# Is that a fat woman gets to see a short guy as "equivalent" a form of sexual affirmative action? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 23, 2016, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108 "2016-06-23T02:26:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2016, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108/21 "2016-06-23T04:36:44Z")
I think the OP is short. He should try overcompensating. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_other_waldo_pepper/32/12370_2.png) [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Other_Waldo_Pepper)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2016, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108/22 "2016-06-23T04:57:41Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > No, he’s saying that it’s wrong not to find someone attractive because of their height, because they can’t control it, but it’s OK not to be attracted to someone because of their weight, because they are lazy shits. > > He is apparently complaining that not even women he doesn’t find attractive will sleep with him. Well, maybe. But to say that women look down on men who they “should be HONOURED to get”, and to call _that_ “sexual affirmative action” – see, I figured the point of affirmative action is that (a) some guy would’ve been picked, if it’d been up to the individual choosing; but then (b) someone else stepped in to say, _no, you don’t get to pick that person_. But here, the individual choosing _is_ the one who says “uh, no; I don’t find you attractive.” It sounds like the short guy in that scenario is the one who’d _benefit_ from something like affirmative action – because, if it’s just left up to individual choices, then as per the OP the short guy doesn’t get picked. ---
**Author:** ![PastTense](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pasttense/32/14550_2.png) [@PastTense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PastTense)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2016, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108/23 "2016-06-23T05:41:14Z")
What’s this “fat woman”? I thought the correct terminology was now BBW (Big Beautiful Woman). ---
**Author:** ![Alley\_Dweller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alley_dweller/32/430_2.png) [@Alley\_Dweller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alley_Dweller)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2016, 6:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108/24 "2016-06-23T06:38:45Z")
> [@PastTense](#): > > What’s this “fat woman”? I thought the correct terminology was now BBW (Big Beautiful Woman). Hello. The 20th century just called and wants its politically correct euphemism back. The current PC term is “person of size.” ---
**Author:** ![Merneith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/57b2e6/32.png) [@Merneith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merneith)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2016, 6:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108/25 "2016-06-23T06:55:33Z")
> [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](#): > > Well, maybe. > > But to say that women look down on men who they “should be HONOURED to get”, and to call _that_ “sexual affirmative action” – see, I figured the point of affirmative action is that (a) some guy would’ve been picked, if it’d been up to the individual choosing; but then (b) someone else stepped in to say, _no, you don’t get to pick that person_. > > But here, the individual choosing _is_ the one who says “uh, no; I don’t find you attractive.” It sounds like the short guy in that scenario is the one who’d _benefit_ from something like affirmative action – because, if it’s just left up to individual choices, then as per the OP the short guy doesn’t get picked. No, the affirmative action referred to in the title - **“Is that a fat woman gets to see a short guy as “equivalent” a form of sexual affirmative action?”** - is the notion, apparently promoted by Society, is that fat women believe themselves to be equivalent to short guys on the Universal Hotness Scale, when in truth, fat women are way below short guys, and should totally be honored to be propositioned by short guys, who sometimes keep themselves fit and are objectively hotter than fat chicks even if the short guys have stank attitudes, but Society is to blame for pretending that fat chicks are equal to short men who they don’t really deserve, just like Society is to blame for giving black people access to education and resources which they don’t deserve. Because Society forces us to all be so PC. See? Simple, really. ---
**Author:** ![Kaio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/c68b51/32.png) [@Kaio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kaio)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2016, 6:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108/26 "2016-06-23T06:57:55Z")
> [@Ukulele\_Ike](#): > > Also, consider short dudes indiscriminately screwing fat chicks. We could end up with a swarming race of revolting short, fat people…_Untermenschen_, if you will. > > I suppose they could be enslaved, employed as house servants and field laborers. Or we normal tall, slender persons could utilize them as a food source. Served up whole and roasted on a platter with an apple in the mouth…might be a fine party dish. A modest proposal indeed. Of course everyone knows relationships and dating are _just like_ vending machine transactions: [ul] [li]Insert kindness coin =\> receive sex[/li][li]Insert entitlement coin =\> receive sex[/li][/ul] ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2016, 7:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108/27 "2016-06-23T07:53:15Z")
