# Is negotiating offensive? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 27, 2017, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-negotiating-offensive/778332 "2017-01-27T18:38:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![amaguri](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/49beb7/32.png) [@amaguri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amaguri)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-negotiating-offensive/778332/1 "2017-01-27T18:38:18Z")
I’m trying to get a few things fixed around the house. I got a quote from one handyman that wasn’t exactly unreasonable but, you know, I’m on a budget! So I asked if he could do everything for $x, at which point he stopped returning my messages. So of course it’s well within anyone’s rights to stop communication with someone else for any reason, but just soliciting opinions here… is trying to get a (relatively small!) discount offensive? ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-negotiating-offensive/778332/2 "2017-01-27T18:42:22Z")
I think so. Not a huge offense, but I assume people are giving me a fair quote and want to keep it as low as they can to get my business. Instead of asking for a discount, I’d phase it as “that’s a bit over my budget, thanks for your time.” Then they can decide if they want to offer it for less. ---
**Author:** ![Tim\_R.Mortiss](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tim_r.mortiss/32/142_2.png) [@Tim\_R.Mortiss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_R.Mortiss)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-negotiating-offensive/778332/3 "2017-01-27T18:43:57Z")
IMHO, when money is involved, there is no such thing as offensiveness. ---
**Author:** ![amaguri](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/49beb7/32.png) [@amaguri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amaguri)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-negotiating-offensive/778332/4 "2017-01-27T18:48:56Z")
> [@Procrustus](#): > > I think so. Not a huge offense, but I assume people are giving me a fair quote and want to keep it as low as they can to get my business. Instead of asking for a discount, I’d phase it as “that’s a bit over my budget, thanks for your time.” Then they can decide if they want to offer it for less. To add a little color, he gave me a quote for 1 item. There are 5 of those items that need to be fixed, so I said can I get all 5 done for $x. ---
**Author:** ![Buck\_Godot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/buck_godot/32/6573_2.png) [@Buck\_Godot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Buck_Godot)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-negotiating-offensive/778332/5 "2017-01-27T18:50:09Z")
He may just feel from past experience that someone who is going to nickle and dime him over price is going to be difficult in other aspects of the job. ---
**Author:** ![amaguri](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/49beb7/32.png) [@amaguri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/amaguri)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-negotiating-offensive/778332/6 "2017-01-27T18:58:05Z")
> [@Buck\_Godot](#): > > He may just feel from past experience that someone who is going to nickle and dime him over price is going to be difficult in other aspects of the job. This is kinda what I was thinking, too. But it was an innocent request based on my dwindling bank account ☹ ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-negotiating-offensive/778332/7 "2017-01-27T19:01:39Z")
> [@Buck\_Godot](#): > > He may just feel from past experience that someone who is going to nickle and dime him over price is going to be difficult in other aspects of the job. This. When someone tries to negotiate price with me, I’d just as soon move on rather than spend time dickering. IME “negotiators” are a tiny minority of my client base and not worth the effort on my part. ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-negotiating-offensive/778332/8 "2017-01-27T19:02:14Z")
> [@amaguri](#): > > To add a little color, he gave me a quote for 1 item. There are 5 of those items that need to be fixed, so I said can I get all 5 done for $x. Not offensive. ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-negotiating-offensive/778332/9 "2017-01-27T19:29:15Z")
> [@amaguri](#): > > To add a little color, he gave me a quote for 1 item. There are 5 of those items that need to be fixed, so I said can I get all 5 done for $x. Do you mean 5 identical items requiring the same repair? If so, what kind of discount off just 5 times his quote were you asking? Did you offer 4.5x? 4x? 2x? If you lowballed him by a significant amount, he may have just decided there’s no way you would be able to meet in the middle and moved on. ---
**Author:** ![PastTense](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pasttense/32/14550_2.png) [@PastTense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PastTense)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-negotiating-offensive/778332/10 "2017-01-27T19:34:45Z")
Negotiating may or may not be offensive depending on the circumstances. ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-negotiating-offensive/778332/11 "2017-01-27T19:43:04Z")
No, it’s not. On the other hand, failing to answer a text from a customer in a timely manner _is_ offensive. He’s perfectly entitled to say “no, and sorry but I’m no longer interested in the job”, but he should do so. His rude behavior is probably a good indication of the level of response that you would get if he did the job and there were any subsequent problems or concerns. ---
