# Is it rude to guess where someone's from based on their accent? How rude? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 28, 2012, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935 "2012-08-28T15:31:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![typoink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecb155/32.png) [@typoink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/typoink)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2012, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935/41 "2012-08-29T02:53:39Z")
In my experience, it’s never rude if you get it right. It’s a sign of recognition. If you get it wrong, some people might take it as “othering” and some might be annoyed if you flub one of the commonly mistaken ones (South Africans, I hear, are often exasperated by how often they are asked if they’re Australian). ---
**Author:** ![PaulParkhead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@PaulParkhead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PaulParkhead)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2012, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935/42 "2012-08-29T03:03:57Z")
Another problem is that, regardless of whether the guesser gets it right or wrong (as I mentioned above, most people guessed wrong in my case, but I don’t really care because there are worse things to be than Irish), it can be annoying to realise people are listening more to your accent than to what you’re actually saying. ---
**Author:** ![Brynda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e79b87/32.png) [@Brynda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brynda)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2012, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935/43 "2012-08-29T03:17:32Z")
PaulParkhead, just once I wanted someone to react that way to me! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![prettydorky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f04885/32.png) [@prettydorky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/prettydorky)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2012, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935/44 "2012-08-29T03:44:24Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > Of course the problem in this case may be guessing Australian. I can see where that would annoy a lot of people who aren’t Australian. 🙂 This. My English grandmother \* hated \*being asked if she was Australian. Still, her response was a supremely icy “No”, and not a lecture. That is more rude. Still, some people have all kinds of feelings tied into it, and so I’d give it a 1 on rudeness scale just because of the possibility of those feelings getting stepped on. Other people’s feelings are not your responsibility of course, but just to be on the safe side I would only name a specific place of origin if you are fairly certain. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2012, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935/45 "2012-08-29T03:46:49Z")
I think it’s stupid in the “those who think they are smarter than they are, are stupid” way - specially when the person asking “are you from X?” gets a “no, I’m from Y” and says “no way!”, which I’ve had happen many times (then again, even one would have been too many). Asking “where are you from?” doesn’t start the conversation with what may be a mistake. The situation in the OP sounds like he didn’t let enough time pass or wait for an appropriate lull before asking, also (as some people have pointed out). Dude’s in study mode and you’re making chitchat and opening with a shot that misses by half a planet: way to go! As **Paul Parkhead** says, it’s annoying to think “I’m trying to have a conversation/learn/teach here and all you can think of is my accent?” In fact, people’s reactions to my accent are the reason I avoid using VoIP in English in MMOs; too many guys seem to be more preoccupied with the accent than with what I say. I’m trying to get you to move your arse out of the fire, move it first, flirt later! Or even better, don’t flirt: I may be closer to your mother’s age than to yours. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2012, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935/46 "2012-08-29T04:05:30Z")
It can be rude, I guess, if you just walk up to a stranger and do it. But if you do it to someone you’re already talking to, and do it in a positive manner ("Hey, let me see if I can guess where you’re from. You’re from \_\_\_\_, right?), I can’t see it being a problem. And, yes, anyone who stops to lecture you for it has lost any grounds to call you on your rudeness. I know the correct response would be “It must suck to constantly be thought to come from the wrong country” or something like that, but I’d be more likely to actually be confrontational (a rarity for me) and say, “And it’s not rude for you to lecture me?” ---
**Author:** ![PaulParkhead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@PaulParkhead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PaulParkhead)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2012, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935/47 "2012-08-29T04:22:05Z")
> [@Brynda](#): > > PaulParkhead, just once I wanted someone to react that way to me! 🙂 So, move to Renfrew. 🙂 Or don’t. I advise against it, all things considered. Heh. Seriously, in small towns like Renfrew you probably would get such a reaction. In nearby Glasgow, well, meh, another Yank. See them every day. It very much depends on where you are in the UK. ---
