# Is it in poor taste to visit the graves of celebrities? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 23, 2024, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569 "2024-01-23T23:56:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2024, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569/61 "2024-01-26T15:15:14Z")
We’re not confusing it with anything. All the dead Jews I’ve known had stone unveilings a year after they died. ---
**Author:** ![Babale](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/babale/32/15666_2.png) [@Babale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Babale)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2024, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569/62 "2024-01-26T15:24:26Z")
Different _chags_ for different _minhags_, I always say. Ok, I have never said this. But I think it applies here. The only religious rule is that you should do it within a year. The exact timing is the sort of thing that varies by minhag. ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2024, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569/63 "2024-01-26T15:29:12Z")
I’m not fucking confusing anything. Did you read my cite? Did you attend the unveilings of my relatives? Go goysplain somewhere else. ---
**Author:** ![Odesio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/odesio/32/20003_2.png) [@Odesio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odesio)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2024, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569/64 "2024-01-26T15:45:16Z")
Cemeteries and graveyards are made to be visited by the living. Prior to the proliferation of public parks, you might have gone to a cemetery for a picnic or for a lovely stroll. I don’t visit cemeteries very often, but once in a while if I’m near one I’ll walk through them and read the headstones and other monuments. They’re generally open to the public, so it’s not in poor taste to visit. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2024, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569/65 "2024-01-26T15:58:21Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > All the dead Jews I’ve known had stone unveilings a year after they died. My mom qualifies as a dead Jew. My sister handled all of the stuff involving her remains. I had to stop at a funeral home and sign some papers. I do not do funerals, but I’m pretty sure she was cremated. I do not know what became of the cremains. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2024, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569/66 "2024-01-26T16:01:02Z")
> [@Odesio](#): > > Prior to the proliferation of public parks, you might have gone to a cemetery for a picnic or for a lovely stroll. In Vandergrift, Pennsylvania there is a cemetery high atop a hill that affords a perfect view of the Apollo, PA fireworks. The fireworks are at eye level, practically. On the fourth of July it is standing room only at the cemetery. ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2024, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569/67 "2024-01-26T16:01:10Z")
Your mom, though Jewish, didn’t have a Jewish burial so it’s not relevant. No shade, I’m not going to have a Jewish burial either. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2024, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569/68 "2024-01-26T16:04:06Z")
Okay. I’ll admit to being totally ignorant as far as the meaning of anything you said. I hope your non-Jewish burial is a long time from now. ---
**Author:** ![Babale](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/babale/32/15666_2.png) [@Babale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Babale)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2024, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569/69 "2024-01-26T16:16:58Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > On the fourth of July it is standing room only at the cemetery. Well, I think some people are laying down. ---
**Author:** ![Babale](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/babale/32/15666_2.png) [@Babale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Babale)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2024, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569/70 "2024-01-26T16:21:37Z")
> [@bump](#): > > Maybe that’s what they were confusing it with. It’s not a matter of confusion, any more than eating or not eating kitniyot is a matter of confusion. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2024, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569/71 "2024-01-26T16:33:14Z")
I’ve been to the [Kensico Cemetery in Valhalla NY](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kensico_Cemetery). [It’s loaded with celebrity graves](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kensico_Cemetery#Notable_interments_in_Kensico_division). Nothing wrong at all with going to look at them, that’s why there are headstones instead of unmarked graves. ---
**Author:** ![Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/q.q.switcheroo/32/5713_2.png) [@Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.Q.Switcheroo)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2024, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569/72 "2024-01-27T02:59:45Z")
> [@Babale](#): > > > [@kayaker](#): > > > > On the fourth of July it is standing room only at the cemetery. > > Well, I think some people are laying down. And other people are dying to get in. ---
**Author:** ![China\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/779978/32.png) [@China\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/China_Guy)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2024, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569/73 "2024-01-27T05:40:19Z")
> [@Slithy\_Tove](#): > > clods hmmmm, no chicken wire a year ago. ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2024, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569/74 "2024-01-27T18:48:26Z")
I was just trying to maybe shed some light on things, not offend anyone. Calm down. ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2024, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569/75 "2024-01-27T18:59:03Z")
We didn’t need your “help”. The issue was completely resolved with the link I provided. ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2024, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569/76 "2024-01-27T19:06:36Z")
Whatever, you’re the one overreacting here. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2024, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569/77 "2024-01-27T19:42:55Z")
Not really no. At best you spoke from a place of ignorance. You owe the Dope an apology for that. ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2024, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569/78 "2024-01-27T20:33:09Z")
Ok, please continue to lecture me about my own culture. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2024, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569/79 "2024-01-27T22:46:09Z")
Honestly, I thought you were confused too. I had literally no idea that the American custom was different from the Israeli one. Sometimes I wonder whether, if both communities survive, the differences between American and Israeli Jews in terms of culture and customs will, over the centuries, grow to be as great as the original Ashkenazic/Sephardic split. Probably not - the world is more networked and Jews are less self-isolated - but it would be interesting if they did. ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2024, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569/80 "2024-01-27T22:58:55Z")
Absolutely and I was a bit thrown off too but then I found the cite and we both learned something and that was the end of it until the later goysplaining. I thought that maybe you guys were doing it the Sephardic way and that was the reason for the difference but it could certainly be a different reason. I am curious now if American Orthodox do it your way. I learned Israeli Hebrew in the 1970s. My dad pronounced things the old European way. Some of the T sounds at the end of word for us were pronounced with an S sound by elders. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-in-poor-taste-to-visit-the-graves-of-celebrities/996569.md?page=5)