# Is That a Turtle in Your Pants, or Are You Just Happy to See Me? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 5, 2014, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-turtle-in-your-pants-or-are-you-just-happy-to-see-me/700430 "2014-10-05T02:16:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2014, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-turtle-in-your-pants-or-are-you-just-happy-to-see-me/700430/1 "2014-10-05T02:16:27Z")
A Chinese-Canadian man exiting the US has been stopped at the Canadian border with [51 turtles stuffed down his pants](http://www.ctvnews.ca/canada/canadian-man-caught-with-51-live-turtles-in-his-pants-at-u-s-border-1.2024828). They were presumably headed ultimately to China. (The turtles, not the pants, although probably the pants too.) There was a big shellebration at the Canada Border Services Agency. ---
**Author:** ![Bumbershoot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bumbershoot/32/3428_2.png) [@Bumbershoot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bumbershoot)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2014, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-turtle-in-your-pants-or-are-you-just-happy-to-see-me/700430/2 "2014-10-05T02:28:35Z")
When they asked him if he had anything to declare, he replied: “It’s turtles all the way down.” Well, someone had to say it. ---
**Author:** ![Digital\_is\_the\_new\_Analog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a88e4f/32.png) [@Digital\_is\_the\_new\_Analog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Digital_is_the_new_Analog)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2014, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-turtle-in-your-pants-or-are-you-just-happy-to-see-me/700430/3 "2014-10-05T02:55:31Z")
> [@SiamSam222](#): > > There was a big shellebration at the Canada Border Services Agency. _slow clap_ ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2014, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-turtle-in-your-pants-or-are-you-just-happy-to-see-me/700430/4 "2014-10-05T03:03:36Z")
I see your turtle-pants and raise you [one woman with a potato growing in her vagina.](http://www.complex.com/pop-culture/2014/10/woman-finds-potato-growing-inside-of-her-vagina) ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2014, 6:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-turtle-in-your-pants-or-are-you-just-happy-to-see-me/700430/5 "2014-10-05T06:23:47Z")
> [@susan](#): > > I see your turtle-pants and raise you [one woman with a potato growing in her vagina.](http://www.complex.com/pop-culture/2014/10/woman-finds-potato-growing-inside-of-her-vagina) That silly girl! Everyone knows you put durian in your vagina to prevent pregnancy. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2014, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-turtle-in-your-pants-or-are-you-just-happy-to-see-me/700430/6 "2014-10-05T12:52:16Z")
> [@SiamSam222](#): > > A Chinese-Canadian man exiting the US has been stopped at the Canadian border with [51 turtles stuffed down his pants](http://www.ctvnews.ca/canada/canadian-man-caught-with-51-live-turtles-in-his-pants-at-u-s-border-1.2024828). They tried doing it like a cattle drive, but it was taking _forever_. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2014, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-turtle-in-your-pants-or-are-you-just-happy-to-see-me/700430/7 "2014-10-05T13:43:46Z")
So he had 52 turtle-heads in his pants, then? “You’ve seen one, you’ve seen 'em all.” “Yeah, but this one’s eating my lettuce!” ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2014, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-turtle-in-your-pants-or-are-you-just-happy-to-see-me/700430/8 "2014-10-05T22:50:03Z")
Did they catch him because he had a turtle-head poking out? ---
**Author:** ![chiroptera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/df705f/32.png) [@chiroptera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chiroptera)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2014, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-that-a-turtle-in-your-pants-or-are-you-just-happy-to-see-me/700430/9 "2014-10-05T22:58:06Z")
I saw that story on local news…they were actually taped to his legs. What I don’t get is why so much subterfuge? Red sliders and box turtles are so common here, and easy to catch. I know several places where one could scoop them up in the wild by the dozen for free, and I see them for sale for $1.99 at local pet stores. Why are they worth as much as $800 on the black market?