# Is it normal in Arab culture for a man to address another man as "dear" in a conversation? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [December 22, 2019, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-normal-in-arab-culture-for-a-man-to-address-another-man-as-dear-in-a-conversation/845249 "2019-12-22T19:10:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![greenpurple](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/278dde/32.png) [@greenpurple](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/greenpurple)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2019, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-normal-in-arab-culture-for-a-man-to-address-another-man-as-dear-in-a-conversation/845249/1 "2019-12-22T19:10:43Z")
thanks ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2019, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-normal-in-arab-culture-for-a-man-to-address-another-man-as-dear-in-a-conversation/845249/2 "2019-12-22T22:35:38Z")
The very commonly used Arabic word “Habibi” literally translates as “my dear”, but in actual use it’s closer to “my friend” or “buddy” or “pal” or “kiddo”. ---
**Author:** ![greenpurple](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/278dde/32.png) [@greenpurple](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/greenpurple)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2019, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-normal-in-arab-culture-for-a-man-to-address-another-man-as-dear-in-a-conversation/845249/3 "2019-12-22T23:46:58Z")
… ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2019, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-normal-in-arab-culture-for-a-man-to-address-another-man-as-dear-in-a-conversation/845249/4 "2019-12-22T23:54:19Z")
[Similar phenomenon observed in Indian English.](https://english.stackexchange.com/questions/262405/is-the-word-dear-used-as-a-word-to-show-affection-or-for-official-use-in-india) I would guess that the answer to the OP’s question is “yes”. At least, it’s common enough that the endearment is probably not intended as a sign of romantic or sexual interest. ---
**Author:** ![chappachula](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d2c977/32.png) [@chappachula](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chappachula)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 10:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-normal-in-arab-culture-for-a-man-to-address-another-man-as-dear-in-a-conversation/845249/5 "2019-12-23T10:16:43Z")
> [@Alessan](#): > > The very commonly used Arabic word “Habibi” literally translates as “my dear”, but in actual use it’s closer to “my friend” or “buddy” or “pal” or “kiddo”. A better translation for “habibi” is the word “mate”, as used by Aussies and in British (cockney?) slang. It does not mean “dear”, which in American English is used only for your spouse (or as the formal opening of a written letter.) ---
**Author:** ![Fake\_Tales\_of\_San\_Francisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8491ac/32.png) [@Fake\_Tales\_of\_San\_Francisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fake_Tales_of_San_Francisco)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 10:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-normal-in-arab-culture-for-a-man-to-address-another-man-as-dear-in-a-conversation/845249/6 "2019-12-23T10:57:54Z")
I run a proofreading business for overseas university students, and about half of my Arabic speaking customers begin by saying “Hello dear”. Now I know it means ‘friend’ this makes a lot more sense! Thanks. ---
**Author:** ![Jonathan\_Chance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jonathan_chance/32/701_2.png) [@Jonathan\_Chance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonathan_Chance)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 11:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-normal-in-arab-culture-for-a-man-to-address-another-man-as-dear-in-a-conversation/845249/7 "2019-12-23T11:03:20Z")
Yes, indeed. In my younger years one of the circles I ran with had significant Arabic - and Iranian - influence. ‘Dear’ was thrown around all the time. ---
**Author:** ![Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ccd318/32.png) [@Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paul_in_Qatar)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-normal-in-arab-culture-for-a-man-to-address-another-man-as-dear-in-a-conversation/845249/8 "2019-12-23T15:25:05Z")
Yes. “Dear,” or “My dear.” It takes some getting used to. ---
**Author:** ![CookingWithGas](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cookingwithgas/32/485_2.png) [@CookingWithGas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CookingWithGas)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-normal-in-arab-culture-for-a-man-to-address-another-man-as-dear-in-a-conversation/845249/9 "2019-12-23T17:01:46Z")
It is normal for men to address each other as \*habibi \*(\*habibti \*to a woman). Although in everyday usage, people might think of this as “dude,” “bro,” “mate,” or “buddy,” it is a warmer term than those, which is why it is often translated as “dear.” In general, the Arab culture is more demonstrative of affection than American and this shows in their gestures as well as language. My wife is Egyptian and her male relatives and family friends often address me as \*habibi \* (more often her friends’ parents than the younger generation who grew up in the U.S.) and I get hugs and kisses on the cheek when we meet. ---
**Author:** ![Saint\_Cad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saint_cad/32/18907_2.png) [@Saint\_Cad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saint_Cad)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-normal-in-arab-culture-for-a-man-to-address-another-man-as-dear-in-a-conversation/845249/10 "2019-12-23T17:05:26Z")
> [@chappachula](#): > > It does not mean “dear”, which in American English is used only for your spouse (or as the formal opening of a written letter.) Not correct. I have been called “dear” several times in my life by women in semi-professional places - cashier, bank teller. etc. ---
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-normal-in-arab-culture-for-a-man-to-address-another-man-as-dear-in-a-conversation/845249/11 "2019-12-23T17:28:18Z")
