# Is it rude to indicate that you made the thing you were just complimented on? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 16, 2013, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-indicate-that-you-made-the-thing-you-were-just-complimented-on/671435 "2013-10-16T21:21:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Rhiannon8404](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rhiannon8404/32/17929_2.png) [@Rhiannon8404](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhiannon8404)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2013, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-indicate-that-you-made-the-thing-you-were-just-complimented-on/671435/1 "2013-10-16T21:21:53Z")
For example, I’m wearing a pair of socks that I knit myself and someone tells me how cool my socks are. Am I allowed to say, “Thanks, I made them” or is that rude? I wonder if it sounds like I am bragging (which I guess I kind of am) or just fishing for continued compliments. What it really is, is that I am so excited that someone else thinks something I made is cool. ---
**Author:** ![beowulff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beowulff/32/542_2.png) [@beowulff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beowulff)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2013, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-indicate-that-you-made-the-thing-you-were-just-complimented-on/671435/2 "2013-10-16T21:24:50Z")
I don’t think it’s rude in the slightest. It might be rude if you went around and started all your conversions with “Hi, I made these socks!” ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2013, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-indicate-that-you-made-the-thing-you-were-just-complimented-on/671435/3 "2013-10-16T21:25:44Z")
I’d say it’s perfectly fine. I know if I compliment someone, I’d love to hear they made it. That makes the compliment special. ---
**Author:** ![chizzuk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e36b37/32.png) [@chizzuk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chizzuk)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2013, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-indicate-that-you-made-the-thing-you-were-just-complimented-on/671435/4 "2013-10-16T21:27:47Z")
If I paid someone a compliment about something and they told me they made it themselves, I would take it as an opportunity to pay further compliments to their crafting skills and ogle over said item, not think they were being rude. If you said something out of the blue like, “Like my socks? I made them!” I wouldn’t think it was rude, per se, but definitely socially awkward. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2013, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-indicate-that-you-made-the-thing-you-were-just-complimented-on/671435/5 "2013-10-16T21:58:21Z")
God, I hope not – I always do. ---
**Author:** ![Sahirrnee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sahirrnee/32/13937_2.png) [@Sahirrnee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sahirrnee)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2013, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-indicate-that-you-made-the-thing-you-were-just-complimented-on/671435/6 "2013-10-16T22:01:41Z")
no ---
**Author:** ![Peremensoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ce7236/32.png) [@Peremensoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peremensoe)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2013, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-indicate-that-you-made-the-thing-you-were-just-complimented-on/671435/7 "2013-10-16T22:12:06Z")
Rather than just informing an admirer that you are the maker–which assumes that you were being complimented only on taste, and may not be necessary–try saying something _about_ the making. “Great socks!” “Thanks, this is the first time I tried doing the pattern like this with three colors.” or whatever. It’s more humble _and_ more impressive, and works whether they knew already that you made socks (or whatever it may be) or not. ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2013, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-indicate-that-you-made-the-thing-you-were-just-complimented-on/671435/8 "2013-10-16T22:17:14Z")
> [@Peremensoe](#): > > Rather than just informing an admirer that you are the maker–which assumes that you were being complimented only on taste, and may not be necessary–try saying something _about_ the making. I’ve found this to be really true. When someone someone compliments me on something I’ve made, then talking matter-of-fact about it then can turn it into an interesting conversation which would never happen if you are the one to bring it up. ---
**Author:** ![Rhiannon8404](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rhiannon8404/32/17929_2.png) [@Rhiannon8404](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhiannon8404)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2013, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-indicate-that-you-made-the-thing-you-were-just-complimented-on/671435/9 "2013-10-16T23:00:47Z")
> [@Peremensoe](#): > > Rather than just informing an admirer that you are the maker–which assumes that you were being complimented only on taste, and may not be necessary–try saying something _about_ the making. > “Great socks!” > “Thanks, this is the first time I tried doing the pattern like this with three colors.” > or whatever. It’s more humble _and_ more impressive, and works whether they knew already that you made socks (or whatever it may be) or not. Great idea! I think I will do this. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2013, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-indicate-that-you-made-the-thing-you-were-just-complimented-on/671435/10 "2013-10-16T23:01:06Z")
