# Is sex overrated? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 30, 2012, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849 "2012-07-30T14:04:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2012, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849/61 "2012-07-31T16:38:10Z")
> [@MyFootsZZZ](#): > > I’m sorry to hear this ☹ Thank you. I still have my pleasant memories. Oh boy, do I have memories! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Farmer\_Jane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Farmer\_Jane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Farmer_Jane)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2012, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849/62 "2012-07-31T17:32:09Z")
> [@John\_DiFool](#): > > 4 minutes of squelching noises, full of sound and fury signifying nothing? Well for starters… ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2012, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849/63 "2012-07-31T17:36:24Z")
Yeah, that’s like, way too long. ---
**Author:** ![Farmer\_Jane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Farmer\_Jane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Farmer_Jane)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2012, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849/64 "2012-07-31T17:37:04Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > Yeah, that’s like, way too long. Maybe you should bring a book. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2012, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849/65 "2012-07-31T20:29:42Z")
_Touché._ ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2012, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849/66 "2012-08-01T00:32:39Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > It is for everyone if you let it be. For a good long-term fulfilling relationship - and I think I have at least _some_ grounds to speak, being in a relationship for fifteen years and we still have sex 5-6x most weeks, both partners need to be aware of the propensity for real life to get in the way, and for the fact that sex can get boring if you don’t work at it. Like anything else, it requires maintenance. That doesn’t mean it has to be bad or dull or routine…but it does create closeness. I can’t have sex 5 or 6 times a week. I’ve never been able to have sex 5 or 6 times a week. There was another thread recently on this very topic, and I am definitely an outlier in how long it takes me to “recharge” afterwards. We’re all wired differently, of course. I’d rather have good sex once a month than routine sex 5 times a week. Again, this is just me and we’re all different. I know my preferences are different, for sure. ---
**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2012, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849/67 "2012-08-01T01:23:03Z")
It depends on how you define “sex”. And that’s a much more complex question than it may first appear to be. ---
**Author:** ![scootergirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e99b99/32.png) [@scootergirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scootergirl)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2012, 4:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849/68 "2012-08-01T04:34:59Z")
I think it depends on how sexuality compatible you are. I was married for 17 years and for the last three, maybe even longer, our sex life was practically non-existent. We were on opposite ends of the spectrum… everything I desired, he had hangups with. We drifted apart on many different levels, but the lack of it, and the differences between us were too much. My guy now is adventurous and giving (like me) and although we both lead busy lives, we make a point to satisfy each other as often as we can. These days I walk around with a smile on my face instead of a frown. It took until my late forties to find him! No, right now, at this time in my life - sex is **not** overrated. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![scootergirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e99b99/32.png) [@scootergirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scootergirl)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2012, 6:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849/69 "2012-08-01T06:40:22Z")
UGH! Hate it when I don’t notice mistakes and the editing time runs out. Meant to type “sexually compatible…” not “sexuality…”:smack: ---
**Author:** ![kmshrader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b782af/32.png) [@kmshrader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kmshrader)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2012, 7:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849/70 "2012-08-01T07:05:35Z")
Female. I was in a long-distance relationship for years, and the sex was definitely not the big part of our relationship (obviously). We’re still great friends now that there isn’t any sex. That said, sex has been a big part of the short-distance relationships I’ve had, and I’d be upset if it weren’t. Definitely not overrated for me. ---
**Author:** ![Alan\_Smithee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/2acd7d/32.png) [@Alan\_Smithee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alan_Smithee)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2012, 7:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849/71 "2012-08-01T07:46:14Z")
> [@MyFootsZZZ](#): > > Oh yeah, I know. I really wanted to hear from at least one other male that it was “overrated” to them. I wouldn’t feel so alone. > > I should definitely not give up on it yet. Like I said, I haven’t had much experience. Most of you make it sound so great, I feel like I’m missing out. 🙂 > > Sorry if I got too personal… I probably shouldn’t have done that, knowing for a fact people that know who I am IRL read my posts here. But I like to be as open as possible. I also want people here to understand why I might find it “overrated”, maybe get some advice. Well here you go. Male, 35, never had really great sex. Also been on antidepressants since I was 13, but I don’t think that’s the reason. (Though the underlying depression very well likely is.) Being stoned definitely makes it better though. I’ve had some fairly mind-blowing sexual experiences stoned, but unfortunately I was alone at the time. Sober, eh, take it or leave it. ---
