# Is sex instinctual in humans? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [June 20, 2003, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-instinctual-in-humans/183215 "2003-06-20T17:42:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![godzillatemple](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/49beb7/32.png) [@godzillatemple](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/godzillatemple)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2003, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-instinctual-in-humans/183215/1 "2003-06-20T17:42:07Z")
Call it the “Blue Lagoon” scenario if you like: Two children, one male and one female, are stranded together on an otherwise deserted island. They grow up into healthy, attractive teenagers. Assuming they actually found each other attractive, would they ever be able to figure out that, er, “Tab A goes into Slot B” without anybody to tell or show them? In the animal kingdom, I assume it’s a combination of instinct and scent clues. What about with humans, though? Regards, Barry ---
**Author:** ![Shrinking\_Violet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@Shrinking\_Violet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shrinking_Violet)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2003, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-instinctual-in-humans/183215/2 "2003-06-20T17:47:32Z")
I’d have said it’s exactly the same with humans who _are_, after all, part of “the animal kingdom”! 🙂 Julie ---
**Author:** ![godzillatemple](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/49beb7/32.png) [@godzillatemple](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/godzillatemple)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2003, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-instinctual-in-humans/183215/3 "2003-06-20T17:49:54Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Shrinking Violet \* > **I’d have said it’s exactly the same with humans who _are_, after all, part of “the animal kingdom”! 🙂** Sorry – I should have said “In the _rest of_ the animal kingdom…” Barry ---
**Author:** ![troub](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troub/32/14802_2.png) [@troub](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/troub)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2003, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-instinctual-in-humans/183215/4 "2003-06-20T18:09:22Z")
I would assume that both would know what feels good. I don’t think there would be any problem. ---
**Author:** ![Jonathan\_Chance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jonathan_chance/32/701_2.png) [@Jonathan\_Chance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonathan_Chance)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2003, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-instinctual-in-humans/183215/5 "2003-06-20T18:31:01Z")
No, humans are fairly instinct-limited due to our long-term developmental process, as I recall (find me another large mammal that takes 20 years for full maturity!) Yes, they’d be able to figure out what ‘felt good’. But leaping from there to ‘Hey, Brooke, let me put this thingy inside that thingy of yours.’ is a MAJOR theoretical leap without someone or thing lending a clue. ---
**Author:** ![godzillatemple](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/49beb7/32.png) [@godzillatemple](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/godzillatemple)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2003, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-instinctual-in-humans/183215/6 "2003-06-20T18:38:12Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jonathan Chance \* > \*\*Yes, they’d be able to figure out what ‘felt good’. But leaping from there to ‘Hey, Brooke, let me put this thingy inside that thingy of yours.’ is a MAJOR theoretical leap without someone or thing lending a clue. \*\* Well, that’s pretty much what I was thinking, to be honest. Barry ---
**Author:** ![Shrinking\_Violet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@Shrinking\_Violet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shrinking_Violet)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2003, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-instinctual-in-humans/183215/7 "2003-06-20T19:06:31Z")
I have to say I _instinctively_ disagree, Jonathan … I’m thinking in particular of the repressed Victorian era in Britain, when sex education was pretty much non-existent, and the subject was certainly never broached in the home - but youngsters _still_ managed to produce babies (thank heavens, or I wouldn’t be nere! ;)). Julie ---
**Author:** ![Jonathan\_Chance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jonathan_chance/32/701_2.png) [@Jonathan\_Chance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonathan_Chance)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2003, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-instinctual-in-humans/183215/8 "2003-06-20T19:19:28Z")
Formal sex education was certainly limited, yes. But actual sex education? Very doubtful that anyone in the Victorian era went to the altar not knowing what went where. Even if their parents hadn’t told them (‘close your eyes and think of England’) then it certainly would have been bruited about on the rumor mill and the playground grapevine. I agree that the Victorian era had sexual repression as one of its hallmarks but don’t forget that prostitution and extra-marital affairs were rampant at the time as well. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2003, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-instinctual-in-humans/183215/9 "2003-06-20T19:32:58Z")
Seems to me that even with zero sex education, it’s a pretty small cognitive leap from watching the monkeys and/or other animals on the island mating, to figuring it out for yourself. ---
**Author:** ![Jonathan\_Chance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jonathan_chance/32/701_2.png) [@Jonathan\_Chance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonathan_Chance)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2003, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-instinctual-in-humans/183215/10 "2003-06-20T19:40:53Z")
Well, that’s why I threw in ‘someone or thing’ in terms of giving a clue. Even in the silly movie they had dirty pictures prior to their shipwreck that gave them that clue. ---
**Author:** ![Paco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a6a055/32.png) [@Paco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paco)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2003, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-instinctual-in-humans/183215/11 "2003-06-20T20:12:54Z")
I am pretty sure that they would know what to do. About the time of puberty one usually gets interested in the opposite sex and what they have going on there. I don’t think it’s a stretch at all to think they would know how to bang. ---
**Author:** ![Bongmaster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Bongmaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bongmaster)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2003, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-instinctual-in-humans/183215/12 "2003-06-20T20:56:01Z")
I’ve wondered about this before, and to be honest I don’t see how anyone would figure that out. (Obviously someone did at some point!) I mean, try and look at it from a different perspective. To us its just natural, but what if you had never really considered or been educated about sex? Why would think even for a second that your penis would fit nicely, and feel good, inside a woman’s vagina? If anything I think it would happen purely by chance as the sexual urge created a desire to be close to the other person. ---