> [@Peremensoe](#): > > Rather than just informing an admirer that you are the maker–which assumes that you were being complimented only on taste, and may not be necessary–try saying something _about_ the making. > “Great socks!” > “Thanks, this is the first time I tried doing the pattern like this with three colors.” > or whatever. It’s more humble _and_ more impressive, and works whether they knew already that you made socks (or whatever it may be) or not. This is what I was going to suggest. “Thanks! I had so much fun making them!” comes off as enthusiastic without any suggestion of bragging. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2013, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-indicate-that-you-made-the-thing-you-were-just-complimented-on/671435/11 "2013-10-16T23:06:31Z")
It’s an assertive way to receive a compliment, a technique I learned from my therapist. When someone compliments me, I usually just say thank you and smile. Which doesn’t make for good conversation. Occasionally I do the “bad” thing and downplay the compliment by being overly modest. “You like this shirt? I think it makes me look fat and I’m wearing it only 'cuz it was the only clean shirt left.” When you respond assertively, you agree with the compliment by telling a positive story about the object of interest. Person A: “B, I like your shirt!” Person B: “Thanks! I saw it in the dress store window last week and I just had to get it!” or you could say Person B: “Thanks! I made it myself!” ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2013, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-indicate-that-you-made-the-thing-you-were-just-complimented-on/671435/12 "2013-10-16T23:36:16Z")
I think it would be strange _not_ to mention you made it. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2013, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-indicate-that-you-made-the-thing-you-were-just-complimented-on/671435/13 "2013-10-16T23:44:10Z")
“Thanks! I had some underpaid, overworked Chinese ladies make it for me then ship it over here!” 🙂 Yeah, I agree with all the others - having a conversation about the making of something takes it to another level. ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [October 16, 2013, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-indicate-that-you-made-the-thing-you-were-just-complimented-on/671435/14 "2013-10-16T23:45:18Z")
Moving from MPSIMS to IMHO at the OP’s request. And here’s my follow-up question: Is it also ok when people compliment you on your kids? ---
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2013, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-indicate-that-you-made-the-thing-you-were-just-complimented-on/671435/15 "2013-10-17T00:07:30Z")
> [@Hal\_Briston](#): > > Moving from MPSIMS to IMHO at the OP’s request. > > And here’s my follow-up question: Is it also ok when people compliment you on your kids? Not at all. Just smile and say “Thanks, I made them myself!” Wait, in your case more like “Thanks, my wife made them herself, but I helped create the pattern.” ---
**Author:** ![Ranger\_Jeff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranger_jeff/32/2065_2.png) [@Ranger\_Jeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranger_Jeff)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2013, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-indicate-that-you-made-the-thing-you-were-just-complimented-on/671435/16 "2013-10-17T00:39:49Z")
[http://www.gocomics.com/calvinandhobbes/1987/04/18](http://www.gocomics.com/calvinandhobbes/1987/04/18) Sure, it’s alright to toot your horn a little. ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2013, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-indicate-that-you-made-the-thing-you-were-just-complimented-on/671435/17 "2013-10-17T00:49:22Z")
> [@Rhiannon8404](#): > > For example, I’m wearing a pair of socks that I knit myself and someone tells me how cool my socks are. Am I allowed to say, “Thanks, I made them” or is that rude? I wonder if it sounds like I am bragging (which I guess I kind of am) or just fishing for continued compliments. What it really is, is that I am so excited that someone else thinks something I made is cool. Not at all! Any normal person hearing that is going to think something along the lines of “Oh even COOLER socks”! ---
**Author:** ![HoneyBadgerDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/honeybadgerdc/32/1033_2.png) [@HoneyBadgerDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HoneyBadgerDC)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2013, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-indicate-that-you-made-the-thing-you-were-just-complimented-on/671435/18 "2013-10-17T01:02:42Z")
I almost always carry the latest sample of my crafts around in my car just hoping I will find a victim I can share it with. I also enjoy hearing and seeing others crafts as long as they don’t go overboard and show me everything they have done. ---
**Author:** ![SeaDragonTattoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeaDragonTattoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDragonTattoo)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2013, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-indicate-that-you-made-the-thing-you-were-just-complimented-on/671435/19 "2013-10-17T01:59:36Z")
When people compliment me on my gorgeous hair, it’s on the occasions I’m wearing a wig. I say, “Thanks! I just bought it!” And see if they figure it out. On topic, I think the advice above is great. When crafty people tell me the thing I complimented them on was made by them, it makes the compliment more special. It makes me feel like I have a good eye, and them feel like they’re good at what they did. ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2013, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-indicate-that-you-made-the-thing-you-were-just-complimented-on/671435/20 "2013-10-17T02:39:30Z")
Ok ok, show us a damn picture of the socks you made already!! 🙂 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-rude-to-indicate-that-you-made-the-thing-you-were-just-complimented-on/671435.md?page=2)