**Author:** ![MyFootsZZZ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/myfootszzz/32/12580_2.png) [@MyFootsZZZ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MyFootsZZZ)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2012, 11:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849/72 "2012-08-01T11:50:31Z")
> [@Alan\_Smithee](#): > > Well here you go. Male, 35, never had really great sex. Also been on antidepressants since I was 13, but I don’t think that’s the reason. (Though the underlying depression very well likely is.) Being stoned definitely makes it better though. I’ve had some fairly mind-blowing sexual experiences stoned, but unfortunately I was alone at the time. Sober, eh, take it or leave it. Thanks for sharing!! I’m not alone you guys! I’m not a stranger to getting stoned, (these days not so much), but doesn’t that ultimately impair one’s sexual prowess? ---
**Author:** ![DrFidelius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drfidelius/32/3447_2.png) [@DrFidelius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrFidelius)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2012, 12:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849/73 "2012-08-01T12:04:55Z")
I could ask “Is food overrated?” I like to eat, I have a few restaurants I go to often, I have tried a great number of different dishes. I cannot understand people who view eating as entertainment - the folks who will follow a celebrity chef or spend good money eat a meal made to hardly resemble food at all. I just don’t get the level of attention given to food, special restauants, or strange recipes. BUT, I also recognize that literally de gustibus, and so I do not make a big deal out of my incomprehension, nor to I (publically) question the sanity of those who do enjoy eating to that level of obsession. ---
**Author:** ![MyFootsZZZ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/myfootszzz/32/12580_2.png) [@MyFootsZZZ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MyFootsZZZ)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2012, 12:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849/74 "2012-08-01T12:11:24Z")
> [@DrFidelius](#): > > I could ask “Is food overrated?” > > I like to eat, I have a few restaurants I go to often, I have tried a great number of different dishes. I cannot understand people who view eating as entertainment - the folks who will follow a celebrity chef or spend good money eat a meal made to hardly resemble food at all. I just don’t get the level of attention given to food, special restauants, or strange recipes. > > BUT, I also recognize that literally de gustibus, and so I do not make a big deal out of my incomprehension, nor to I (publically) question the sanity of those who do enjoy eating to that level of obsession. But you \*NEED \*food to live. I see your point though. Sex can differ. ---
**Author:** ![Napier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ce73a5/32.png) [@Napier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Napier)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2012, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849/75 "2012-08-03T02:52:18Z")
Male, 55, married 23 years, essentially celibate the last 8. Overrated. You know how they say that evolution has made sex pleasurable to ensure the survival of the species? Well, it’s worse than that. Mother Nature obviously does not need you to enjoy sex. She only needs you to think you will. ---
**Author:** ![Farmer\_Jane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Farmer\_Jane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Farmer_Jane)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2012, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849/76 "2012-08-03T03:39:15Z")
I think people are treating the question as, “Could you live without sex or infrequent sex?” Not the same thing. ---
**Author:** ![gladtobeblazed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/85f322/32.png) [@gladtobeblazed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gladtobeblazed)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2012, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849/77 "2012-08-03T04:05:20Z")
Male. It’s not as great as some drugs are but it’s still pretty good. It would be hard for me to pick between sex and getting drunk and high and listening to good music. Ideally I would be able to do both at the same time, but if I had to decide between the two? Hard decision. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2012, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849/78 "2012-08-03T04:50:54Z")
> [@gladtobeblazed](#): > > It’s not as great as some drugs are but it’s still pretty good. It would be hard for me to pick between sex and getting high Bet I could make an educated guess… ---
**Author:** ![Jaledin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Jaledin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jaledin)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2012, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849/79 "2012-08-03T17:28:24Z")
Male. Yeah, it’s overrated once you feel as though you’ve had a good run of it. It would take someone really “special” (no, not a retarded chick) to be like _yeah bitch!_ rather than _well, let’s go, baby – show me what you got!_ ---
**Author:** ![StusBlues](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@StusBlues](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StusBlues)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2012, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849/80 "2012-08-08T20:11:39Z")
Making love is about the top of the list for me pleasure-wise, but intercourse itself is a little overrated. I’d much rather exchange oral and manual pleasure for an hour with a partner who knows what she’s doing than engage in more lackluster PIV. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-sex-overrated/629849.md?page=5)