# Is rape worse than murder? **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [February 25, 2009, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-worse-than-murder/487419 "2009-02-25T20:50:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2009, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-worse-than-murder/487419/81 "2009-02-27T17:37:03Z")
> [@YogSosoth](#): > > You are looking at it from your point of view. I was the victim of such a crime when I was young. It was horrible and I’m not going to talk about it except to say that the belief that I was irreparably damaged was itself a hindrance to my healing. It is entirely understandable, and perhaps natural, for a rape victim to believe that she is so injured that s/he can never get better. But that belief is not helpful, and validating such a belief makes it more likely that the victim never will heal. We don’t seek out paths that we don’t believe exist. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2009, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-worse-than-murder/487419/82 "2009-02-27T17:59:59Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > **Freudian Slit** , I absolutely agree. Just because someone doesn’t feel “ruined” doesn’t let his or her rapist off the hook. The potential was still there for huge suffering; the rapist couldn’t have known that his or her victim wouldn’t be one of the ruined ones. We should judge the crime on the \*potential \*for harm, as well as the actual harm caused in a specific case. I think that feeling of being “ruined” comes largely from the way parents and others treat the victim after the fact. It doesn’t lessen the crime, but it certainly will have an effect on the recovery. I think carrying on about what a piece of shit the abuser is can be very detrimental. A child will identify with an abuser just by being part of the incident. I think it’s similar to children who are told their absentee parent is a piece of shit. The child is connected to that person and may begin to feel like a piece of shit by association. ---
**Author:** ![YogSothoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/8edcca/32.png) [@YogSothoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YogSothoth)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2009, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-worse-than-murder/487419/83 "2009-03-03T00:34:50Z")
> [@scifisam2009](#): > > No, it’s not just that. It’s because you can get over being raped (not always, but at least you have the chance), but you can’t get over being murdered. Yes, the suffering has ended for the murder victim - but so has absolutely everything else. Thats the thing, for the victim, murder is like an escape. Thats why I think that for the victim, rape is worse ---
**Author:** ![wsbenge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b38774/32.png) [@wsbenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wsbenge)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2009, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-worse-than-murder/487419/84 "2009-03-03T00:57:21Z")
I don’t think rape and murder can be compared, and in many cultures both are capital offenses. One thing for sure, the offender was terminally stupid to taunt the parent. In the paper today, a 15 year old girl was raped, her father and brother found out, tracked the offender down, and shot him. I hope their life hasn’t been ruined by it. ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_Oak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/dbc845/32.png) [@Gary\_Oak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Oak)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2013, 10:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-worse-than-murder/487419/85 "2013-01-22T10:58:11Z")
That parent is a piece of shit for setting that guy alight… and i hope she get the death sentence, no question asked because burning people alive is worse than rape, but murder is worse than both I get really outraged when people say that rape is worse than murder (its one of these topic that i would get violent over)… Rape is as about same as getting beaten up badly… I don’t get why people get far more so tense about rape than murder… i tend not to get into arrangement’s with people about this topic in real life, since i will probs have the tendency to attack people if they disagree with my logic > [@wsbenge](#): > > I don’t think rape and murder can be compared, and in many cultures both are capital offenses. > > One thing for sure, the offender was terminally stupid to taunt the parent. > > In the paper today, a 15 year old girl was raped, her father and brother found out, tracked the offender down, and shot him. I hope their life hasn’t been ruined by it. I hope to see that father get the death sentience or life in prison… Its time for law to give mandatory death or life sentience (for states or country without the option for death penalty) who murder like this ---
