# Is it racist to use the term 'Master Bedroom' **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 21, 2022, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613 "2022-10-21T22:47:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 13
**Author:** ![Novelty\_Bobble](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Novelty\_Bobble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Novelty_Bobble)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2022, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613/241 "2022-10-25T14:41:03Z")
> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > No, it’s really not. If it’s what you intended to say, you said it really poorly. Which bit of that first quote of mine do you disagree with, or don’t understand? And what do you mean by > [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > I can choose what I do with my feelings if not that you are able to choose how you react to what you feel? ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2022, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613/242 "2022-10-25T14:41:21Z")
> [@Novelty\_Bobble](#): > > The person who has the non-offensive context/usage/intent explained to them has the option to continue taking offense/feeling discomfort or not There’s an awful lot of qualifiers in here, but if we remove some of them, we get: “The person has the option to continue feeling discomfort or not.” ---
**Author:** ![Novelty\_Bobble](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Novelty\_Bobble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Novelty_Bobble)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2022, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613/243 "2022-10-25T14:42:51Z")
> [@Johnny\_Bravo](#): > > There’s an awful lot of qualifiers in here, but if we remove some of them, we get: > > “The person has the option to continue feeling discomfort or not.” Do you not think the qualifiers might be there for a reason? ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2022, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613/244 "2022-10-25T14:44:31Z")
> [@Novelty\_Bobble](#): > > Do you not think the qualifiers might be there for a reason? Oh, I very much do. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2022, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613/245 "2022-10-25T14:45:33Z")
> [@Novelty\_Bobble](#): > > Which bit of that first quote of mine do you disagree with I trust you missed it the first time I wrote it, so here it is again: > [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > I can’t choose what the feelings are. > [@Novelty\_Bobble](#): > > Do you not think the qualifiers might be there for a reason? The qualifiers only qualify an additional experience a person may have. They don’t change your essential argument that people have the option to continue feeling something, which is nonsense. ---
**Author:** ![Novelty\_Bobble](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Novelty\_Bobble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Novelty_Bobble)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2022, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613/246 "2022-10-25T14:45:38Z")
> [@Johnny\_Bravo](#): > > Oh, I very much do. Then best not to take them out then. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2022, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613/247 "2022-10-25T14:50:35Z")
> [@Novelty\_Bobble](#): > > Then best not to take them out then. Bless your heart, but no. If you make a post like that, it’s perfectly reasonable to select a single set of possibilities from among the many you constructed. If you don’t want people doing that, make your points more clearly and with less obfuscation. ---
**Author:** ![Novelty\_Bobble](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Novelty\_Bobble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Novelty_Bobble)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2022, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613/248 "2022-10-25T14:51:07Z")
> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > They don’t change your essential argument that people have the option to continue feeling something What are you talking about? that is nothing like my essential point. You _don’t_ have the option to chose that initial feeling of offence, you _do_ have the option to _stop_ taking offence and modify your reaction if you find the explanation of context, intent and usage valid. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2022, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613/249 "2022-10-25T14:53:09Z")
> [@Novelty\_Bobble](#): > > you _do_ have the option to _stop_ taking offence and modify your reaction You seem completely unclear on the difference between “the option to continue feeling discomfort” and “the option to modify your reaction.” At this point, I think that lack of clarity is on you, not me, and I don’t have the skills or interest to explain it to you. ---
**Author:** ![Novelty\_Bobble](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Novelty\_Bobble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Novelty_Bobble)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2022, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613/250 "2022-10-25T14:53:22Z")
> [@Johnny\_Bravo](#): > > Bless your heart, but no. If you make a post like that, it’s perfectly reasonable to select a single set of possibilities from among the many you constructed. If you don’t want people doing that, make your points more clearly and with less obfuscation. I can’t stop you cherry picking my words in order to construct a point that you feel comfortable arguing against. If that’s your style, go for it but you’ll be playing by yourself. ---
**Author:** ![Novelty\_Bobble](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Novelty\_Bobble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Novelty_Bobble)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2022, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613/251 "2022-10-25T14:58:27Z")
> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > You seem completely unclear on the difference between “the option to continue feeling discomfort” and “the option to modify your reaction.” At this point, I think that lack of clarity is on you, not me, and I don’t have the skills or interest to explain it to you. OK, I’ll leave it there then. ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2022, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613/252 "2022-10-25T15:00:37Z")
**Modnote** : Do not accuse other posters of lying (outside of the Pit). That is what calling their post(s) gaslighting is. ---
**Author:** ![k9bfriender](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k9bfriender/32/3283_2.png) [@k9bfriender](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/k9bfriender)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2022, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613/253 "2022-10-25T16:04:13Z")
I’m just curious as to why people in this thread choose to be offended that realtors may start calling the biggest bedroom in the house the “Main” or “Primary” room rather than “Master”. ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2022, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613/254 "2022-10-25T16:13:25Z")
