# Is Superman Circumcised? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 25, 2003, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445 "2003-02-25T18:23:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445/81 "2003-03-02T01:09:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Dalghryn \* > \*\*Pre-crisis universe… if his natural parents circumsized him before launching him for the great plains then he would have been snipped. If they didn’t, he could only have been genitally altered if he did so himself using kryptonite-based cutting instruments (ouch!) \*\* Leave us not forget that he could also be snipped with magical instruments (a potential arch-enemy for Superman: The Mystic Mohel!) or he could fly to a red sun/high gravity planet and could have it done there! Fenris ---
**Author:** ![pizzabrat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e9c0ed/32.png) [@pizzabrat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pizzabrat)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445/82 "2003-03-02T03:16:42Z")
> [@](#): > > Sorry for interfering with the tread but am I to understand that circumcision is usual in America with non-jewish people? Why? Since when? It was started as a compulsive practice to discourage masturbation in youth (it’s easier to masturbate with a foreskin) sometime in the 20th century. Now, the explination is “hygenical reasons”. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5f8ce5/32.png) [@The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Peyote_Coyote)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445/83 "2003-03-02T03:35:21Z")
Well, pizzabrat, the lack of a foreskin has never stopped me from jacking off. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![MusicJunkie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df788c/32.png) [@MusicJunkie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MusicJunkie)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445/84 "2003-03-02T03:41:43Z")
it’s easier to masturbate with a foreskin Really, really sorry to continue my interruption but I don’t think this merits a tread on its own. Just how is it easier with a foreskin? ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445/85 "2003-03-02T03:45:53Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by MusicJunkie \* > Just how is it easier with a foreskin? Yeah! Prurious minds want to know! ---
**Author:** ![pizzabrat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e9c0ed/32.png) [@pizzabrat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pizzabrat)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445/86 "2003-03-02T04:01:35Z")
> [@](#): > > Really, really sorry to continue my interruption but I don’t think this merits a tread on its own. Just how is it easier with a foreskin? You have one, you should know! Well, maybe it’s 'cause I have experience with both. With a inact penis, an impromptu jerking slides the smegma-lubed foreskin back and forth over the hyper-sensitive (due to its usually protected state) glans causing enough sensation to please its owner. Most circumcised gents can’t (or maybe won’t) engage in masturbation without artificial lubrication, thus meaning a less spontaneous session. Therefore, I chastize my mother nearly everyday for severly compromising my penis. ---
**Author:** ![Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satisfying_Andy_Licious)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445/87 "2003-03-02T04:10:08Z")
The one superhero who doubtlessly is circumcized is The Thing: > [@](#): > > Still, there was that name, [Benjamin Jacob Grimm,](http://www.miami.com/mld/miamiherald/living/columnists/leonard_pitts/3559109.htm) which invokes not one but two Jewish patriarchs. Then there was the fact that he was from Manhattan’s Lower East Side, to which so many Jewish immigrants came fresh from Ellis Island. And finally, there was just something about him, something in his pugnacity, fatalism and humor, that struck me as characteristically Jewish. … > Ben Grimm was created by writer Stanley Lieber and artist Jacob Kurtzberg – two men of Jewish heritage who worked professionally as Stan Lee and Jack Kirby. …I’m told Kirby kept in his home a private sketch … It depicted Ben wearing what Fantastic Four editor Tom Brevoort calls ‘‘full Jewish regalia’’ …This month, Brevoort published a story that takes Ben back to his old stomping grounds and, for the first time, reveals his religious roots. > > ‘‘You’re really Jewish?’’ asks the villain of the piece. > > ‘‘There a problem with that?’’ replies The Thing. > > ‘‘No,’’ says the bad guy, looking into that craggy, orange puss. ``It’s just . . . you don’t look Jewish.’’ > > I’ve been smiling ever since I read that. ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445/88 "2003-03-02T04:12:45Z")
STOP IT!!! Can we, just once, for the novelty of it all _not_ turn a discussion that talks about circumcision into “Circumcision: Evil Plot to Unman the World” vs “Circumcision: Cleaner, Healthier, Better Sex”? Please? Get to some other damn thread where people _want_ to hear about your smegma or lack thereof. In this thread, we should stick to Superman’s smegma (or lack thereof)…um…so to speak. 😉 Fenris ---
**Author:** ![The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5f8ce5/32.png) [@The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Peyote_Coyote)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445/89 "2003-03-02T04:17:03Z")
What is even wierder, Fenris, is that this damn thread will soon hit 100 posts. Imagine that, 100 posts about Superman’s wanker. Hell, I’ve seen threads about religion & world peace that died 'way before that. There are some sick puppies on this board. ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445/90 "2003-03-02T04:20:10Z")
Erm…the above was _not_ directed at \*\* Satisfying Andy Licious \*\*. And FTR, Colossal Boy from the Legion is _also_ circumcised. (And I didn’t like the story about the Thing suddenly becoming Jewish: he’s _never_ mentioned it in 40+ years but he _has_ celebrated Christmas and Easter, gone to Mass and (iirc) Confession, etc.) I just don’t buy it and it seemed almost as condescending as the Colossal Boy revelation. Fenris PS **Coyote** : It’s in part because we made Threadspotting. Think about it: some sick bastard put this thread on _the front page_ right next to Cecil’s Holy Writ! Talk about “letting it all hang out” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5f8ce5/32.png) [@The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Peyote_Coyote)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445/91 "2003-03-02T04:28:34Z")
What was condescending about Colossal Boy’s revelation, Fenris? It can’t be much worse than that dumb electoral system that put his mother in as world president. ---