**Author:** ![PaulParkhead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@PaulParkhead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PaulParkhead)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2012, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935/48 "2012-08-29T04:32:39Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > And, yes, anyone who stops to lecture you for it has lost any grounds to call you on your rudeness. I know the correct response would be “It must suck to constantly be thought to come from the wrong country” or something like that, but I’d be more likely to actually be confrontational (a rarity for me) and say, “And it’s not rude for you to lecture me?” Well, I agree - I never lectured anyone about anything. I was polite, tolerant and never kicked off at anyone. The questions were invariably well-intentioned; why would I be rude in response? It’s not intrinsically rude, IMO, to ask someone where they’re from. Just bear in mind that they may be sick to death of fielding such enquiries. ---
**Author:** ![DoctorJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctorj/32/2904_2.png) [@DoctorJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DoctorJ)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2012, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935/49 "2012-08-29T05:05:50Z")
I don’t mind. If they’re right it’s cool, and if they’re wrong I get to feel superior. 🙂 I’ve suppressed my Southern drawl a lot, so not many people get it right. I get Texas a lot. But I met a professor once who studied regional Southern (especially Kentucky) accents who pinpointed mine _down to the county_. What’s rude–and what happens to me with surprising regularity, including once this past weekend–is to find out someone is from, say, Kentucky and immediately start telling a story about some horrible act of racism that your friend encountered there. ---
**Author:** ![sandra\_nz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eada6e/32.png) [@sandra\_nz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sandra_nz)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2012, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935/50 "2012-08-29T05:16:05Z")
It gets tiring and it is difficult to have the same conversation over and over and still sound interested. For me it goes like this: “Are you from Australia?” “No, I’m from New Zealand.” Option 1: “New Zealand is such a lovely country, my [random related person] went there in [random year] and loved it. They went [list of places in New Zealand]. They did [random list of touristy things to do in New Zealand]” Option 2: “I’ve never been, but always wanted to go.” Sometimes followed up with: “We’ve been to Australia but didn’t make it to New Zealand.” Option 3: “Why would you come to this shit hole of a country? New Zealand is so much nicer than Britain!” My response: “Oh? How long did you live in New Zealand?” Their usual response: “Oh, I’ve never actually been there.” Me: “…” ---
**Author:** ![thelurkinghorror](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7c8e57/32.png) [@thelurkinghorror](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thelurkinghorror)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2012, 5:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935/51 "2012-08-29T05:25:48Z")
> [@PaulParkhead](#): > > Another problem is that, regardless of whether the guesser gets it right or wrong (as I mentioned above, most people guessed wrong in my case, but I don’t really care because there are worse things to be than Irish), it can be annoying to realise people are listening more to your accent than to what you’re actually saying. I am not specifically familiar with the South Lanarkshire accent, but if it’s like a lot of Scottish accents and especially near Glasgow, people are only listening to your accent because they _don’t understand_ what you’re saying! It’s better to just nod. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![JKellyMap](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jkellymap/32/15880_2.png) [@JKellyMap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JKellyMap)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2012, 11:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935/52 "2012-08-29T11:00:15Z")
One way to avoid the pitfalls of “where are you FROM” is to focus on the accent alone. In appropriate situations, and with a friendly tone, and NOT as the first thing you say upon meeting someone, ask them something like, “It sounds like your English is a bit different than how I pronounce it…”. Surely, they will then tell you why: if it’s a regional English accent, they’ll tell you the region (e.g., Australia or Texas); if it’s interference from a non-English mother tongue, they’ll either identify the mother tongue (“yeah, my first language is Swahili”), or the country (“yeah, I was born in Greece and lived there until I was fifteen”). If you want to enjoy your own guessing game, usually you’re better off doing that on your own head (followed by exclaiming “That’s what I thought!”, maybe, if you were right), though there’s little danger in asking someone, “Any chance you’re Canadian?” (sometimes they’re just from Minnesota). ---
**Author:** ![galen\_ubal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/galen_ubal/32/4440_2.png) [@galen\_ubal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/galen_ubal)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2012, 11:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935/53 "2012-08-29T11:55:35Z")
US born and raised, living in Australia, and working in a hotel. Yes, it gets tedious being asked where I’m from, what part of the States, etc… Still, I don’t think they’re rude for asking, nor would I feel it was right to be short with them. I’m amused that I’m often taken for being Canadian; whether that’s because of my muddled accent (midwest and deep south), my courtesy, or because people believe Canadians are touchy about being mistaken for Americans\* depends, I suppose, on the feelings of the questioner. \*Yes, I know we’re both technically Americans - but common usage, people! And Canadians do have that rep overseas. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2012, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935/54 "2012-08-29T12:58:51Z")