**Author:** ![madrabbitwoman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c37758/32.png) [@madrabbitwoman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madrabbitwoman)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2013, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-worse-than-murder/487419/86 "2013-01-22T20:49:05Z")
I see that you have never been raped. Otherwise you would know that it is NOT the same ad getting beaten up. There is a whole different level of shame, humiliation… you have no idea really words cannot describe. I don’t condone murder in generally and would never commit it but I have spent a fair bit of the last 10 months wishing he had killed me or wishing I could kill him. So I don’t think they equate but they are closer than you believe > [@Gary\_Oak](#): > > That parent is a piece of shit for setting that guy alight… and i hope she get the death sentence, no question asked because burning people alive is worse than rape, but murder is worse than both > > I get really outraged when people say that rape is worse than murder (its one of these topic that i would get violent over)… Rape is as about same as getting beaten up badly… I don’t get why people get far more so tense about rape than murder… i tend not to get into arrangement’s with people about this topic in real life, since i will probs have the tendency to attack people if they disagree with my logic > > I hope to see that father get the death sentience or life in prison… Its time for law to give mandatory death or life sentience (for states or country without the option for death penalty) who murder like this ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2013, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-worse-than-murder/487419/87 "2013-01-22T20:56:45Z")
There is no right or wrong answer, there is only a personal answer, and that answer can change if/when one is raped. My personal answer is that rape is not worse than murder. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2013, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-worse-than-murder/487419/88 "2013-01-22T21:06:31Z")
Man, was I confused by this Zombie [Doppelgänger!](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=678166) ---
**Author:** ![crucible](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5f8ce5/32.png) [@crucible](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/crucible)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2013, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-worse-than-murder/487419/89 "2013-01-22T21:53:57Z")
Perhaps a point made by others, but aren’t we saying, if we think rape is so horrible, that the honor killing of rape victims by family members is, somehow, justified, since the victim is obviously never going to recover from having been raped, and, actually, must have encouraged it or they would have resisted to the point of death? ---
**Author:** ![Steener122](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Steener122](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steener122)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2013, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-worse-than-murder/487419/90 "2013-01-22T23:34:53Z")
I’d have to say I agree with Beef. Obviously rape doesn’t kill someone, but rape can totally destroy someones life and in essence “kill” the person that once was. Rape is a HORRIBLE crime. Murder is also a VERY HORRIBLE crime, but murder of an innocent person and murder of a rapist, who then keeps taunting the victim and their family isn’t quite as horrible. Someone who would do something like that would most likely rape again, destroying another life, and its been proven that rapists usually get more violent as the rapes go on, sometimes eventually killing their victim. I can’t say I blame that mother AT ALL for doing that to than “man” if you, your mother, sister, brother, female (or male) friend was raped and then you saw that man and he taunted you about it day after day, wouldn’t you eventually snap, or at least WANT TO? I don’t think there are many victims of rape who haven’t had a fantasy about killing or at least hurting the man who raped them. I was raped at 15, and although I went through years of denial in the last couple years I’ve started to deal with it, and I have thought many times I wish I could make him feel the pain I felt. The fear. The years of damage he did to me. I told the police but the detective treated me badly. But this man did go to prison for raping another girl who was 13 or maybe 12, he got out after 7 years, and then moved out of state. In his new state me might not even have to stay on the sex offender list for life!!! This man is going to be able to move on. I, this other girl and I would be willing to guess other victims have the rest of their lives to deal with it. So basically YES murder of someone who is innocent is of course worse than rape (or at least just as bad) but I don’t think the murder of a rapist who isn’t at all remorseful is nearly as bad. If the rapist has remorse and honestly wants to become a better person, thats different. ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_Oak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/dbc845/32.png) [@Gary\_Oak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Oak)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2013, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-worse-than-murder/487419/91 "2013-01-23T00:06:53Z")
> [@MaddyStrut](#): > > As for the situation referenced in the OP, I cut the woman some (SOME) slack because it was her 13 year old daughter. I’m sure she doesn’t wish her daughter would have been murdered rather than raped, but there’s got to be an awful lot of trauma seeing something happen to her daughter, who was so very young. Despite any trauma that the daughter got, there no bloody excuse for that women to do anything like this, and I hope she get life jail sentience at the minimum (if she’s in a state or country without death sentience) or my preferred way the death sentience. If I were the judge, i would have no hesitant to put her to death ---