Thread drift. As mentioned, the OP question was answered, it’s not inherently racist but it’s falling out of favor. But the discussion quickly drifted into the use of the word “master” itself and, from there, the question of whether the fact someone experiences discomfort, makes you morally obligated to prevent that discomfort. ---
**Author:** ![bump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7c8e57/32.png) [@bump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bump)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2022, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613/255 "2022-10-25T16:18:11Z")
Here’s the thing though… I can’t control what offends other people. I can only control myself. I’m not going to go _out of my way_ to offend someone, but nor am I going to tiptoe around words that aren’t _actually offensive_ to a reasonable non-ignorant person. It’s absurd to wall off whole words and phrases that aren’t offensive or racist in any way, simply because ignorant people don’t know better. And getting offended over the innocuous use of the word “master” in the phrase “master bedroom” is pretty much the definition of unreasonable and ignorant. It’s not racist, it’s not classist, and it more than likely derives from the old term “master of the house”, meaning the person who runs the household. It seems… timid and apologetic when no apology is necessary I guess. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2022, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613/256 "2022-10-25T16:22:22Z")
To take a less politically-charged example: my fourth-grade daughter’s teacher just sent home rules for Hallowe’en costumes. They were pretty standard stuff: no gore, no super-scary costumes, no full-face masks. But there was an unusual rule added: no clown outfits. I noticed this and mentioned it to my wife. My daughter overheard me and said, “Yeah, that was because of me.” She’s got a clown phobia, and in years past has gotten pretty stressed over Hallowe’en. And she’s pretty good about speaking up. So the teacher asked folks not to wear clown outfits. Her clown phobia is, by definition, _irrational_. If it weren’t, it wouldn’t be a phobia. You could explain to her until the cows came home that a kid in a clown outfit doesn’t present a threat to her, and most of the time isn’t even trying to be scary. (there was a kid planning on a Pennywise costume, but even if there weren’t, the phobia would be there). She can’t control her emotion: the clown outfit is gonna make her feel stressed. Knowing that, the teacher had a choice: 1. Tell her to suck it up; or 2. Ask students to wear a different costume. I submit that the teacher made the right choice here: even though her distress is irrational, a kind person is willing to take minimal measures to alleviate others’ discomfort. Acting all defensive about it and thinking you can explain people out of their emotions? Nonsense. ---
**Author:** ![k9bfriender](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k9bfriender/32/3283_2.png) [@k9bfriender](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/k9bfriender)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2022, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613/257 "2022-10-25T16:40:59Z")
> [@bump](#): > > It’s absurd to wall off whole words and phrases that aren’t offensive or racist in any way, simply because ignorant people don’t know better. Everyone is ignorant, even you. No one is non-ignorant, not even you. Using it as an insult to dismiss people as being unworthy of even your contempt doesn’t really come across as well as you may think it does. And it’s not just those who would be _ignorant_ of a word’s history that may find offense to it. It may be that they are _less_ ignorant than you about how it is used contemporaneously. > [@bump](#): > > And getting offended over the innocuous use of the word “master” in the phrase “master bedroom” is pretty much the definition of unreasonable and ignorant. The offense is rarely over the word itself, and more about the choice made by the speaker to use the word. You _could_ choose to use a different word, and yet you chose to use this word. That choice that _you_ made is what people are likely to find offensive. > [@bump](#): > > It’s not racist, it’s not classist, and it more than likely derives from the old term “master of the house”, meaning the person who runs the household. Right, and everyone else is in the house is subservient to that master. > [@bump](#): > > It seems… timid and apologetic when no apology is necessary I guess. No one has said that you have to choose your vocabulary any differently, they have just said that they will. And if you are left as being one of the few who have chosen to not change their vocabulary, then it would be reasonable to assume that you made that choice for a reason, and to speculate as to what that reason may be. Your explanations will likely fall on uninterested ears, as they know that you had a choice, and they know what choice you chose. > [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > Acting all defensive about it and thinking you can explain people out of their emotions? Nonsense. And if a child chooses to come dressed as a clown anyway, and _explains_ to your daughter that she has no reason to be afraid of clowns, I would put it on the child who chose to dress as a clown as the one _trying_ to offend at that point. ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2022, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613/258 "2022-10-25T16:45:20Z")
> [@Dinsdale](#): > > So what do we call someone who fails to follow suit in a card game? If they’re our partner, we probably call them a dumbass or similar. If they’re our opponent, we just call the director (duplicate-bridge-specific). I don’t think it’s ever been customary to make the words “renege” or “revoke” into agent nouns, rather than just saying that so-and-so has revoked, or reneged, in the play of the hand. I get that you were winkying about the verbally transgressive potential of the made-up word “reneger”, but AFAICT there’s never been a real-life practice of using such a word. If anybody does need such a word, they’ll probably find that the synonym “revoker” works fine. ---
**Author:** ![Mighty\_Mouse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mighty_mouse/32/7776_2.png) [@Mighty\_Mouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Mouse)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2022, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613/259 "2022-10-25T16:50:10Z")
> [@Kimstu](#): > > If they’re our partner, we probably call them a dumbass or similar. If they’re our opponent, we just call the director (duplicate-bridge-specific). OMG, I’ve been playing online only for so long, I didn’t even conceive of someone illegally ruffing or sluffing, accidentally or deliberately. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2022, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613/260 "2022-10-25T16:52:06Z")
This. I’ve been playing bridge for decades, and i use the verb “renege” somewhat frequently, as in, not than once a year, on average. I’ve never heard it turned into a noun. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613.md?page=12) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-racist-to-use-the-term-master-bedroom/973613.md?page=14)