# Is the phrase "baby daddy" considered offensive? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 3, 2007, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-phrase-baby-daddy-considered-offensive/421373 "2007-10-03T13:19:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 7\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2007, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-phrase-baby-daddy-considered-offensive/421373/21 "2007-10-03T23:02:26Z")
[QUOTE=IntelSoldier] It’s terms like this that make me want to scream “Do you realize how far back you’re setting your race when you say that?! It’s people like you that make racism possible!” to them (when applicable). [/QUOTE] I’m quite sure that if every black person spoke and behaved the way you would like them to, racism against them would still be possible. _Racists_ make racism possible, thank you. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2007, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-phrase-baby-daddy-considered-offensive/421373/22 "2007-10-03T23:05:33Z")
[QUOTE=Miller] Does the converse, “baby momma,” carry the same connotations for you? [/QUOTE] Ummm…not like I think you mean. It doesn’t connote, to me, that a \*mother \*has split, but, damnedly enough, again that the father has. That is, that he’s so far removed from her and his kid(s) that all she is to him is the bint he owes child support to, but probably won’t pay. I have issues, I see this. Also, despite the numerous direct and indirect references to race in this thread, I associate it’s use about equally with “Springeresque”\* white women and black women, although I see the black dialect influence. \*Adjective formed 'cause “white trash” is frowned upon in these parts… ---
**Author:** ![treis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bc79bd/32.png) [@treis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/treis)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2007, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-phrase-baby-daddy-considered-offensive/421373/23 "2007-10-04T00:34:45Z")
It’s not offensive in the sense that a racial slur or epithet is offensive. It is a derogatory term however. “Baby’s daddy” implies that the mother is of loose morals, and that the father is a deadbeat. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2007, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-phrase-baby-daddy-considered-offensive/421373/24 "2007-10-04T03:41:35Z")
[QUOTE=treis] It’s not offensive in the sense that a racial slur or epithet is offensive. It is a derogatory term however. “Baby’s daddy” implies that the mother is of loose morals, and that the father is a deadbeat. [/QUOTE] Really? The term itself implies all that, even when it’s used by the woman herself? How else might an unwed woman refer (informally— let’s be realistic, people are not going to use “biological father” in an otherwise casual conversation) to the father of her child, while avoiding all that implicit moralistic baggage? I can actually see what you’re getting at, but I feel you have the cause-and-effect somewhat reversed— the term “baby’s daddy” is not derogatory in itself, but is acquiring a derogatory connotation, simply because of the growing number of unwed parents, a large number of them _do_ involve a deadbeat father, if not a woman of “loose morals” (whatever that may mean). A colloquial term was needed, so one was coined. A percentage of those identified by that term turn out to be irresponsible assholes, which taints the term itself. (The presence of the words “assholes” and “taints” in my previous sentence is a complete coincidence and they should not be taken out of their context. This is a serious discussion and I will _not_ tolerate any further outbursts.) ---
**Author:** ![pool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pool/32/4152_2.png) [@pool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pool)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2007, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-phrase-baby-daddy-considered-offensive/421373/25 "2007-10-04T04:03:52Z")
Seems a pretty low class term to me. Poor diction. ---
**Author:** ![treis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bc79bd/32.png) [@treis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/treis)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2007, 4:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-phrase-baby-daddy-considered-offensive/421373/26 "2007-10-04T04:16:42Z")
[QUOTE=Vinyl Turnip] Really? The term itself implies all that, even when it’s used by the woman herself? How else might an unwed woman refer (informally— let’s be realistic, people are not going to use “biological father” in an otherwise casual conversation) to the father of her child, while avoiding all that implicit moralistic baggage? [/quote] What’s wrong with “father of my child” or “my son’s father”? [QUOTE=Vinyl Turnip] I can actually see what you’re getting at, but I feel you have the cause-and-effect somewhat reversed— the term “baby’s daddy” is not derogatory in itself, but is acquiring a derogatory connotation, simply because of the growing number of unwed parents, a large number of them _do_ involve a deadbeat father, if not a woman of “loose morals” (whatever that may mean). [/QUOTE] I don’t know about the etymology of the phrase, but the connotation I gave earlier is exactly what I think of when I hear baby’s daddy. A women goes on Maury Povich to find out who her baby’s daddy is. A women who doesn’t know who the father is refers to him as her baby’s daddy. A guy that doesn’t pay child support or visit his children is a “baby’s daddy”. ---
**Author:** ![vetbridge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5e925/32.png) [@vetbridge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vetbridge)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2007, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-phrase-baby-daddy-considered-offensive/421373/27 "2007-10-04T16:31:12Z")
[QUOTE=Vinyl Turnip] (The presence of the words “assholes” and “taints” in my previous sentence is a complete coincidence and they should not be taken out of their context. This is a serious discussion and I will _not_ tolerate any further outbursts.) [/QUOTE] Hey!! Don’t be so hard on yourself! (The presence of the term “hard on” in the previous sentence is a complete coincidence and should not be taken out of context. This is a serious discussion, and **Vinyl Turnip** will _not_ tolerate any further outbursts! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-phrase-baby-daddy-considered-offensive/421373.md?page=1)