# Is the word "panties" offensive? **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [January 14, 2010, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979 "2010-01-14T20:26:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![SecondJudith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5ac83/32.png) [@SecondJudith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SecondJudith)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2010, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979/101 "2010-01-18T13:45:23Z")
> [@not\_alice](#): > > Me either. > > But the cultural context is split - these women seen themselves as women, not little girls. That is fine, it is exhibited in lots of ways. If it is real problem, perhaps they can see a counselor to help reconcile the issue. > > Really, it is not the panties or the garment that is the real matter here. Well no, I don’t think anyone is saying that there is a problem with the clothing itself, just the words used to describe it. I’m not sure who needs counseling or why, though. Or what is exhibited in a lot of ways (the underpants? Surely that’s a separate issue). ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2010, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979/102 "2010-01-18T15:02:06Z")
Count me in as another adult female who doesn’t see panties as a little girl word. I don’t use the word myself just because I’m more into the generic underwear. I just don’t see it as creepy, though. ---
**Author:** ![KLR\_650](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/c4cdca/32.png) [@KLR\_650](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KLR_650)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2010, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979/103 "2010-01-18T15:43:13Z")
“Panties” is not offensive. “Pansy” may be offensive, but that guy really is a pansy, so ---- him! ---
**Author:** ![not\_alice](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_alice/32/7283_2.png) [@not\_alice](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_alice)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2010, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979/104 "2010-01-18T17:25:19Z")
> [@SecondJudith](#): > > Well no, I don’t think anyone is saying that there is a problem with the clothing itself, just the words used to describe it. I’m not sure who needs counseling or why, though. Or what is exhibited in a lot of ways (the underpants? Surely that’s a separate issue). I don’t know that anyone _needs_ counseling, but the nature and strength of the feelings a mere word evokes are sure interesting… ---
**Author:** ![SecondJudith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5ac83/32.png) [@SecondJudith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SecondJudith)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2010, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979/105 "2010-01-18T18:22:43Z")
I suppose the OP was reacting a bit strongly for suggesting that their sister-in-law was “crazy” for having discomfort with the word, but I wouldn’t say either of them need counseling. ---
**Author:** ![not\_alice](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_alice/32/7283_2.png) [@not\_alice](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_alice)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2010, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979/106 "2010-01-18T18:38:02Z")
> [@SecondJudith](#): > > I suppose the OP was reacting a bit strongly for suggesting that their sister-in-law was “crazy” for having discomfort with the word, but I wouldn’t say either of them need counseling. But it seems others online have expressed similar thoughts and issues and internal conflicts. I don’t think they NEED counseling either, but anyone with a strong reaction to the word “panty” might benefit from a visit or two. ---
**Author:** ![SecondJudith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5ac83/32.png) [@SecondJudith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SecondJudith)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2010, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979/107 "2010-01-18T18:43:05Z")
I didn’t see anyone expressing a stronger feeling than “icky”, unless I missed something, and (as far as I’m concerned – others may disagree) finding things “icky” is a valid feeling. ---
**Author:** ![not\_alice](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_alice/32/7283_2.png) [@not\_alice](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_alice)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2010, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979/108 "2010-01-18T18:49:47Z")
> [@SecondJudith](#): > > I didn’t see anyone expressing a stronger feeling than “icky”, unless I missed something, and (as far as I’m concerned – others may disagree) finding things “icky” is a valid feeling. Define “icky” 🙂 I see people expressing a feeling that ties somehow in their mind predatory behavior of men towards girls, and related that to how men relate to them (the woman), just because a man used the word “panty” in their presence. If that is what you mean by “icky” I agree. I don’t think the world will stop if some people feel that way, but I do wonder if it is the barest symptom of something else going on, because it is _much_ ado about nothing. If a woman I knew expressed those feelings, I would sure raise an eyebrow. ---