**Author:** ![Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satisfying_Andy_Licious)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445/92 "2003-03-02T04:35:11Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Fenris \* > \*\*(And I didn’t like the story about the Thing suddenly becoming Jewish: he’s _never_ mentioned it in 40+ years but he _has_ celebrated Christmas and Easter, gone to Mass and (iirc) Confession, etc.) > \*\* I don’t know about Mass and confession, but he had a way with a cigar that always reminded me of Groucho. I admit that Petunia doesn’t sound like a Jewish name, though. ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445/93 "2003-03-02T14:53:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by The Peyote Coyote \* > \*\*What was condescending about Colossal Boy’s revelation, Fenris? It can’t be much worse than that dumb electoral system that put his mother in as world president. \*\* Condescending isn’t quite the right word, but it’s close: it’s as if DC realized “Hey! We don’t have any Jewish characters! We need a token Jew! Who can we pick that no-one’ll care about to be our token?” So he was Jewish for maybe two panels and then it was forgotten for about 6 years. It’s like the way they made Karate Kid Asian for a while. He wasn’t, but they realized “Hey! We don’t have any Asian characters either. Karate’s one o’ dem Asian things! Make him Asian!” It’s as dumb and vaguely offensive as if they realized they didn’t have any Black characters and rather than create Tyrok\* (gad!) they just said: “Oh yeah. Phantom Girl? She’s black. It’s just that the interdimensional travel she does from Bltzgl makes her skin color appear light. Holy Christmas you bad mamma-jamma!!” Back when Hembeck was funny, he kept drawing Colossal Boy with a yarmulke and tallis. (He also had Gim griping about how his yarmulke kept falling off whenever he used his power.) Fenris \*Not that Tyrok was any prize. All the black people in the 30th century went off to live on an island just like ‘Brigadoon’ (that only appears in our dimension for 30 years out of every 200) and that’s why you don’t see 'em? \< cough \> Uh-huh. That’s like that Superman story from the same era where all the Black Kryptonians, it turns out, live on _their_ own island (Valtho Island, if memory serves) and that’s why you don’t see any black Kryptonians? Say what you want, if you look at old issues of Spider-Man and Doc Strange, you’ll see a ton of black faces in the crowds. Marvel handled race stuff _sooo_ much better than DC in the '60s and '70s. ---
**Author:** ![degustibus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f17d59/32.png) [@degustibus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/degustibus)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445/94 "2003-03-02T16:44:45Z")
#1 Most of us are not circumcised. #2 For those who are and grieve it, there is foreskin replacement therapy (which I suggested as a joke 20 years ago – now available at yr neighborhood cosmetic surgeon). #2.5 People take their comix too seriously. #3.1 People take these threads too seriously. #5. I am organizing a search for Superman’s lost foreskin. Let’s all meet at google. ---
**Author:** ![80sHairMetalMaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/8/ed655f/32.png) [@80sHairMetalMaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/80sHairMetalMaven)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445/95 "2003-03-02T16:50:59Z")
> [@](#): > > you bad mamma-jamma!! LOL:D I haven’t heard that phrase since I was a wee lass watching **Biker Mice from Mars**!😃 IDBB ---
**Author:** ![The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5f8ce5/32.png) [@The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Peyote_Coyote)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445/96 "2003-03-02T17:24:14Z")
> [@](#): > > Marvel handled race stuff sooo much better than DC in the '60s and '70s. Generally, I agree with you, Fenris, but don’t forget “Man, Thy Name is Brother” from JLA 57. DC had its shining moments, too. degustibus: The search for Superman’s lost foreskin. Hey, this sounds like a great idea for an alternative mini-series. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445/97 "2003-03-02T17:43:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Fenris \* > That’s like that Superman story from the same era where all the Black Kryptonians, it turns out, live on _their_ own island (Valtho Island, if memory serves) and that’s why you don’t see any black Kryptonians? It was Vathlo, actually. There was a Superman Annual by Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons (the _Watchmen_ guys) that depicted an alternate history in which Kal-El grew to adulthood on Krypton. It’s an excellent hodge-podge of pre-Crisis Krypton factoids, including throwaway references to “Little Vathlo” (a ghetto neighborhood within the city of Kryptonopolis) and “racial trouble” with the immigrant inhabitants. ---
**Author:** ![wolfman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a8b319/32.png) [@wolfman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfman)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445/98 "2003-03-02T18:34:47Z")
There are whole host of other issues related as well. If a gun-shot to the chest isn’t enough to bother him then, doesn’t that infer his nerve activation threshold is very high. Can an Earth-cooch provide enough friction and presure to activate the nerve endings on the Super Schlong? Or would he require a superheroic vagina to pop the champaign cork. Obviously guess he could get a handjob from the Hulk, but I don’t see either of them swinging that way. So does he have to handle the ship himself to orgasm? And if he has superstamina it might take weeks(I guess he could do it at superspeed but it would be hard to be discrete and confortable with the whole city hearing a series of sonic booms). If there was one guy who really needed a Fortress of Solitude to handle his buisness, he is deffinately the one. The foreskin issue is minor compared the those if you ask me. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5f8ce5/32.png) [@The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Peyote_Coyote)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445/99 "2003-03-02T18:50:35Z")
Ah, Wolfman, but he has super-sensitivity in addition to his other super-powers. Supes just doesn’t mention this one much. ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2003, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445/100 "2003-03-02T19:24:31Z")
Yeah: he can turn his supersenses on and off at will. There was a really cool story where the Parasite absorbed the on/off ability and his powers went out of control. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-superman-circumcised/157445.md?page=6)