# Is it sexist for men not to kiss as a greeting? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 18, 2011, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sexist-for-men-not-to-kiss-as-a-greeting/606679 "2011-12-18T22:14:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 5\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Lukeinva](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lukeinva/32/17872_2.png) [@Lukeinva](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lukeinva)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2011, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sexist-for-men-not-to-kiss-as-a-greeting/606679/21 "2011-12-19T20:56:39Z")
> [@Nunavut\_Boy](#): > > Meh. > > I am expected to kiss the cheeks of both parents of my italian and russian friends. Also bizou’s are totally expected for french female friends. Cultural norms, and all that. I have a hard to getting behind your jihad. I am in concurrence, and in addition add Spanish girls to the list. Meeting a Spanish girl (or saying goodbye) is always with a beso one for each side. I find it charming. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2011, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sexist-for-men-not-to-kiss-as-a-greeting/606679/22 "2011-12-19T21:24:02Z")
It would only be sexist if the difference were unwelcome. And even then it’s not sexist if the reason the difference was unwelcome was simply a difference in cultural standards. If differentiating by sex were inherently sexist, then the fact that you are straight (or gay) would be sexist. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2011, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sexist-for-men-not-to-kiss-as-a-greeting/606679/23 "2011-12-19T22:24:45Z")
> [@hogarth](#): > > I’d go the other way and say it’s sexist to expect everyone else to “kiss hello”. I hate kissing hello. This is standard protocol in my husband’s family, regardless of gender. His family functions will have like 100 people so it takes fifteen minutes for everyone to kiss hello. The weird thing is kissing people you only see once a year. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2011, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sexist-for-men-not-to-kiss-as-a-greeting/606679/24 "2011-12-19T22:49:41Z")
> [@Illuminatiprimus](#): > > This is so far below the threshold of what constitutes a serious debate that I’m not even going to contemplate putting it in GB. > > I was watching a chat show recently and it hit me as I watched the guess come on and greet one another that our culturally accepted forms of greeting are sexist - that is they are differentiated on the basis of sex. That is not what sexist means. Sexism is the contention, by word or deed, that one sex is superior to the other, or that one sex should be given preferential treatment over the other. It is not sexist to acknowledge that women and men are not identical. I have to make some decisions this week that will determine how big my employees’ bonuses are. It would be sexist of me to given all the men extra points in their evaluations just because they’re men, or to do the same thing for women. It’s not sexist that I’m more willing to kiss my female friends than my male friends (assuming I had any close male friends other than my brother and cousins, which I don’t). It’s just different customs and history. > [@hogarth](#): > > I’d go the other way and say it’s sexist to expect everyone else to “kiss hello”. I hate kissing hello. How is it sexist? What does the word _sexist_ mean to you? I could buy offensive, annoying, intrusive, irksome, vexatious, or irritating, but to call expecting the same behavior from both genders sexist seems silly to me. You’ve tortured all meaning from the word. ---
**Author:** ![Illuminatiprimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/illuminatiprimus/32/11520_2.png) [@Illuminatiprimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Illuminatiprimus)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2011, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sexist-for-men-not-to-kiss-as-a-greeting/606679/25 "2011-12-19T22:51:13Z")
Okay - I don’t know how to use the word sexist, clearly. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-it-sexist-for-men-not-to-kiss-as-a-greeting/606679.md?page=1)