# Is it possible to be mildly depressed and still have a sense of humor?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-possible-to-be-mildly-depressed-and-still-have-a-sense-of-humor/499256>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [June 9, 2009, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-possible-to-be-mildly-depressed-and-still-have-a-sense-of-humor/499256 "2009-06-09T21:41:22Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![SenorBeef](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senorbeef/32/2220_2.png) [@SenorBeef](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SenorBeef)\
**Post date:** [June 11, 2009, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-possible-to-be-mildly-depressed-and-still-have-a-sense-of-humor/499256/21 "2009-06-11T12:58:19Z")

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I think the funniest people tend to be damaged in some way, so there’s probably a stronger correlation between depressed people and a good sense of humor on average.

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**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\
**Post date:** [June 11, 2009, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-possible-to-be-mildly-depressed-and-still-have-a-sense-of-humor/499256/22 "2009-06-11T13:43:13Z")

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The first thing I do when a friend breaks down in tears or appears depressed is to try and say something that’ll make them laugh. Doesn’t make the angst go away, but right here, right now, it makes it more bearable. As a sad, baseline-depressed person myself, I intuitively grok that. You husband just doesn’t.

And **BrassyPhrase** , yeah, the first example that springs in my mind is also Bill Murray. The guy certainly looks like a miserable bastard, but damn if he ain’t one of the funniest deadpan comedian out there.

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**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\
**Post date:** [June 11, 2009, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-possible-to-be-mildly-depressed-and-still-have-a-sense-of-humor/499256/23 "2009-06-11T23:35:44Z")

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The funniest people I have ever met are the ones that are tortured inside.

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**Author:** ![Amp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Amp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amp)\
**Post date:** [June 12, 2009, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-possible-to-be-mildly-depressed-and-still-have-a-sense-of-humor/499256/24 "2009-06-12T00:10:24Z")

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This seems to fit the spirit of the thread:

A man goes to the doctor. Says he’s depressed. He says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world where what lies ahead is vague and uncertain. The doctor says “The treatment is simple. The great clown Pagliacci is in town tonight. Go and see him, that should pick you up.” The man bursts into tears. He says “But doctor… I am Pagliacci.”

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**Author:** ![Zoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a4c791/32.png) [@Zoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoe)\
**Post date:** [June 12, 2009, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-possible-to-be-mildly-depressed-and-still-have-a-sense-of-humor/499256/25 "2009-06-12T00:34:45Z")

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“I laughed. I cried. It became a part of me.” – Selma Diamond as Selma Hacker, _Night Court_

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**Author:** ![Zoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a4c791/32.png) [@Zoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoe)\
**Post date:** [June 12, 2009, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-possible-to-be-mildly-depressed-and-still-have-a-sense-of-humor/499256/26 "2009-06-12T00:45:30Z")

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**Amp** , now you’ve done it. _PaGLiACCiO_ just destroys me. And that is good sometimes for a little while.

My sense of humor always got better when I was in the hospital for depression. This was generally true of everyone. We were pretty much in a “nothing left to lose” state without any pretensions around each other. No one stayed reserved for very long. You haven’t been trully vetted until you’ve played a secret game of Truth or Dare on the mental ward.

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**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\
**Post date:** [June 12, 2009, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-possible-to-be-mildly-depressed-and-still-have-a-sense-of-humor/499256/27 "2009-06-12T02:34:25Z")

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> [@Shirley\_Ujest](#):
>
> The funniest people I have ever met are the ones that are tortured inside.

Yes.

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**Author:** ![Yorikke](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yorikke/32/4335_2.png) [@Yorikke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yorikke)\
**Post date:** [June 12, 2009, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-possible-to-be-mildly-depressed-and-still-have-a-sense-of-humor/499256/28 "2009-06-12T03:00:14Z")

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I was miserably depressed, for a couple of years, about 15 years ago, and NEVER lost my sense of humor. That’s just not what depression is about.

Joe

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**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\
**Post date:** [June 12, 2009, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-possible-to-be-mildly-depressed-and-still-have-a-sense-of-humor/499256/29 "2009-06-12T03:06:38Z")

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I think this anecdote is fitting:

I was at the hospital when they had just told me that my husband had died. A nurse and an administrator of some sort took me into a little private room and sat with me while we waited for my family to get there.

In the midst of my tears, I looked at these two very kind women who were sitting with me as I bawled. Then I said, “Wow, your jobs SUCK.”

All three of us laughed.

I’m going through horrible grief, but I haven’t stopped laughing yet. Some of us are just like that.

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**Author:** ![Ruby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/13edae/32.png) [@Ruby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruby)\
**Post date:** [June 12, 2009, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-possible-to-be-mildly-depressed-and-still-have-a-sense-of-humor/499256/30 "2009-06-12T03:14:19Z")

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Adding another to the depressingly funny people.

If you do choose to go to the doc and eventually are diagnosed with depression, may I suggest that you also do some research that may help your husband understand what being depressed means. At least with my husband, if he can understand the technicalities of something, he has an easier time parsing the symptoms.

Many people mistakenly think that depression is “the blues” or feeling sad. It’s way more complicated than that and a little education for your family will go a long way toward your recovery.