Somebody PM me when this thread gets moved to the Pit, because I see a whole lot of seriously fucked up posts in this thread so far. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2016, 8:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108/28 "2016-06-23T08:13:47Z")
> [@Ukulele\_Ike](#): > > Also, consider short dudes indiscriminately screwing fat chicks. We could end up with a swarming race of revolting short, fat people…_Untermenschen_, if you will. I would like to propose _Stummeligmenschen_, which has the advantages of being more accurate and having more letters. You can never have too many letters in your sort-of-German words! ---
**Author:** ![Sunny\_Daze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunny_daze/32/438_2.png) [@Sunny\_Daze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunny_Daze)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2016, 8:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108/29 "2016-06-23T08:19:37Z")
Well, in all fairness, the OP was a wee bit incomprehensible. The thread is entertaining though. ---
**Author:** ![Aspidistra](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspidistra/32/3894_2.png) [@Aspidistra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspidistra)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2016, 8:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108/30 "2016-06-23T08:36:38Z")
> [@DerekMichaels00](#): > > Height cannot be controlled at all… Bring out the winch and we’ll give it a red hot go ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2016, 9:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108/31 "2016-06-23T09:08:01Z")
> [@Aspidistra](#): > > Bring out the winch and we’ll give it a red hot go Well, I’ve threatened to bung a brick on my kids’ heads (and now the grandkids) to stop them from growing so quickly… ---
**Author:** ![Alley\_Dweller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alley_dweller/32/430_2.png) [@Alley\_Dweller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alley_Dweller)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2016, 9:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108/32 "2016-06-23T09:41:13Z")
> [@kambuckta](#): > > Well, I’ve threatened to bung a brick on my kids’ heads (and now the grandkids) to stop them from growing so quickly… I really don’t know what “bunging a brick” is, but it sounds like something that should only be done with (to?) consenting adults. ---
**Author:** ![Sunny\_Daze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunny_daze/32/438_2.png) [@Sunny\_Daze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunny_Daze)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2016, 10:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108/33 "2016-06-23T10:30:55Z")
No, no. In a loving way, you assure the giggling kiddlets that you will have to put a brick on their heads to stop them from growing, They’re getting sooo big! Are they ever going to stop?! (No Mommy! We’re supposed to keep growing. A brick will only fall off anyway. Well, what fun are you! Come back here and I’ll tickle you instead.) Variations are infinite. It means, don’t grow up so fast, you cute little buggers. Children, predictably, ignore this advice. The winch business though - that might be a consenting adults thing. ---
**Author:** ![Stringbean](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Stringbean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stringbean)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2016, 10:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108/34 "2016-06-23T10:53:43Z")
Mistake #1 You’re insulting a subset of women. Aka sexist. Mistake #2 They’re insulting a subset of men. Aka Progressive. #Progress ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2016, 10:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108/35 "2016-06-23T10:56:57Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > I think the OP is short. He should try overcompensating. By the way he spelled “honoured,” I see he’s not American. If he were, he’d know from TV that all short guys need to do is learn something like the guitar, or magic tricks, and they’ll get tons of ladies. That is, many skinny ones, not one big one-ton one. Although, also according to TV, if he would come to America with his, I’m guessing, British or Australian accent, he’d get plenty of ladies as well. > [@ddsun](#): > > Well, in all fairness, the OP was a wee bit incomprehensible. I saw what you did there. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2016, 11:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108/36 "2016-06-23T11:32:04Z")
> [@DerekMichaels00](#): > > and the anti-short-man sentiment, particularly from feminists is pure hypocrisy at best: > > [Alison Taylor on relationships: Heightism is rife on apps like Tinder - particularly towards men | The Independent | The Independent](http://www.independent.co.uk/voices/commentators/alison-taylor-on-relationships-heightism-is-rife-on-apps-like-tinder-particularly-towards-men-10394115.html) > > [Stuff](http://www.stuff.co.nz/stuff-nation/assignments/share-your-news-and-views/10623936/Taking-a-stand-against-heightism) What?? Who said that? Huh, there’s no one oops, nm. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2016, 11:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108/37 "2016-06-23T11:48:53Z")