> [@Northern\_Piper](#): > > You do know there’s such a thing as a cover story, right? > > I’m guessing CIA. Maybe Mossad. That is _amazing_. ---
**Author:** ![Dogzilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@Dogzilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dogzilla)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2012, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935/55 "2012-08-29T13:16:46Z")
I was born and raised in Ohio and have a bit of a midwestern accent, but that is mixed with a bit of a southern accent from having lived south of the Mason-Dixon line for 20 years. When I lived in the upstate part of South Carolina, people would talk to me for five minutes and then say: “You ain’t from here, are ya?” :dubious: I thought that was pretty rude because the tone of voice very much said, “Yankee go home; you don’t belong here.” After a while, I realized that the intent was generally curiosity as to where exactly I’m from because it was obvious that I wasn’t native to the South. I decided to translate that (in my head) to the polite form of the question, which to me is, “So. Where are you from?” ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2012, 1:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935/56 "2012-08-29T13:40:57Z")
I’m trying to figure out why this upset the man. I was in a pub in London. The young lady waiting on me asked me if I were Canadian. I was surprised but not at all offended. Canadian accents are not the same as US accents and yet, to a Londoner’s ears, perhaps they are similar. Why get upset? ---
**Author:** ![PaulParkhead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@PaulParkhead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PaulParkhead)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2012, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935/57 "2012-08-29T16:07:01Z")
> [@thelurkinghorror](#): > > I am not specifically familiar with the South Lanarkshire accent, but if it’s like a lot of Scottish accents and especially near Glasgow, people are only listening to your accent because they _don’t understand_ what you’re saying! It’s better to just nod. 🙂 Heh, maybe. South Lanarkshire accents are a lot like Glasgow, only a bit more…yokel? But my accent is mild and I rarely had trouble being understood. Except in that damn Subway in Hagerstown, MD. “Ham and tomato please” “???” I repeat several times, eventually pointing to the cold ham on the counter. She glares at me with a why-didn’t-you-say-so-in-the-first-place look and says “Oh, HAY-yum!” So that was one down and on to the second ingredient: tomahto or tomayto, I pondered. Then got my wife to finish the order. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2012, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935/58 "2012-08-29T16:14:26Z")
> [@PaulParkhead](#): > > Heh, maybe. South Lanarkshire accents are a lot like Glasgow, only a bit more…yokel? But my accent is mild and I rarely had trouble being understood. Except in that damn Subway in Hagerstown, MD. > > “Ham and tomato please” > “???” > > I repeat several times, eventually pointing to the cold ham on the counter. She glares at me with a why-didn’t-you-say-so-in-the-first-place look and says “Oh, HAY-yum!” So that was one down and on to the second ingredient: tomahto or tomayto, I pondered. Then got my wife to finish the order. I shouldn’t find this funny but I can’t help it. The thought of you desperately having to point at things just so you can get a sammich makes me giggle. ---
**Author:** ![PaulParkhead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@PaulParkhead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PaulParkhead)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2012, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935/59 "2012-08-29T16:23:06Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > I shouldn’t find this funny but I can’t help it. The thought of you desperately having to point at things just so you can get a sammich makes me giggle. It was funny afterwards, yeah. Plus, I was starving - we’d just driven through a blizzard for 5 hours. ---
**Author:** ![DMark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@DMark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DMark)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2012, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935/60 "2012-08-29T16:28:47Z")
Whenever I hear someone with an obvious southern accent (from Alabama or wherever), I always ask if they are from New York City…the response and facial expressions are priceless. Some think I am being serious. I will say that traveling in Europe was enlightening when I would overhear someone ask Canadians if they were American. Wow - they would vehemently declare they were Canadian and then go off on an anti-American tangent. Most of the time they got really pissy about it and I had no idea how much they hated being identified as an American. Ouch. Here in the US, I can usually pick up a German accent from 100 feet away. Instead of asking where they are from, I will just ask a question in German. If I am correct, they are never offended and usually appreciate speaking German a bit with a stranger. If I am wrong (seldom) they just stare at me blankly and I walk away. No harm, no fowl. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-guess-where-someones-from-based-on-their-accent-how-rude/632935.md?page=4)