> [@Saint\_Cad](#): > > Not correct. I have been called “dear” several times in my life by women in semi-professional places - cashier, bank teller. etc. In American society, there is a different dynamic between same-sex encounters and opposite-sex encounters, physical or verbal. It would be quite strange to hear “dear” between two heterosexual males, not so much between m-f dialogue. ---
**Author:** ![Dark\_Sponge](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dark_sponge/32/121_2.png) [@Dark\_Sponge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dark_Sponge)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-normal-in-arab-culture-for-a-man-to-address-another-man-as-dear-in-a-conversation/845249/12 "2019-12-23T17:36:34Z")
In middle eastern culture non-romantic same-sex affection is more widely displayed. Hand-holding between close friends is common for both men and women. ---
**Author:** ![Saint\_Cad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saint_cad/32/18907_2.png) [@Saint\_Cad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saint_Cad)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-normal-in-arab-culture-for-a-man-to-address-another-man-as-dear-in-a-conversation/845249/13 "2019-12-23T18:27:10Z")
> [@Musicat](#): > > In American society, there is a different dynamic between same-sex encounters and opposite-sex encounters, physical or verbal. It would be quite strange to hear “dear” between two heterosexual males, not so much between m-f dialogue. Read what I was referring to. That post dealt with m-f use of “dear” and implied it was not used casually in the US between non-spouses. ---
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-normal-in-arab-culture-for-a-man-to-address-another-man-as-dear-in-a-conversation/845249/14 "2019-12-23T19:24:15Z")
> [@Saint\_Cad](#): > > Read what I was referring to. That post dealt with m-f use of “dear” and implied it was not used casually in the US between non-spouses. Back atcha. Read what I said. I imply that it may be used casually in the US between non-spouses. Obviously, YMMV. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-normal-in-arab-culture-for-a-man-to-address-another-man-as-dear-in-a-conversation/845249/15 "2019-12-23T19:36:09Z")
Then why did you quote **Saint Cad** ’s post? ---
**Author:** ![Quercus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/7ab992/32.png) [@Quercus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quercus)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-normal-in-arab-culture-for-a-man-to-address-another-man-as-dear-in-a-conversation/845249/16 "2019-12-23T21:19:40Z")
> [@Musicat](#): > > In American society, there is a different dynamic between same-sex encounters and opposite-sex encounters, physical or verbal. It would be quite strange to hear “dear” between two heterosexual males, not so much between m-f dialogue. I think, in this case, it’s not so much about a m-f dialogue as a female speaker. No red-blooded American man would call anyone but his wife ‘dear’, but women are allowed to call others (men or women) ‘dear’ (highest likelihood, older grandmother-like women, and waitress or other service workers to customers). ---
**Author:** ![Triskadecamus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b19c9b/32.png) [@Triskadecamus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Triskadecamus)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-normal-in-arab-culture-for-a-man-to-address-another-man-as-dear-in-a-conversation/845249/17 "2019-12-23T21:32:53Z")
I get addressed as dear, honey, sweetie, and other affectionate forms of address quite frequently by women strangers, but almost never by male strangers. I always have, but do find it even more frequent since moving to North Carolina from Northern Virginia. The linguistic event of such an address by a man would get my attention, because of its significant infrequency, although it would not offend me. My own use of such affectionate salutations is overwhelmingly limited to women I know well, and generally made formal, as in . . . my dear . . . or less formally, perhaps darlin’. ---
**Author:** ![DPRK](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/4491bb/32.png) [@DPRK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DPRK)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-normal-in-arab-culture-for-a-man-to-address-another-man-as-dear-in-a-conversation/845249/18 "2019-12-23T21:42:40Z")
The guy in the OP did not say “dear” or “darling”, though. He said “حبيبي”. Why couldn’t the red-blooded American guy call someone “mate”, or “¿carnal cómo te va?” ---
**Author:** ![gdave](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gdave/32/3683_2.png) [@gdave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gdave)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2019, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-normal-in-arab-culture-for-a-man-to-address-another-man-as-dear-in-a-conversation/845249/19 "2019-12-24T03:32:59Z")
> [@DPRK](#): > > The guy in the OP did not say “dear” or “darling”, though. He said “حبيبي”. Why couldn’t the red-blooded American guy call someone “mate”, or “¿carnal cómo te va?” “حبيبي” doesn’t translate to “mate”. It literally means “my beloved”, although its closest English equivalent is probably “my dear” or “dear”, although “darling” is also pretty close. Arabic is, as they say, spoken from the Gulf to the Ocean, and there’s a lot of regional and dialectical variation, but in general, Arabs use terms of endearment much more freely than Americans. It really is much closer in meaning and connotation to “dear” or “darling” than to “mate” (or “buddy” or “pal”), and Arab men really are much more comfortable using genuine terms of endearment in casual conversation with other men than most American men are. ---
**Author:** ![CairoCarol](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cairocarol/32/3825_2.png) [@CairoCarol](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CairoCarol)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2019, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-normal-in-arab-culture-for-a-man-to-address-another-man-as-dear-in-a-conversation/845249/20 "2019-12-25T17:06:46Z")
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