# Is it impolite to refuse to share your umbrella with a stranger when it's raining? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 13, 2013, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930 "2013-06-13T21:29:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![DCnDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dcndc/32/2842_2.png) [@DCnDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DCnDC)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2013, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930/61 "2013-06-15T00:10:35Z")
Pouring rain? Sure, you can huddle under here with me if you want. Already drenched? Why bother, you ain’t gettin’ any drier under here. Light rain/drizzle? You’re on your own. Unless… are you hot? Come on over! How _you_ doin’? ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2013, 12:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930/62 "2013-06-15T00:18:52Z")
Weird as hell to ask. I’d think you might be a pickpocket. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2013, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930/63 "2013-06-15T00:21:53Z")
> [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](#): > > Good grief, yes, you should share. It’s the good old Golden Rule. Huh? We are following the golden rule. We would never share an umbrella with a stranger, so we don’t ask strangers to share umbrellas with us. We don’t want to share an umbrella with a stranger, whether the umbrella is ours or theirs. Nearly every comment in this thread is about how weird it is to want to share an umbrella with a stranger. By not sharing, we are doing what we would want others to do for us. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2013, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930/64 "2013-06-15T02:56:15Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > We don’t want to share an umbrella with a stranger, whether the umbrella is ours or theirs. Nearly every comment in this thread is about how weird it is to want to share an umbrella with a stranger. By not sharing, we are doing what we would want others to do for us. We don’t want to share an umbrella with a stranger, whether the umbrella is ours or theirs. Nearly every comment in this thread is about how weird it is to want to share an umbrella with a stranger. By not sharing, we are doing what we would want others to do for us. We don’t want to share an umbrella with a stranger, whether the umbrella is ours or theirs. Nearly every comment in this thread is about how weird it is to want to share an umbrella with a stranger. By not sharing, we are doing what we would want others to do for us. We don’t want to share an umbrella with a stranger, whether the umbrella is ours or theirs. Nearly every comment in this thread is about how weird it is to want to share an umbrella with a stranger. By not sharing, we are doing what we would want others to do for us. We don’t want to share an umbrella with a stranger, whether the umbrella is ours or theirs. Nearly every comment in this thread is about how weird it is to want to share an umbrella with a stranger. By not sharing, we are doing what we would want others to do for us. Was it _The Outer Limits_ or an episode of _Star Trek_ where the computer begins smoking after repeatedly saying something similar, although possibly not about umbrellas. Maybe an Asimov story? ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2013, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930/65 "2013-06-15T03:00:56Z")
I don’t know, but I know my brain is smoking just reading it. ---
**Author:** ![CookingWithGas](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cookingwithgas/32/485_2.png) [@CookingWithGas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CookingWithGas)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2013, 3:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930/66 "2013-06-15T03:10:50Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Was it _The Outer Limits_ or an episode of _Star Trek_ where the computer begins smoking after repeatedly saying something similar, although possibly not about umbrellas. Maybe an Asimov story? There was a Star Trek episode, [“I, Mudd”](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzVxsYzXI_Y) (1:25), where Harcourt Fenton Mudd and Kirk were talking to an android who was a manifestation of a powerful computer. Kirk said, “Everything Harry tells you is a lie.” Then Mudd said, “I’m lying.” Then the android kept going back and forth reciting the circular logic and started to smoke until he did the TOS equivalent of the Blue Screen of Death. ---
**Author:** ![amarinth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3be4f8/32.png) [@amarinth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amarinth)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2013, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930/67 "2013-06-15T03:15:31Z")
[Are you a girl who saved her love for a rainy day?](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wHtd-FTiB1U) It would be a weird request in the first place, and not one that it would be impolite to refuse. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2013, 3:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930/68 "2013-06-15T03:20:14Z")
> [@CookingWithGas](#): > > There was a Star Trek episode, [“I, Mudd”](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzVxsYzXI_Y) (1:25), . Yes! ---
**Author:** ![Cinnamon\_Imp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58956e/32.png) [@Cinnamon\_Imp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cinnamon_Imp)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2013, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930/69 "2013-06-17T18:11:15Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > I was waiting at the bus stop this morning and it started raining. I asked a person if I could stand under her umbrella. > > NO! > > WTF? > > So I decided to take a poll on the subject. Another vote for no, it was not rude of them to decline to share their personal possessions with you, but it was rude of you to ask. OP, if you’re walking down the street hungry, and see someone eating pizza, would you ask them for a slice? If you were walking, would you hitch-hike a lift from passing drivers? ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2013, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930/70 "2013-06-17T19:13:25Z")
> [@Anonymous User](#): > > I > > I generally don’t follow or agree with this, “Bad planning on your part doesn’t constitute an emergency on my part,” shit. > > ? Here is something you _will_ learn from experience: if you give a mouse a cookie, he’s gonna want a glass of milk. I don’t mean to never help anyone, anywhere. But the “bad planners” will take advantage of you every single time, and after a few years, you’ll get tired of cleaning up after them and being put-upon all the time. I might offer to share my umbrella. I’d never ask. And it’s not rude to say no. American society is such that we value our personal space. ---
