What you do is still passive aggressive. And this is not a way to have healthy relationships. You want your parents to engage in healthy behavior and take responsibility for their actions, yet you justify your unhealthy behavior because of theirs. It’s sad.
I don’t agree it is sad. But OK.
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I wonder if someone could turn this into a form of reparation. Like “you did this or that to me and if you dont give me X amount of money now I will always hate you or tell your grandchildren what you did”?
I mean is someone wanting simple acknowledgment, remorse, and apology or something bigger like retaliation or even bigger like reparation?
Are you seriously telling me some parents don’t fuck up? Because that’s the comment you’re saying “nope” to.
Hmm. Do your parents know this? Do they know that if they apologized that this would bring closure and you would stop bringing up those topics? Has this conversation taken place?
Mind you, I also agree with your earlier post that they might not act logically regardless, and if they always did act logically that they wouldn’t have started any of this dysfunction in the first place, but I’m also wondering if they actually do know this.
(Not least because for my parents, us apologizing to them about some incident where we were in the wrong wouldn’t stop them bringing it up again. And again.)
You state that all parents fuck up.
Do you believe that all parents are equally bad and that the mistakes normal parents make are equivalent to the abuse and severe neglect that some parents do?