**Author:** ![Sattua](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sattua/32/11906_2.png) [@Sattua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sattua)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-negotiating-offensive/778332/12 "2017-01-27T19:44:48Z")
Maybe not offensive, but a naive thing to do when trying to hire a contractor/construction crew/handyman. In the areas we’ve lived in, anyway, those guys have more offers for work than they have time to take on. You should be grateful he showed up for the quote. ---
**Author:** ![k9bfriender](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k9bfriender/32/3283_2.png) [@k9bfriender](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/k9bfriender)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-negotiating-offensive/778332/13 "2017-01-27T19:46:43Z")
> [@amaguri](#): > > I’m trying to get a few things fixed around the house. I got a quote from one handyman that wasn’t exactly unreasonable but, you know, I’m on a budget! So I asked if he could do everything for $x, at which point he stopped returning my messages. > > So of course it’s well within anyone’s rights to stop communication with someone else for any reason, but just soliciting opinions here… is trying to get a (relatively small!) discount offensive? I don’t think he was offended, but he probably decided it wasn’t worth his time. How much of a discount were you asking for? If you were looking to take a few percent off the top, that’s reasonable. If you were looking at a 25% or more discount, then there is no reason for him to work for that much less than his going rate. ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-negotiating-offensive/778332/14 "2017-01-27T20:09:20Z")
It was never worth it to work for such a customer so I understand no call backs, even if they came back up to my original price. Igt seemed like the lowball price is for a good job, if they come up to my asking price they want the moon. I quickly learned that the only way to win with them is move on and divert the time to making money. ---
**Author:** ![Barkis\_is\_Willin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a183cd/32.png) [@Barkis\_is\_Willin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Barkis_is_Willin)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-negotiating-offensive/778332/15 "2017-01-27T20:16:07Z")
No, negotiating is not offensive. Frankly, people should do it more often. I would have done the same as you. If one cost $100, I’d ask if he can do five for $450. Sure thing. ---
**Author:** ![Riemann](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/riemann/32/3133_2.png) [@Riemann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Riemann)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-negotiating-offensive/778332/16 "2017-01-27T20:23:39Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > It was never worth it to work for such a customer so I understand no call backs… Why do you think such a passive-aggressive rude approach is acceptable, rather than just taking a few seconds to send a text to decline the business? ---
**Author:** ![The\_Librarian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_librarian/32/402_2.png) [@The\_Librarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Librarian)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-negotiating-offensive/778332/17 "2017-01-27T20:38:07Z")
Sure you can negotiate on a car, on a house on any item really. But if you ask me for a quote on a project you are not negotiating about a cow. You essentially ask me:“How long do you think this job will take you?”. I give you an answer “X hours x my rate”. If you come back with “can you do it for less?” you are: A. Questioning my honesty, you think X hours is a padded number and it should be lower. B. Questioning my competence, you think a competent professional could do it in less time. C. Questioning my worth, you think my hourly rate is too high. D. All of the above. When you are negotiating about a price that is mainly made up out of man hours you should use different negotiating tactics than when negotiating a used car. Ask if there is a way he can lower his price if the deadline is later; if there are parts of the project you can do yourself so he can finish faster; ask if he can think of other ways to simplify the project; maybe he can use cheaper parts. Don’t just ask for a discount; it is indeed offensive. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-negotiating-offensive/778332/18 "2017-01-27T20:52:41Z")
> [@Sattua](#): > > Maybe not offensive, but a naive thing to do when trying to hire a contractor/construction crew/handyman. In the areas we’ve lived in, anyway, those guys have more offers for work than they have time to take on. You should be grateful he showed up for the quote. It took me three attempts to find a plumber who would even respond to me recently. Didn’t exactly encourage me to dicker. And I paid another handyman over what he’d quoted, because I could tell it ended up being more work than he’d anticipated and I felt bad for him. My entrepreneurial strategy books aren’t exactly flying off the shelves. ---
**Author:** ![stolatt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@stolatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stolatt)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-negotiating-offensive/778332/19 "2017-01-27T20:54:04Z")
Was his quote unreasonable for his trade? If it wasn’t, then it is kind of rude. Contractors don’t call back if they feel like they’ve already wasted their time. ---
**Author:** ![harmonicamoon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/65b543/32.png) [@harmonicamoon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmonicamoon)\ **Post date:** [January 27, 2017, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-negotiating-offensive/778332/20 "2017-01-27T21:02:56Z")
Always good to ask. But be polite. Apparently he wasn’t hungry for work. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-negotiating-offensive/778332.md?page=2)