**Author:** ![delphica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9a140/32.png) [@delphica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/delphica)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2013, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930/71 "2013-06-17T19:56:22Z")
Ugh, way too much violation of personal space. I would be horrified to ask, and horrified to be asked. I voted “maybe” because I can see some specific circumstances where it would be okay, an umbrella-less parent holding an infant, for example. But surely those times would be few and far between. ---
**Author:** ![Delayed\_Reflex](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/delayed_reflex/32/3172_2.png) [@Delayed\_Reflex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Delayed_Reflex)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2013, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930/72 "2013-06-17T20:07:21Z")
I once asked a stranger to share their umbrella with me and ended up getting a date out of it later 😃 It surprised me as much as anyone 😉 That being said under most circumstances (including the bus-stop example) I wouldn’t ask to share an umbrella and wouldn’t consider it rude if someone refused to share. ---
**Author:** ![perfectparanoia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a5b964/32.png) [@perfectparanoia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/perfectparanoia)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2013, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930/73 "2013-06-17T20:16:55Z")
I think asking someone to share is rude. They are perfectly within their rights to say no. However, I also believe that if you have an umbrella and it starts to rain, you it is impolite not to offer to share. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2013, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930/74 "2013-06-17T21:05:28Z")
I put “Maybe.” In my view, it’s impolite to ask, but it’s also impolite to not offer without being asked (for certain values of umbrella radius and combined wet-person radius). ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2013, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930/75 "2013-06-17T21:11:21Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > I was waiting at the bus stop this morning and it started raining. I asked a person if I could stand under her umbrella. > > NO! > > WTF? > > So I decided to take a poll on the subject. > [@expectopatronum](#): > > do you have any sense of boundaries when it comes to interacting with people? Yeah! How dare you ask us for our opinion on this issue, just as though it were any of your business what we think about it! 😛 ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2013, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930/76 "2013-06-17T21:19:38Z")
> [@Anonymous User](#): > > I said “yes”. If you have space for another person, you shouldn’t refuse. > > I can’t imagine saying “no”. Call me a candy-ass or whatever, but I don’t like to let people down like this. Well, if your ass is made of candy I don’t think you should be sharing your umbrella with anybody… ---
**Author:** ![gwendee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/35a633/32.png) [@gwendee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gwendee)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2013, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930/77 "2013-06-17T21:54:42Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > Did everybody stare as though you were both quite insane? Or maybe just you? Thank heaven. I was beginning to lose faith. I’d be startled at being asked, but I’d feel even more awkward about refusing than I would about sharing. I rarely use an umbrella though so I am not likely to have to sort it out. ---
**Author:** ![PandaBear77](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@PandaBear77](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PandaBear77)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2013, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930/78 "2013-06-18T01:24:45Z")
There’s nothing wrong with asking. The worst thing they can do is say no – which, in this case, she did, and yes it makes her a bitch. I can’t imagine just standing there letting someone get wet when simply letting them stand next to me would prevent that. Some people are such assholes. ---
**Author:** ![Arrendajo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Arrendajo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arrendajo)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2013, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930/79 "2013-06-18T01:40:56Z")
I live in the wet Willamette Valley of Oregon. I don’t own one, and I rarely see them used. Since I don’t own one, no one would ever ask me to share mine, and it would never ever occur to me to ask someone else to share theirs. ---
**Author:** ![Blackberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ecd19e/32.png) [@Blackberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackberry)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2013, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930/80 "2013-06-18T01:43:14Z")
> [@PandaBear77](#): > > There’s nothing wrong with asking. The worst thing they can do is say no – which, in this case, she did, and yes it makes her a bitch. > > I can’t imagine just standing there letting someone get wet when simply letting them stand next to me would prevent that. Some people are such assholes. Or maybe if it’s cold and they didn’t bring a coat you guys could huddle up together on the bench under your coat aka sit next to each other. If they’re bored and you have a book they could read over your shoulder (oh actually the OP probably thinks that’s acceptable too, from some other post about looking at what people are doing on their phones on the bus. She must be a real treat in public transportation). [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-impolite-to-refuse-to-share-your-umbrella-with-a-stranger-when-its-raining/660930.md?page=5)