# Is it okay to be sick of gratuitous gayity? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 29, 2017, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525 "2017-04-29T21:15:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2017, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525/41 "2017-04-30T13:26:24Z")
I’m happy to take the OP’s comments in #21 & subsequent at face value. Where he is in his life and locale, gayness is fully acceptable; just another personal preference. OTOH, waving the token \*whatever \*flag in what’s supposed to be entertainment is distracting. Not for its _whatever_ness, but for its blatant _tokenism_. The producers might think they’re preaching or they might think they’re pandering. But in either case they’re doing it unsubtly and pulling the focus off the entertainment. At least for some viewers. My view is give it some time. As with the UN-flavored commercials of today, they’ll get better at making it less in your face and we’ll all become a lot more used to it. Both of which are good things. The world has a lot more variety in it than does almost every one of our individual lives. TV bringing that variety to us is good. Good for individual people and good for society as a whole. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2017, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525/42 "2017-04-30T13:27:44Z")
> [@yellowjacketcoder](#): > > This is my boogerbear, so forgive me. > > … > Granted, Shatner (Kirk) and Nichols (Uhura, not Uhuru) did muff the alternate takes on purpose so [the kiss](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kirk_and_Uhura%27s_kiss) would be shown, but it was still eight years after the first one. I’ll grant it was probably the first interracial kiss shown on a **popular** tv show. > … Thanks for the correction. I was going from memory and we’re supposed to be about accuracy here. ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2017, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525/43 "2017-04-30T13:34:53Z")
> [@dropzone](#): > > In real life I’m okay with it, because most people keep their gender preferences under their hats… . Why should anyone do this? ---
**Author:** ![GrumpyBunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bc8723/32.png) [@GrumpyBunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrumpyBunny)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2017, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525/44 "2017-04-30T13:53:12Z")
Why do you get to decide what is “gratuitous gayity”? ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2017, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525/45 "2017-04-30T14:20:03Z")
> [@panache45](#): > > But look at your thread title. It strongly implies that you’re perfectly ok with a male character who has a girlfriend or wife, even though there’s no reason in the plot why he couldn’t have a boyfriend or husband. There are a lot of “gratuitous” things that simply act to flesh out a character, make him more real and more interesting, that have no bearing on the plot. Yet you’ve focused on sexual orientation as the one thing you find objectionable. For this thread, perhaps, but I find lots of things objectionable. And speaking of Ron Glass, as someone did, in the first season Barney Miller had a wife. Her role faded away as the creators realized the story was in the station, and he stopped being gratuitously straight. > [@bobot](#): > > Why should anyone do this? The topic doesn’t come up. ---
**Author:** ![Orr\_G](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ee59a6/32.png) [@Orr\_G](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Orr_G)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2017, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525/46 "2017-04-30T14:28:38Z")
> [@Santelia](#): > > Anyone else glance title as “gratuitous gravity”? Yes! I was looking forward to a serious and weighty discussion on the tactless and hacky overuse of artificial gravity in scifi shows, and whether or not we should tolerate (or celebrate) it, owing to an understanding of the conventions and limitations of story-telling in modern television. Upon reading the actual OP, I was pretty confused for a while there. But now I’m straight. ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2017, 2:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525/47 "2017-04-30T14:34:29Z")
> [@Orr\_G](#): > > But now I’m straight. Golf clap. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2017, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525/48 "2017-04-30T14:35:17Z")
ETA: Ninja’d to perfection. \ I think. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![AK84](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@AK84](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AK84)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2017, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525/49 "2017-04-30T14:43:40Z")
Absolutely agree with the OP. In a couple of shows I saw recently, we see two hot lesbians going at it. For no reason except “hot girls naked”. Did not advance the plot at all. Such gratuitous gayness needs to be put down. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2017, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525/50 "2017-04-30T15:26:58Z")
> [@yellowjacketcoder](#): > > The[first interracial kiss on TV](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/First_interracial_kiss_on_television) was broadcast in 1959. The first interracial kiss in US television was broadcast in 1960. The _Star Trek_ episode you reference (_[Plato’s Stepchildren](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Plato%27s_Stepchildren)_) was broadcast in 1968. (It was mind-control, not a love potion, btw). Granted, Shatner (Kirk) and Nichols (Uhura, not Uhuru) did muff the alternate takes on purpose so [the kiss](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kirk_and_Uhura%27s_kiss) would be shown, but it was still eight years after the first one. I’ll grant it was probably the first interracial kiss shown on a **popular** tv show. And didn’t they turn the camera angle so you couldn’t actually see Kirk and Uhuru kiss, but you inferred it to be happening although you were looking at the back of Kirk’s head? ---
**Author:** ![Patx2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/73ab20/32.png) [@Patx2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patx2)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2017, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525/51 "2017-04-30T15:31:20Z")
> [@TokyoBayer](#): > > Exactly, which is why the OP is offensive. He didn’t need to specify “wife.” He could have said “partner” and not rubbed his heterosexuality in everyone’s face. I did not read that much into it. I never refer to my husband as my partner, I’ve been referring to him as my husband for over 20 years. I don’t do it to offend people, and if it does offend others I think that’s crazy. I don’t know the OP, so when he (assuming a he) refers to his wife that could be a female or a male. I just don’t see him rubbing his heterosexuality in anyone’s face by calling his wife his wife if he is a male and she is a female. My daughter and I were just having this conversation recently and we both agree, people have a tendency to wear their sexuality on their sleeves when we just don’t need to know. ---
