# Is rape really about power and not sex? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 14, 2013, 12:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-really-about-power-and-not-sex/650275 "2013-02-14T12:31:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 7\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![donnie\_darko](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecae2f/32.png) [@donnie\_darko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/donnie_darko)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-really-about-power-and-not-sex/650275/61 "2013-02-15T20:04:23Z")
> [@SSG\_Schwartz](#): > > Men are raped at the same frequency as women. Shocking, huh? After conducting counseling sessions with male rapists, most will admit to having a male victim. The idea of the only way a man gets raped is from a sexually frustrated female who is much bigger than him does not hold true from the reports of the offenders. In fact, most have had a male victim prior to any female sexual assaults. It is that the male victims are less likely to report the rape. > > Rape can be a sex crime. Sometimes the rapist does not have the social skills that most of us do in order to understand that “NO” means “NO.” Sometimes rape can be an expression of violence, as when a woman is battered by her husband because she didn’t want sex that night. Sometimes rapes is a power tool, when a cop forces himself on a woman who got a DUI. There are many reasons for rape and sexual assault. You really can’ t blame it on how the victim dressed, or her age, or her attractiveness level. > > SFC Schwartz Outside of prison, men are _not_ raped at the same frequency as women. Male victims of rape (and female rapists) are certainly more common than figures suggest but the fact is most rape victims are female and most rapists are men. The figures are closer when it comes to child molestation, but even then studies suggest girls are somewhat more likely to be abused sexually. And BTW, I never _blamed_ rape victims for being young and attractive. All I’m saying is that if you fit that criteria, you are more likely to be a victim of rape. It’s just common sense, and it’s backed by facts. That doesn’t mean that old ladies, little girls and 30 year old men don’t get raped, they do, just not at the rates that women of childbearing age do. I still don’t understand why some people are so offended by this. Sometimes the truth is not what you want to hear. ---
**Author:** ![miss\_elizabeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/838e76/32.png) [@miss\_elizabeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/miss_elizabeth)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2013, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-really-about-power-and-not-sex/650275/62 "2013-02-15T21:00:28Z")
> [@donnie\_darko](#): > > Outside of prison, men are _not_ raped at the same frequency as women. Male victims of rape (and female rapists) are certainly more common than figures suggest but the fact is most rape victims are female and most rapists are men. The figures are closer when it comes to child molestation, but even then studies suggest girls are somewhat more likely to be abused sexually. > > And BTW, I never _blamed_ rape victims for being young and attractive. All I’m saying is that if you fit that criteria, you are more likely to be a victim of rape. It’s just common sense, and it’s backed by facts. That doesn’t mean that old ladies, little girls and 30 year old men don’t get raped, they do, just not at the rates that women of childbearing age do. > > I still don’t understand why some people are so offended by this. Sometimes the truth is not what you want to hear. Yes, but people also tend to get upset at ignorant nonsense. Which is where the animosity towards your posts comes from. Aside from all the other ways you’ve been proven wrong, have you ever considered that the reason more young women are raped is because they are more commonly out mingling in public, and also that they are frequently alone with a larger number of men, since they are at prime dating age? In other words, maybe it isn’t because those women are more attractive (something else you’ve utterly failed to establish) but because they are more _available_? ---
**Author:** ![Ibn\_Warraq](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e19b73/32.png) [@Ibn\_Warraq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ibn_Warraq)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2013, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-really-about-power-and-not-sex/650275/63 "2013-02-16T05:37:13Z")
> [@For You](#): > > Some guys, you know, piss me off so bad, I want to take a paper towel tube and … Oh God! Thanks for reminding me why I shouldn’t be reading SMDB while drinking fluids. I now need a new keyboard. ---
**Author:** ![donnie\_darko](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecae2f/32.png) [@donnie\_darko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/donnie_darko)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2013, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-really-about-power-and-not-sex/650275/64 "2013-02-17T02:01:28Z")
> [@miss\_elizabeth](#): > > In other words, maybe it isn’t because those women are more attractive (something else you’ve utterly failed to establish) but because they are more _available_? Just the fact they are younger makes them more attractive. I don’t deny the fact some rapes are clearly motivated by anger and desire for violence but to say all or even most of them are, is politically correct hogwash. A hugely disproportionate number of female rape victims are late teens/early twenties, the peak of fertility. Sources: [http://www.cn.edu/administration/student-affairs/safety-security/did-you-know](http://www.cn.edu/administration/student-affairs/safety-security/did-you-know) [http://www.csc.vsc.edu/womenissues/rapeawareness.html](http://www.csc.vsc.edu/womenissues/rapeawareness.html) > **[CCE hires Lynne Wahlstrom to 4-H supervisory position](https://www.observertoday.com/)** > > Cornell Cooperative Extension of Chautauqua County is pleased to announce Lynne Wahlstrom as the new 4-H Youth Development Educator and Program Supervisor. CCE Chautauqua has been undergoing an internal capacity study which has led to growth and... ---
**Author:** ![robert\_columbia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e79b87/32.png) [@robert\_columbia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robert_columbia)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2013, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-really-about-power-and-not-sex/650275/65 "2013-02-17T02:24:31Z")
Unfortunately, the controversy over “Rape is a crime of power, not sex” has become a political question and not a question of fact subject to scientific scrutiny. It’s one of those slogans that they hang all over college campuses that you aren’t allowed to question without being labeled as “part of the patriarchy”, “unenlightened”, or at risk of committing a sex offense. ---
**Author:** ![donnie\_darko](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecae2f/32.png) [@donnie\_darko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/donnie_darko)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2013, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-really-about-power-and-not-sex/650275/66 "2013-02-17T03:33:46Z")
> [@robert\_columbia](#): > > Unfortunately, the controversy over “Rape is a crime of power, not sex” has become a political question and not a question of fact subject to scientific scrutiny. It’s one of those slogans that they hang all over college campuses that you aren’t allowed to question without being labeled as “part of the patriarchy”, “unenlightened”, or at risk of committing a sex offense. Exactly. That’s what bothers me about the saying, people don’t question it not because the facts are supportive of it, but because people find the idea it’s not true offensive. ---
**Author:** ![Lamia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2013, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-really-about-power-and-not-sex/650275/67 "2013-02-17T04:19:28Z")
> [@donnie\_darko](#): > > Exactly. That’s what bothers me about the saying, people don’t question it not because the facts are supportive of it, but because people find the idea it’s not true offensive. That is perhaps because there’s a long history of treating rape as if it were about sex…for the _victim_. There’s an old, unfunny joke about how if a woman realizes she’s about to be raped, she might as well relax and enjoy it. There’s an even older and less funny tradition of treating the victim like at best damaged goods and at worst like a filthy slut who must have wanted it anyway. I was about to say you don’t hear this sort of thing much anymore, but now that I think of it male-on-male rape is sometimes talked about in a similar manner with “jokes” about how the victim must either have been gay (with the implication that he must have wanted it) or was turned gay or emasculated by the experience. I’ve also heard “jokes” about how being raped by a man might “cure” a lesbian of her homosexuality, which suggests the victim is supposed to find being forcibly penetrated by a man a profoundly sexual experience and not a violent assault. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-really-about-power-and-not-sex/650275.md?page=3)