**Author:** ![stuyguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ec9cab/32.png) [@stuyguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stuyguy)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2003, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-instinctual-in-humans/183215/13 "2003-06-20T21:09:21Z")
I think that sex by trial and error would occur a lot more naturally than, say, kissing by trial and error. The sex organs would naturally tingle and become arroused near the person of opposite sex. This would lead to self-fondling. Two teens who self-fondled in each others’ company – not a great leap of logic – would lead to cross-fondling. It’s another short leap to “cutting out the middleman” (their hands) and going for direct my-tingley-part-rubbed-on-your-tingley-part action. One overexcited slip later and you’ve invented peoplesex! ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2003, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-instinctual-in-humans/183215/14 "2003-06-20T23:35:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by stuyguy \* > **peoplesex** Hey, we have their software. We’re pissed about the Oracle annouc… Uh, never mind. ---
**Author:** ![commasense](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/commasense/32/3017_2.png) [@commasense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/commasense)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2003, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-instinctual-in-humans/183215/15 "2003-06-21T00:37:48Z")
You people _think_ too much. What exactly is the problem here? All animals know instinctively how to reproduce. Those that don’t become extinct. Humans are animals, ergo they don’t need a manual to figure out how to propagate the species. Sure, you might find occasionally individuals too stupid or with too little libido to manage it. But by and large, any two random people, even without explicit instruction or animal role models, would be driven to do it, and do it right. No cites. Just common sense. ---
**Author:** ![Jonathan\_Chance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jonathan_chance/32/701_2.png) [@Jonathan\_Chance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonathan_Chance)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2003, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-instinctual-in-humans/183215/16 "2003-06-21T01:58:49Z")
Common sense is a means to go wrong with the crowd. A great deal of what looks like ‘instinct’ in higher mammals is instead _learned_ behavior (through observation). I think you’re rating instinct (especially in humans) far too highly. The only two instincts I’ve heard documented (and I may be way off and wouldn’t mind seeing some cites) are infant grasping and suckling. Beyond those we’re simply too underdeveloped at birth to have much more. ---
**Author:** ![Blake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a9a28c/32.png) [@Blake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blake)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2003, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-instinctual-in-humans/183215/17 "2003-06-21T02:10:36Z")
> [@](#): > > All animals know instinctively how to reproduce. Those that don’t become extinct. Humans are animals, ergo they don’t need a manual to figure out how to propagate the species. All animals know instinctively how to communicate with other members of the same species. Those that don’t become extinct. Humans are animals, ergo they don’t need a manual to figure out how to communicate with other members of the same species. All animals know instinctively how to construct sufficent shelter to raise young in their normal environment. Those that don’t become extinct. Humans are animals, ergo they don’t need a manual to construct shelter from materials on the African savanna. All animals know instinctively how to find food in their normal environment. Those that don’t become extinct. Humans are animals, ergo they don’t need a manual to find food on the African savanna. Of course humans are highly unusual animals in the degree to which we do need to be taught thee basic things. There was no need to hardwire in an instnctive sexual behaviour in humans because there has always ben someone around to learn it from. I’m not saying this is the case, just that any suggestion that what all other animals do must also aply to humans doesn’t hold up. We are a separate species precisely because we have features found nowhere else. ---
**Author:** ![AWB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bb73d2/32.png) [@AWB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AWB)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2003, 2:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-instinctual-in-humans/183215/18 "2003-06-21T02:23:32Z")
My male puppy (Brynner) started humping things at about 3 months, without me or another dog teaching him. At about 5, he started mounting my female (Sofie), unsuccessfully. He’s still off the mark (and we don’t really want him to yet). But I’m sure sometime soon he’ll get his little weewee on-target, without any instruction. ---
**Author:** ![commasense](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/commasense/32/3017_2.png) [@commasense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/commasense)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2003, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-instinctual-in-humans/183215/19 "2003-06-21T03:08:04Z")
**Blake** : Granted, our two castaways will not teach themselves Esperanto; nor will they build the traditional huts found on the African savanna; nor will they come up with a recipe for chocolate mousse. (Well, not a really fluffy, light one.) But surely you (and **Jonathan** ) aren’t suggesting that when it gets cold our kids will just sit outside and shiver until they die of hypothermia; or that when they get hungry they won’t try putting things in their mouths until they find something that tastes good. (And I’d guess that along the way, they’ll come up with sounds or signs that signify meanings to each other.) I’m just granting sex the same status as a basic drive as eating and seeking shelter (not an extraordinary or unique claim, IMO), and saying they’ll figure out how to scratch the itch. It may not be a performance worthy of Vivid Video, but it’ll get the job done. ---
**Author:** ![clairobscur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/839c29/32.png) [@clairobscur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clairobscur)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2003, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-instinctual-in-humans/183215/20 "2003-06-21T03:49:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jonathan Chance \* > \*\*Common sense is a means to go wrong with the crowd. > > A great deal of what looks like ‘instinct’ in higher mammals is instead _learned_ behavior (through observation). > > I think you’re rating instinct (especially in humans) far too highly. The only two instincts I’ve heard documented (and I may be way off and wouldn’t mind seeing some cites) are infant grasping and suckling. Beyond those we’re simply too underdeveloped at birth to have much more. \*\* We just can’t know what instincts are still hardwired somewhere in our brain. Without constact with other human beings, education, culture, all things which overule our instincts, we just don’t know how we would behave, what we would be able to do (assuming that the person involved would survive to adult age without anybody to take care of him…let’s say it’s magic). Perhaps we’ve lost most of our instincts, which are replaced by culture and education. Then, perhaps not, and possibly the two kids would find very easily how to have sex. The case of the feral kids could give some clues, but unfortunately they’re extremely rare, they necessarily have been brought up by someone at least during the very first years of their life, and finally, I’m not aware of any documented case which included infos about their sexual behavior (and anyway, as soon as they’re back amongst other humans, to some extent, culture and education comes into play. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-instinctual-in-humans/183215.md?page=2)