this. Good point. Not that long ago, people could have their hands all over each other without it meaning anything romantic. Examples from old books: In [The Mill on the Floss](http://www.gutenberg.org/files/6688/6688-h/6688-h.htm), the main characters, a big brother and a little sister, drown in a storm surge. Shortly afterward, their bodies “were found in close embrace” [Tom Brown’s Schooldays](http://www.gutenberg.org/files/1480/1480-h/1480-h.htm) is full of high school boys who just love holding hands with each other and providing nurturing cuddles for emotional support. At one point, one of the boys receives hugs from the _principal_ and then goes and tells it to another boy without any shame or embarrassment whatsoever. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2015, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394/51 "2015-03-20T22:45:05Z")
> [@robert\_columbia](#): > > Good point. > > Not that long ago, people could have their hands all over each other without it meaning anything romantic. > > Examples from old books: > > In [The Mill on the Floss](http://www.gutenberg.org/files/6688/6688-h/6688-h.htm), the main characters, a big brother and a little sister, > > drown in a storm surge. Shortly afterward, their bodies “were found in close embrace” > > [Tom Brown’s Schooldays](http://www.gutenberg.org/files/1480/1480-h/1480-h.htm) is full of high school boys who just love holding hands with each other and providing nurturing cuddles for emotional support. At one point, one of the boys receives hugs from the _principal_ and then goes and tells it to another boy without any shame or embarrassment whatsoever. I take your point, but I think it’s important to note: All cuddles are not created equal. Some types of cuddles are different than others. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2015, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394/52 "2015-03-20T23:30:22Z")
> [@GreenElf](#): > > The photo wasn’t creepy for brother-sister, but you described something else where her behind is planted on his crotch, if I understand correctly. This. I voted on the fence. I would have said the picture is not creepy. ---
**Author:** ![Kamino\_Neko](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kamino_neko/32/34_2.png) [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2015, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394/53 "2015-03-20T23:42:02Z")
> [@MoonMoon](#): > > I think it’s the “between the legs” bit that put it over the top for me. I know it is. General cuddling, I wouldn’t think anything of. But in a position where she can’t help but be up against his junk…well, I’m still not sure ‘creepy’ is the right word, but it’s definitely weird. ---
**Author:** ![davethehammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davethehammer/32/7317_2.png) [@davethehammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davethehammer)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2015, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394/54 "2015-03-21T00:28:20Z")
> [@](#): > > Is it creepy for brother and sister to cuddle on the couch? yes. Next question ---
**Author:** ![Rachellelogram](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rachellelogram/32/8689_2.png) [@Rachellelogram](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rachellelogram)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2015, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394/55 "2015-03-21T03:35:03Z")
Gender shouldn’t (IMO) be a factor when siblings are involved. I wouldn’t be creeped out if 2 sisters or 2 brothers were doing this, so I really don’t find it squicky if a brother and sister are doing this. Family’s family. ---
**Author:** ![Napier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ce73a5/32.png) [@Napier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Napier)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2015, 10:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394/56 "2015-03-21T10:58:37Z")
I definitely think “not creepy” but also that it could become creepy in a moment. My experience is only with one opposite sex sibling, and that was only during childhood, but there was definitely no attraction there. If we had ever sat like that, attraction wouldn’t have been a factor. The lack of attraction between siblings makes the whole thing safe, like having a cat in your lap (assuming you and the cat are just friends). Of course, if there was attraction there, then it shifts everything. Romance between siblings doesn’t necessarily creep me out but it raises loads of questions at least. Butt next to crotch isn’t an automatic issue. It depends on how exactly the proximity came to be. Riding a motorcycle together is not the same as hot doggie-style sex, after all. I am saddened that our culture gets so quickly concerned by these things. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2015, 11:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394/57 "2015-03-21T11:41:00Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > I omitted this part from my OP because I didn’t want to poison the well. > > His hands were rubbing up and down the sides of her (upper) arms. How long did you observe them? Was he giving her a backrub? That actually makes it less creepy for me, but then, I hang out with a lot of massage therapists. Straddling someone is really the only practical way to give them a back/arm rub when you’re on a couch. I wouldn’t make much judgement based on their body position, so much as I would on their facial expressions and reaction to being seen. If they look startled or guilty, or jump apart when you walk into the room, of course it’s creepy. If they carry on with an observer, I’m far less concerned that anything inappropriate is going on. ---
**Author:** ![Octarine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/22d042/32.png) [@Octarine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Octarine)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2015, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394/58 "2015-03-22T00:51:14Z")
I think the problem here is half the people are responding to the picture, and half to the description given. The picture is probably not creepy, though it could be borderline. But what **Shakes** writes is that the sister’s butt is _between her brothers legs_, with the brother _rubbing her upper arms_. When’s the wedding? ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2015, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394/59 "2015-03-22T01:24:28Z")
> [@Octarine](#): > > I think the problem here is half the people are responding to the picture, and half to the description given. The picture is probably not creepy, though it could be borderline. But what **Shakes** writes is that the sister’s butt is _between her brothers legs_, with the brother _rubbing her upper arms_. When’s the wedding? Thank you! That’s been driving me batty! I thought I was pretty clear in my OP that the bro/sis team were not actually sitting like the couple in the picture but much more intimately. ---
**Author:** ![Alley\_Dweller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alley_dweller/32/430_2.png) [@Alley\_Dweller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alley_Dweller)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2015, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394/60 "2015-03-22T02:20:46Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > Thank you! That’s been driving me batty! I thought I was pretty clear in my OP that the bro/sis team were not actually sitting like the couple in the picture but much more intimately. Yeah, I really didn’t want to say anything, but I agree that the picture, rather than the description, seems to be what a lot of people are reacting to. I assume you had trouble finding picture of an appropriately posed couple? Here are some that I am assuming are what you meant: [http://www.nouveaudating.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/couple-snuggling-on-the-couch-being-all-cutesy-390x260.jpg](http://www.nouveaudating.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/couple-snuggling-on-the-couch-being-all-cutesy-390x260.jpg) [http://cdn.rowellphoto.com/wedding/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/couple-cuddling-by-fire.jpg](http://cdn.rowellphoto.com/wedding/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/couple-cuddling-by-fire.jpg) [![](https://maeclair.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/bigstock-happy-couple-near-fireplace-28635941.jpg?w=409&h=272) ](https://maeclair.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/bigstock-happy-couple-near-fireplace-28635941.jpg?w=409&h=272) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-creepy-for-brother-and-sister-to-cuddle-on-the-couch/715394.md?page=4)