**Author:** ![Tzigone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/839c29/32.png) [@Tzigone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tzigone)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2017, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525/52 "2017-04-30T15:45:08Z")
> [@Martian Bigfoot](#): > > Oh, wow. I hate to be the one to tell you this, but I think you’re restricting yourself. You’re certainly not maximizing your viewing pleasure for those binge-sessions of _Friends_. I don’t watch Friends. And I don’t like being told how to watch tv. I’m a true rarity - a mostly canon shipper. There are few times I have to go otherwise, but not many. And I hate the fanon-prevalent hero/villain pairing. In my fanfic or head-canons, I like the characters to remain in-character - and sexuality (attitudes on fidelity, casual sexual activity, canon sexual histories; I dislike explicitly virginal characters given sexual histories or explicitly non-virginal characters made into virgins (or only had sex once) and I’ve seen both of those) and sexual preference is part of that. So is how they regard the murderers and torturers that are the bad guys. Otherwise, I’d just read fiction with original characters. It also deeply saddens me that there can be non non-sexual important relationships in fanon these days. I mean, it’s good that homosexual characters can be shipped, too. It’s bad that I have so much trouble finding platonic fic for canonically platonic, but deeply important, relationships. Including those between siblings (same or opposite sex siblings). ---
**Author:** ![FloatyGimpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/floatygimpy/32/7750_2.png) [@FloatyGimpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FloatyGimpy)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2017, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525/53 "2017-04-30T15:50:52Z")
> [@Patx2](#): > > I just don’t see him rubbing his heterosexuality in anyone’s face by calling his wife his wife if he is a male and she is a female. If he referred to his husband, would that be “in your face homosexuality” or is it OK? ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2017, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525/54 "2017-04-30T16:04:19Z")
> [@Patx2](#): > > I did not read that much into it. I never refer to my husband as my partner, I’ve been referring to him as my husband for over 20 years. I don’t do it to offend people, and if it does offend others I think that’s crazy. I don’t know the OP, so when he (assuming a he) refers to his wife that could be a female or a male. I just don’t see him rubbing his heterosexuality in anyone’s face by calling his wife his wife if he is a male and she is a female. My daughter and I were just having this conversation recently and we both agree, people have a tendency to wear their sexuality on their sleeves when we just don’t need to know. Whoosh. Sarcasm doesn’t translate that well online. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2017, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525/55 "2017-04-30T16:29:11Z")
For those who are clueless (like me): [Shipping](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shipping_(fandom)) ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2017, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525/56 "2017-04-30T18:00:38Z")
> [@TokyoBayer](#): > > Sarcasm doesn’t translate that well online. Don’t I know it! ---
**Author:** ![Patx2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/73ab20/32.png) [@Patx2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patx2)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2017, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525/57 "2017-04-30T18:54:03Z")
> [@FloatyGimpy](#): > > If he referred to his husband, would that be “in your face homosexuality” or is it OK? Well, like I said, I don’t know the OP at all including gender. And, to answer your question, no, it would not. It’s not like he was posting about how much he likes potato salad and said something like I’m straight or I’m gay. That’s sort of my point, and I thought the OP’s point, sometimes it just doesn’t matter and we don’t need to know. ---
**Author:** ![Patx2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/73ab20/32.png) [@Patx2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patx2)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2017, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525/58 "2017-04-30T18:55:54Z")
> [@TokyoBayer](#): > > Whoosh. > > Sarcasm doesn’t translate that well online. How do you think I was being sarcastic? I wasn’t trying to be. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2017, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525/59 "2017-04-30T21:33:13Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > > [@yellowjacketcoder](#): > > > > The[first interracial kiss on TV](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/First_interracial_kiss_on_television) was broadcast in 1959. The first interracial kiss in US television was broadcast in 1960. The _Star Trek_ episode you reference (_[Plato’s Stepchildren](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Plato%27s_Stepchildren)_) was broadcast in 1968. (It was mind-control, not a love potion, btw). Granted, Shatner (Kirk) and Nichols (Uhura, not Uhuru) did muff the alternate takes on purpose so [the kiss](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kirk_and_Uhura%27s_kiss) would be shown, but it was still eight years after the first one. I’ll grant it was probably the first interracial kiss shown on a **popular** tv show. > > And didn’t they turn the camera angle so you couldn’t actually see Kirk and Uhuru kiss, but you inferred it to be happening although you were looking at the back of Kirk’s head? **yellowjacketcoder** ’s last link (“the kiss”) is a still of the shot. Mostly side on, and their lips are in shadow. But there’s no doubt its real lips to lips. ---
**Author:** ![Patx2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/73ab20/32.png) [@Patx2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patx2)\ **Post date:** [April 30, 2017, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525/60 "2017-04-30T22:59:15Z")
> [@TokyoBayer](#): > > Whoosh. > > Sarcasm doesn’t translate that well online. I went back and reread, do I get a medal for the most stupid on the boards today? When may I collect my cash prize? 🙄 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-okay-to-be-sick-of-gratuitous-gayity/785525.md?page=4)