# Is personal pride ever a good thing? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 9, 2011, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-personal-pride-ever-a-good-thing/566997 "2011-01-09T17:50:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2011, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-personal-pride-ever-a-good-thing/566997/1 "2011-01-09T17:50:40Z")
If you believe it is, please give examples. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2011, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-personal-pride-ever-a-good-thing/566997/2 "2011-01-09T17:59:38Z")
Why would it be a bad thing? If taken to extreme, then it can become arrogance, but I see nothing wrong with pride. Do you mean examples of when it’s OK to be proud of yourself? I think lots of things are OK to be proud of–it’s probably just the amount that’s the issue. ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2011, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-personal-pride-ever-a-good-thing/566997/3 "2011-01-09T17:59:45Z")
I surrendered a child to adoption, as a teenager. I am not proud of having been in that circumstance. I am proud that I possessed the strength of character or maturity to make a heart wrenching decision, regardless of the consequences for me, to secure a better future, for her. Do I brag about it? No, in fact, lots of people who know me well don’t even know about it. But I do take personal pride in that decision. Mostly because I was surrounded by highly dysfunctional people who wanted me to keep her, because ‘they’d help!’. As I said, it wasn’t an easy choice to make or to live with, but one I feel, I think, justifiably proud of today. Oh, and it took me 28 yrs to find myself in a place to be ‘proud’ of this, but I did get there. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2011, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-personal-pride-ever-a-good-thing/566997/4 "2011-01-09T18:14:10Z")
A certain amount of pride will motivate you to stand up for yourself, or for you to try to better your situation. With no pride, you’ll let yourself be trampled on because you think you deserve it, you won’t try to better yourself because you’ll assume you are incapable of doing so. Like **Freudian Slit** says, it’s taking pride to extremes that is destructive; or false pride. Pride in itself is neither good nor bad. Emotions are like that; absolutism like “Anger is bad! Pride is bad! Love is good! Lust is bad!” doesn’t work very well. ---
**Author:** ![cuauhtemoc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecb155/32.png) [@cuauhtemoc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cuauhtemoc)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2011, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-personal-pride-ever-a-good-thing/566997/5 "2011-01-09T18:36:14Z")
No, it’s never a good thing. Especially if you suck. ---
**Author:** ![xoferew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/e9a140/32.png) [@xoferew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xoferew)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2011, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-personal-pride-ever-a-good-thing/566997/6 "2011-01-09T19:02:02Z")
I try to develop pride in my preschool students. Pride in a job well done or a challenge attempted is an internal reward, much better I think then external rewards like stickers or praise. “It was not okay that you did X, but I’m proud of you for telling me you did it. That was brave and responsible. Do you feel proud of yourself for being brave and telling me? Now I can clean up the broken glass and no one will get hurt.” “Wow, you could have drawn flowers which is easy for you, but you challenged yourself and drew a bicycle! Look at all those details! Sure, next time you can work on connecting the parts all together. I bet you feel proud of yourself for trying something new and difficult!” Feeling proud of their own efforts will hopefully help them keep moving forward even if they later have crappy teachers or bosses or no one reads the novel they write or they are socially isolated with no one to pat them on the back. I’m not talking about mushy “self-esteem building” but feeling good about doing something new or hard or scary, or doing your best when it makes sense to. Of course it’s also different from feeling pride in being rich or pretty or smart or talented. You were just lucky to have those things. You can feel justifiable pride in studying hard to get the most out of your intelligence or developing your talents, imho. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2011, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-personal-pride-ever-a-good-thing/566997/7 "2011-01-09T19:03:13Z")
I think that’s a pretty good way of teaching your kids, **xoferew**. I know a lot of people talk about how self-esteem is TOO high among kids now, but it sounds like you’re doing a good job with your students. You should feel…dare I say it?..pride! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Ravenman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ravenman/32/2929_2.png) [@Ravenman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ravenman)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2011, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-personal-pride-ever-a-good-thing/566997/8 "2011-01-09T19:03:26Z")
I think there’s a fair amount of overlap between pride and courage. Plus, dealing with people with no pride in themselves is a serious headache. Do we really want a world full of people with no self-esteem? Ugh. ---
**Author:** ![Moonlitherial](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4bbf92/32.png) [@Moonlitherial](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moonlitherial)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2011, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-personal-pride-ever-a-good-thing/566997/9 "2011-01-09T19:21:30Z")
Pride in yourself and your accomplishments is one of the motivating factors for you to do better. It’s a lot more effective than the fear that motivates those with low or no self esteem too. Like any other good thing, taken to extremes it morphs into something less attractive and sometimes damaging. False pride and arrogance actually limit your accomplishments because why would you strive to change when you’re alread perfect? ---
**Author:** ![NinetyWt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/cc9497/32.png) [@NinetyWt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinetyWt)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2011, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-personal-pride-ever-a-good-thing/566997/10 "2011-01-09T20:38:32Z")
You’d have to have a little pride in yourself to take care of your basic health and hygiene, wouldn’t you? In order to take good care of your relationships as well as your possessions, too. I think personal pride is necessary. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2011, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-personal-pride-ever-a-good-thing/566997/11 "2011-01-09T23:26:14Z")
Ok, thanks for the input guys. You make good points. I guess I’m struggling over semantics. It seems like to me that the only time I notice pride anymore is when it’s bad. Like say a degreed laid off professional not taking a job at McDonald’s because he feels the job is beneath him. Even tho’ the jobs in his particular field have dried up. You know, stuff like that really sticks in my craw. ---
**Author:** ![Otara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a88e4f/32.png) [@Otara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otara)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2011, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-personal-pride-ever-a-good-thing/566997/12 "2011-01-10T00:21:39Z")
Thats more hubris, laziness or denial than what Id consider personal pride. Otara ---
**Author:** ![Jaledin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Jaledin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jaledin)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2011, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-personal-pride-ever-a-good-thing/566997/13 "2011-01-10T00:39:36Z")
I consider pride in the OP sense to be equivalent to arrogance or over-estimation of the self. I’ve never found it appropriate to be the biggest champion of oneself, and avoid people who seem to think differently of themselves. Self-respect is different, however, and always a vital quality. And it is not a real component of any mortal sin, either, which is nice. I’d rather have some sloth than pride – they had a good time in purgatory, according to someone, lots of exercise.