**Author:** ![colander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e8c25b/32.png) [@colander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/colander)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2013, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-worse-than-murder/487419/92 "2013-01-23T00:53:53Z")
> [@Gary\_Oak](#): > > Despite any trauma that the daughter got, there no bloody excuse for that women to do anything like this, and I hope she get life jail sentience at the minimum (if she’s in a state or country without death sentience) or my preferred way the death sentience. If I were the judge, i would have no hesitant to put her to death I feel newfound sympathy for Ash Ketchum. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2013, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-worse-than-murder/487419/93 "2013-01-23T01:36:46Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > Man, was I confused by this Zombie [Doppelgänger!](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=678166) It snatched me up as well! ---
**Author:** ![Cheshire\_Human](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Cheshire\_Human](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheshire_Human)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2013, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-worse-than-murder/487419/94 "2013-01-23T04:08:06Z")
So many n00bs, so [del]many[/del] few _ **Braaaaaiiiiiinnnnnns!!!** _ ---
**Author:** ![Steener122](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Steener122](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steener122)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2013, 9:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-worse-than-murder/487419/95 "2013-01-23T09:47:13Z")
> [@Cheshire\_Human](#): > > So many n00bs, so [del]many[/del] few _ **Braaaaaiiiiiinnnnnns!!!** _ What? Are us noobs hated or something? ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2013, 10:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-worse-than-murder/487419/96 "2013-01-23T10:05:41Z")
> [@Steener122](#): > > What? Are us noobs hated or something? Not hated, just your _braaaaaaaains_ are still tastier and tenderer. We thrive on your delicate greymatter, sustains us y’know. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Steener122](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Steener122](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steener122)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2013, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-worse-than-murder/487419/97 "2013-01-23T19:07:05Z")
> [@kambuckta](#): > > Not hated, just your _braaaaaaaains_ are still tastier and tenderer. We thrive on your delicate greymatter, sustains us y’know. 😛 Should I wear a helmet before I get on the message boards for awhile until my noob brain isn’t as appealing to eat? I wouldn’t want to get my brain munched on.:eek:😉 ---
**Author:** ![Cheshire\_Human](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Cheshire\_Human](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheshire_Human)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2013, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-worse-than-murder/487419/98 "2013-01-24T03:11:51Z")
> [@Steener122](#): > > What? Are us noobs hated or something? N00bs? No. N00bs who pointlessly ressurect 3 or 4 year old dead zombie threads? And then _ARGUE_ about the long dead issue? Yes. If the shoe fits, rot in it. But you won’t find any brains in that shoe. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2013, 8:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-worse-than-murder/487419/99 "2013-01-24T08:18:00Z")
> [@Steener122](#): > > I don’t think there are many victims of rape who haven’t had a fantasy about killing or at least hurting the man who raped them. Two things:1) Not many, but they do exist. I’m one of them. 2) Got to love the explicit assumption that it’s only men who rape. ---
**Author:** ![stui\_magpie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stui_magpie/32/11010_2.png) [@stui\_magpie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stui_magpie)\ **Post date:** [January 24, 2013, 8:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-worse-than-murder/487419/100 "2013-01-24T08:37:38Z")
Geeez, nice topic. Murder is worse than Rape because Murder extinguishes a life. The person is dead and has no opportunity to fulfil their live potential. That’s not to suggest that Rape is by any way good. Depending on the circumstances of the rape, some women who are raped can eventually put that behind them and live normal lives after counselling and therapy. On the other hand, for some rape victim’s Death would have been a preferable outcome. In a murder it’s the family and friends who have to take the pain, the dead person doesn’t. In a rape, the victim has to live with it for the rest of their life and so does their family. nasty situation either way. edit, just noticed the comment about raising old threads. Sorry, didn’t realise how old it was I read the OP and a few of the next ones, skimmed the rest. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-rape-worse-than-murder/487419.md?page=4)