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**Author:** ![Sir\_T-Cups](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ed655f/32.png) [@Sir\_T-Cups](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sir_T-Cups)\
**Post date:** [June 12, 2009, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-possible-to-be-mildly-depressed-and-still-have-a-sense-of-humor/499256/31 "2009-06-12T03:45:00Z")

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Two Words:

[Rorschach’s Joke](http://bobbydrakie.spaces.live.com/blog/cns!C928D176B795D464!1695.entry)  
Edit: Damn, **Amp** beat me to it. But this is the title of what s/he posted.  
Also, never been treated by I am sure I am all kinds of depressed, but my sense of humor and wit are two VERY strong points I have

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**Author:** ![Flipshod](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f19dbf/32.png) [@Flipshod](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flipshod)\
**Post date:** [June 12, 2009, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-possible-to-be-mildly-depressed-and-still-have-a-sense-of-humor/499256/32 "2009-06-12T13:36:58Z")

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One more yes vote. Clinically depressed over ten years. I vacillate between darkness and silliness. And I agree with others that depression and humor can not only coexist but may even be correlated.

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**Author:** ![Rushgeekgirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rushgeekgirl/32/3715_2.png) [@Rushgeekgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rushgeekgirl)\
**Post date:** [June 12, 2009, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-possible-to-be-mildly-depressed-and-still-have-a-sense-of-humor/499256/33 "2009-06-12T13:54:33Z")

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I laugh because crying is pointless.

Damn, that’s depressing!

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**Author:** ![shiftless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9c0ed/32.png) [@shiftless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shiftless)\
**Post date:** [June 12, 2009, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-possible-to-be-mildly-depressed-and-still-have-a-sense-of-humor/499256/34 "2009-06-12T14:02:19Z")

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Yep. I immediately thought of my dad when I read the thread title. Every indication (and a few doctors) said he was depressed, probably for as long as I knew him, but when he wanted to he was charming, intelligent and/or funny.

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**Author:** ![Markxxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5daacb/32.png) [@Markxxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Markxxx)\
**Post date:** [June 12, 2009, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-possible-to-be-mildly-depressed-and-still-have-a-sense-of-humor/499256/35 "2009-06-12T16:21:12Z")

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I agree with the OP, one thing a lot of people fail to realize is this:

_Happiness is **NOT** the absence of sadness_.

It’s often hard for people to accept this, after all we’re told “If you did not know sadness you wouldn’t know happiness.”

Bull, that’s akin to saying, “If you didn’t know pain, you wouldn’t know when you’re NOT in pain.”

Of course you would. No one has to tell you you’re in pain.

Happiness is it’s OWN emotion, but people don’t realize this. Happiness is simply not the act of having no misery. But time and again I see people say “I have nothing to complain about so why aren’t I happy?”

I used to give a motivational lecture called “Is happiness dead.” In it I’d examine for the audience WHY they feel bad and WHAT makes them happy. The fact is they are not mutually exclusive.

It’s only when people TRY to get something that they believe will make them happy.

Try this for an exercise, get a small writing book, that fits in a pocket. Then for the next week, everytime you find yourself, laughing, busting out in a smile or such, write it down.

It will amaze you what kind of things make you happy, but it will scare you when you look how little you have written down.

People use drugs, drink, wish, but there is no shortcut to happiness. Don’t confuse happiness with security. If I had all my bills paid off I’d be happy, but “happy” isn’t the correct emotion. The correct emotion is “relieved.” Or “unstressed” Or whatever.

Yes you can be upset one minute and sad the next. You can be angry then have it be over the next minute.

Emotions aren’t necessarily dependent on each other.

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**Author:** ![Black\_Sunshine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ce73a5/32.png) [@Black\_Sunshine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Black_Sunshine)\
**Post date:** [June 12, 2009, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-possible-to-be-mildly-depressed-and-still-have-a-sense-of-humor/499256/36 "2009-06-12T17:33:21Z")

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I’m fairly certain that I don’t suffer from depression, but I’ll add this: Some of the times in my life when I’ve laughed the hardest have been at funerals and visitations.

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**Author:** ![cwthree](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de0a6/32.png) [@cwthree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cwthree)\
**Post date:** [June 12, 2009, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-possible-to-be-mildly-depressed-and-still-have-a-sense-of-humor/499256/37 "2009-06-12T17:57:12Z")

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> [@Maastricht](#):
>
> I wonder if humor can stay intact when a person is mildly depressed.

Yes. Sometimes the sense of humor is the _only_ sense that stays intact when a person is depressed.

One’s sense of humor has nothing to do with one’s feeling of happiness.

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**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\
**Post date:** [June 12, 2009, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-possible-to-be-mildly-depressed-and-still-have-a-sense-of-humor/499256/38 "2009-06-12T19:15:18Z")

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> [@Zoe](#):
>
> You haven’t been trully vetted until you’ve played a secret game of Truth or Dare on the mental ward.

I wish I could, but mild depression saps me of the strength and hope to set goals and attain them.

😉

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**Author:** ![Maastricht](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e57/32.png) [@Maastricht](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maastricht)\
**Post date:** [June 12, 2009, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-possible-to-be-mildly-depressed-and-still-have-a-sense-of-humor/499256/39 "2009-06-12T20:59:33Z")

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So, I’m going out on a limb here and assume the answer to my question is a tentative “yes”. 😃

Thanks everybody!

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**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\
**Post date:** [June 12, 2009, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-possible-to-be-mildly-depressed-and-still-have-a-sense-of-humor/499256/40 "2009-06-12T21:02:53Z")

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Both of my parents have gone through several depressions (some longer, some shorter, all exogenic and untreated); both have kept a sense of humor. It may have been more corrosive than usual (Dad) or more twisted than usual (Mom), but it was there.

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