> [@Stringbean](#): > > Mistake #1 > > You’re insulting a subset of women. Aka sexist. > > Mistake #2 > > They’re insulting a subset of men. Aka Progressive. > > #Progress Yes, just look at all the people saying how progressive they are. All of them. Soooo many people saying that… The cited articles deal with two separate issues. The blog about the office workers treating bosses differently due to their height is absolutely an example of discrimination and those women are jerks. In my office, on the strength of that evidence HR would have to take a complaint seriously. But the “nobody will date me because I’m short”? Sorry, but nobody anywhere thinks “equal opportunity” should apply to individual choices of potential romantic partners. It’s a bummer that women aren’t as attracted to short men as they are to tall men if you’re short, but women also aren’t attracted to a sense of whiny entitlement and one can certainly do something about that. Rather than being bitter and vitriolic about it, the best course of action is to own the shortness as a feature rather than a bug. This is the internet, and there are almost certainly fora dedicated to short men and the women who dig them. Embrace who you are, and remember [the immortal words of Lore Sjoberg](http://lorebrandcomics.badgods.com/random/1747591950/)as you do so. ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2016, 12:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108/38 "2016-06-23T12:19:34Z")
> [@Gyrate](#): > > Sorry, but nobody anywhere thinks “equal opportunity” should apply to individual choices of potential romantic partners. Actually, the internet has taught me that whatever it is, somewhere, it’s someone’s opinion. I once said I wouldn’t marry someone who wasn’t Jewish on a message board, and was accused, not just by one person, but several, of “reverse anti-Semitism,” for lack of a better term. If I worked in HR, I don’t care about someone’s religion, if you want to be my friend, I don’t care about your religion (much-- if it’s one of those religions where you must constantly be converting people around you, we might not work out as friends, or if it informs too many of your political opinions in ways that are polar opposites of mine, well, my point is, I have friends who are lots of different religions, and no religion), but if I’m going to live with you, and have children with you, we’re going to have to agree on a lot of things that probably aren’t going to happen if you aren’t Jewish. I’m going to want to put up mezzuzot, keep a kosher kitchen, and have shabbes dinner every Friday, plus do all the holidays up big, and I don’t do non-Jewish holidays, so no Valentine’s Day, don’t even try. And the kid goes to Hebrew school, and WILL be having a big bar mitzvah celebration. And so forth, and so on. It’s going to be a lot easier to work all that out with someone Jewish. Other people have deal-breakers-- the person who initially accused me is a huge animal person, who must have a dog, and I pointed out that a dog allergy in a partner would be a deal-breaker for her. She eventually “got” what I was talking about when I said I wanted to build a Jewish life with someone, but most of the other people didn’t. Also, the OP should know, that I have dated men of a variety of heights. I even dated a guy shorter than me once, albeit, I am 5’5, and there aren’t many guys shorter than I am. Guy I dated was 5’4. And FWIW, I have a cousin who is 5’6, which is not terribly short, but it’s not tall. He has a wife who is his exact height, and insanely hot. He is also a really great guy, I mean, a real mentsch\*, a nicer person you couldn’t want, and on top of that a doctor, so he has some bucks, although he is in family practice, and chooses to run his practice in a way that helps people more than it profits him-- that’s why he became a doctor in the first place. \*Just as an example, when DH and I were struggling with a newborn, and DH having trouble finding a job after getting back from Iraq, cousin gave us a car. It was an old, used car, that he couldn’t take with him on his move to Oregon, because Oregon has insane emissions controls, so it wasn’t a car he was using, but still, he could have sold it for moving money, and it was a huge favor for us. ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2016, 12:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108/39 "2016-06-23T12:19:52Z")
> [@RivkahChaya](#): > > By the way he spelled “honoured,” I see he’s not American. He claims to be American; he’s all over the political threads. British spelling does pop up from time to time in his posts, but not consistently. ---
**Author:** ![iiandyiiii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iiandyiiii/32/7924_2.png) [@iiandyiiii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iiandyiiii)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2016, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108/40 "2016-06-23T12:22:55Z")
I think rage and a sense that one is entitled to sex and romance is probably far, far less attractive to women than a lack of height. Happy, funny, upbeat, and accomplished short guys get plenty of dates – I personally know many such dudes. Enraged guys with a sense of entitlement get very few dates, however tall they are. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-fat-woman-gets-to-see-a-short-guy-as-equivalent-a-form-of-sexual-affirmative-action/758108.md?page=3)