# Is it sex drive or something else that makes a wealthy, powerful man risk it all for hooker sex? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 18, 2016, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sex-drive-or-something-else-that-makes-a-wealthy-powerful-man-risk-it-all-for-hooker-sex/746419 "2016-02-18T05:10:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![the\_diego](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7bcc69/32.png) [@the\_diego](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/the_diego)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2016, 9:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sex-drive-or-something-else-that-makes-a-wealthy-powerful-man-risk-it-all-for-hooker-sex/746419/21 "2016-02-19T09:10:28Z")
“This big house and all this money around us… it don’t mean nothing. I’m fvcker! That’s what I am --and that’s what you married!” ---
**Author:** ![you\_with\_the\_face](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/ecccb3/32.png) [@you\_with\_the\_face](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/you_with_the_face)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2016, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sex-drive-or-something-else-that-makes-a-wealthy-powerful-man-risk-it-all-for-hooker-sex/746419/22 "2016-02-19T19:01:50Z")
Perhaps some men see power, fame, and acclaim as a means to get as much sex as they want. Expecting them to be monogamous after they’ve reached the pinnacle of success is like expecting a boarded plastic surgeon to settle for a $50k salary. ---
**Author:** ![Stuffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f17d59/32.png) [@Stuffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stuffy)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2016, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sex-drive-or-something-else-that-makes-a-wealthy-powerful-man-risk-it-all-for-hooker-sex/746419/23 "2016-02-19T20:39:36Z")
Wasn’t this the plot/premise of a South Park episode? ---
**Author:** ![ftg](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ftg/32/2801_2.png) [@ftg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ftg)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2016, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sex-drive-or-something-else-that-makes-a-wealthy-powerful-man-risk-it-all-for-hooker-sex/746419/24 "2016-02-20T18:03:57Z")
Start with insecurity. A lot of successful people are incredibly worried that it will all go up in smoke. Known a lot of people, who, once they get past “doing reasonably okay”, get more and more anxious as the income increases. The opposite of what you might think. Note that there is sometimes a link between bullying and insecurity. Often, but not always. Some successful people got there by being bullies. Pushing around subordinates and such isn’t the biggest thrill. How about forcing someone to have sex with you for pay? Now, that’s a top notch bullying experience. Really calms down your insecurities. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2016, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sex-drive-or-something-else-that-makes-a-wealthy-powerful-man-risk-it-all-for-hooker-sex/746419/25 "2016-02-20T22:27:20Z")
Think of all the reasons why you DON’T frequent a high end call girl. Typically it’s because a) you don’t have the disposable income to spend and b) you are unwilling to take the legal and social risks if you get caught. Wealthy powerful men don’t have to worry about a) and I suppose in certain cases they don’t give two shits about b). Seriously. What is the legal consequence of getting caught with a prostitute? In New York it’s a Class A misdemeanor punishable with a fine or up to a year in jail time. Maybe his wife divorces him, but that just gives him more time to bank more prostitutes. Sptizer evidently is rich as shit so it’s not like he’s going to go broke and his family money is not subject to getting split in a divorce. So IOW, he’s not exactly “risking it all”. Maybe for some it’s insecurity. A lot of successful people were nerds when they were younger. They became successful because while all the dumb jocks were banging cheerleaders, they were holed up in the library or computer lab. Now those dumb jocks are fat middle-aged men making $50k a year and the nerds are now wealthy and successful and women are responding to that. But on some level they are that rejected nerd still proving they can get the hot chick. Then again, a lot of wealthy and successful people grow up in an entitled culture where they have been getting everything they wanted since birth. There’s no “insecurity” to it. Their wife is just an accessory that they would not think twice about cheating on any more than they might care about not driving their usual car or eating at their favorite restaurant a few times a week. > [@astro](#): > > Spitzer’s net worth is around 75 million and his family’s wealth is the hundreds of millions. If you live a high profile life you can’t be going to high end call girls all the time and yet he, a very bright man, made that decision over and over until he got caught. How is Spitzer so wealthy? Is it all family money? I think the most lucrative thing he’s done was work as a partner at law firm Skadden, Arps, Slate, Meagher & Flom for like 2 years. While that’s a lucrative job, they aren’t paying tens of million of dollars. ---
**Author:** ![actualliberalnotoneofthose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e79b87/32.png) [@actualliberalnotoneofthose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/actualliberalnotoneofthose)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2016, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sex-drive-or-something-else-that-makes-a-wealthy-powerful-man-risk-it-all-for-hooker-sex/746419/26 "2016-02-21T05:48:02Z")
I think if I were a wealthy unmarried man of a certain age I would ONLY do high-end hooker sex. There has to be a better way to do it without getting caught. I know many men manage to. ---
**Author:** ![actualliberalnotoneofthose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e79b87/32.png) [@actualliberalnotoneofthose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/actualliberalnotoneofthose)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2016, 5:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sex-drive-or-something-else-that-makes-a-wealthy-powerful-man-risk-it-all-for-hooker-sex/746419/27 "2016-02-21T05:51:36Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > How is Spitzer so wealthy? Is it all family money? I think the most lucrative thing he’s done was work as a partner at law firm Skadden, Arps, Slate, Meagher & Flom for like 2 years. While that’s a lucrative job, they aren’t paying tens of million of dollars. Luxury real estate. His father owned quite a bit and he has continued to grow his family’s holdings. Spitzer himself has disclosed that he makes more than $2 million per year as a landlord. ---
**Author:** ![Napier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ce73a5/32.png) [@Napier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Napier)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2016, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sex-drive-or-something-else-that-makes-a-wealthy-powerful-man-risk-it-all-for-hooker-sex/746419/28 "2016-02-21T15:10:25Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > I think it’s a psychological side affect of having everyone in your immediate orbit constantly telling you how great you are and catering to your every whim. You start to believe the hype. You’re bullet proof. You’re not going to get caught. And even if you do, it will blow over. > > This is the same reason celebs often have meltdowns when they are not let into a popular club or restaurant. “WHAT? YOU WON’T LET ME IN? DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?!” I like this idea. It makes the most sense to me. But I don’t think I really know. I just don’t get it, really. I don’t understand the desire for power, either. Infatuation is really nice, even in little crushes, but when it hits me, it’s about how wonderful that particular person is. Paying for sex as a disposable commodity just seems sad. ---
**Author:** ![typoink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecb155/32.png) [@typoink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/typoink)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2016, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sex-drive-or-something-else-that-makes-a-wealthy-powerful-man-risk-it-all-for-hooker-sex/746419/29 "2016-02-21T23:35:57Z")
I think in at least some cases it’s a quite different effect – guys in powerful positions at least sometimes use sex workers as a way to be vulnerable. Not “maybe I’ll get caught” vulnerable per se, but more like, “I usually have to be guarded and false and perfect in how I act and speak all the time, I need to just be me for while and be a little reckless” vulnerable. That’s why you also get all the stories about sex workers being paid just to talk or to do pretty light duty play with rich guys. And it’s also part of why there’s a fairly common theme in BDSM scenes that “high profile, successful business guy” types are often submissive. Giving up power is how they separate from their day to day shit. (Corollary: a lot of dominants can be flakes, fuckups, or menial workers outside the dungeon). ---
**Author:** ![typoink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecb155/32.png) [@typoink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/typoink)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2016, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sex-drive-or-something-else-that-makes-a-wealthy-powerful-man-risk-it-all-for-hooker-sex/746419/30 "2016-02-21T23:40:58Z")
> [@Napier](#): > > Paying for sex as a disposable commodity just seems sad. It doesn’t have to be at all. Some people can separate sex and intimacy and romance into neat, separate piles and fulfill them independently. Most of us don’t really have that talent or luxury, but there are folks for who it works. And there are also folks who enjoy sex but aren’t comfortable in relationships for any number of reasons. I think it would probably be healthier for everyone involved if such folks can get their sexual stimulation in an honest, straightforward way without having to “pick up” partners with potentially false promises. There’s a sort of cliche that most sex is sex work, it’s just done on a barter system – we trade sex for companionship, support, and, well, more sex. Overstated? Probably, but I think there’s some truth there. ---
**Author:** ![CairoCarol](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cairocarol/32/3825_2.png) [@CairoCarol](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CairoCarol)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2016, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sex-drive-or-something-else-that-makes-a-wealthy-powerful-man-risk-it-all-for-hooker-sex/746419/31 "2016-02-23T18:24:16Z")
I’ve always assumed that the transgressive nature of the sex is part of the appeal. Isn’t sex with a hooker one male fantasy, along with the naughty nurse nancy, Catholic school girl, cheerleader, and so on? But combine that fantasy with enough cash and a feeling of invincibility, and – hey, no need to fantasize or just do role-play with the little wifey; you can actually act out this desire for real! But I have no idea; this is mere speculation on my part. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2016, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sex-drive-or-something-else-that-makes-a-wealthy-powerful-man-risk-it-all-for-hooker-sex/746419/32 "2016-02-23T20:37:26Z")
Me am Rich. Me want Sex now. Me am powerful. Me get sex now! ---
**Author:** ![CairoCarol](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cairocarol/32/3825_2.png) [@CairoCarol](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CairoCarol)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2016, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sex-drive-or-something-else-that-makes-a-wealthy-powerful-man-risk-it-all-for-hooker-sex/746419/33 "2016-02-23T21:55:27Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > Me am Rich. > Me want Sex now. > Me am powerful. > Me get sex now! Wouldn’t it be just awesome to catch The Donald in a sex scandal? ---
**Author:** ![SecretaryofEvil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e95f7d/32.png) [@SecretaryofEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SecretaryofEvil)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2016, 12:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sex-drive-or-something-else-that-makes-a-wealthy-powerful-man-risk-it-all-for-hooker-sex/746419/34 "2016-02-24T12:38:51Z")
I think there are many men out there who believe that the best part of being wealthy and or powerful is the access to a steady stream of good looking and compliant sexual partners. ---
**Author:** ![ftg](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ftg/32/2801_2.png) [@ftg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ftg)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2016, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sex-drive-or-something-else-that-makes-a-wealthy-powerful-man-risk-it-all-for-hooker-sex/746419/35 "2016-02-24T19:10:29Z")
> [@CairoCarol](#): > > Wouldn’t it be just awesome to catch The Donald in a sex scandal? I can guarantee you his polling numbers won’t go down one bit. He’s America’s Berlusconi. ---
**Author:** ![CairoCarol](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cairocarol/32/3825_2.png) [@CairoCarol](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CairoCarol)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2016, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sex-drive-or-something-else-that-makes-a-wealthy-powerful-man-risk-it-all-for-hooker-sex/746419/36 "2016-02-24T21:25:51Z")
> [@ftg](#): > > I can guarantee you his polling numbers won’t go down one bit. > > He’s America’s Berlusconi. Sadly, I agree. But it would still be fun to watch. His sexual MO, though arguably distasteful, doesn’t seem to enter into the realm of truly scandalous, alas. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sex-drive-or-something-else-that-makes-a-wealthy-powerful-man-risk-it-all-for-hooker-sex/746419.md?page=1)