**Author:** ![outlierrn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/outlierrn/32/3005_2.png) [@outlierrn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/outlierrn)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2010, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979/109 "2010-01-18T21:19:23Z")
> [@SecondJudith](#): > > “Underpants”? Anyway, why would a 48-year-old male be talking about the undergarments of a young girl who isn’t his daughter? sigh, 48 y/o male NURSE, it’s my job, my profession, my previous posts in this thread made reference to that, sorry I left it out of that post. ---
**Author:** ![SecondJudith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5ac83/32.png) [@SecondJudith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SecondJudith)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2010, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979/110 "2010-01-18T23:50:53Z")
In retrospect, that point was a poor one, and I withdraw it. Apologies, **outlierrn**. I’m still not sure why being uncomfortable with the overlap of sexualisation and prepubescence is raising your eyebrows, **not\_alice** , but I’m sure you’ll be able to explain it better than I could guess. ---
**Author:** ![not\_alice](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_alice/32/7283_2.png) [@not\_alice](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_alice)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2010, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979/111 "2010-01-19T00:00:46Z")
> [@SecondJudith](#): > > In retrospect, that point was a poor one, and I withdraw it. Apologies, **outlierrn**. > > I’m still not sure why being uncomfortable with the overlap of sexualisation and prepubescence is raising your eyebrows, **not\_alice** , but I’m sure you’ll be able to explain it better than I could guess. Because it is occurring due to the mere mention of the word in a context that reflects neither circumstance, and provoking feelings of outrage. ---
**Author:** ![begbert2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/begbert2/32/3357_2.png) [@begbert2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/begbert2)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2010, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979/112 "2010-01-19T00:03:22Z")
> [@SecondJudith](#): > > I’m still not sure why being uncomfortable with the overlap of sexualisation and prepubescence is raising your eyebrows, **not\_alice** , but I’m sure you’ll be able to explain it better than I could guess. Personally the thing I find odd is that people associate the word with prepubescence. Is ‘panty line’ something that screams ‘child’ to you? ---
**Author:** ![not\_alice](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_alice/32/7283_2.png) [@not\_alice](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_alice)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2010, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979/113 "2010-01-19T00:07:08Z")
> [@begbert2](#): > > Personally the thing I find odd is that people associate the word with prepubescence. Is ‘panty line’ something that screams ‘child’ to you? Precisely. This is why it is an internal conflict for some women, and indicatinve of something else going on IMHO. ---
**Author:** ![cuberdon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/45deac/32.png) [@cuberdon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cuberdon)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2010, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979/114 "2010-01-19T00:14:37Z")
> [@Cat\_Fight](#): > > You mean the ones she laid out for you? You’ve whooshed me, I don’t get the reference. To elaborate for the OP, Chez Mom, underpants belonging to any female, be it me or her or Annette Funicello or the Queen of England are universally referred to as “panties”. ---
**Author:** ![begbert2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/begbert2/32/3357_2.png) [@begbert2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/begbert2)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2010, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979/115 "2010-01-19T00:16:55Z")
> [@LouiseE](#): > > You’ve whooshed me, I don’t get the reference. > > To elaborate for the OP, Chez Mom, underpants belonging to any female, be it me or her or Annette Funicello or the Queen of England are universally referred to as “panties”. Doesn’t the QoE wear those knee-length numbers? To be panties they have to be legless, at least in my mind. ---
**Author:** ![SecondJudith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5ac83/32.png) [@SecondJudith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SecondJudith)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2010, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979/116 "2010-01-19T00:25:01Z")
There have been quite a few instances of people in this thread describing how they or people they know associate the word “panties” particularly as children’s undergarments. > [@tim-n-va](#): > > It could just be context but some women are offended by “Are those the panties your mother laid out for you?” > [@horhay\_achoa](#): > > Yeah…when we had a conversation about it, I think my sis in law had a hard time articulating exactly what it was that bothered her. She would bring up the infantilization she perceives with the word, but it just wasn’t convincing. > [@BigT](#): > > I always think of panties as little girls’ underwear. The little y at the end just sounds like a diminuitive suffix that you would put on something to indicate that it’s small and cute. I think a Venn diagram might be helpful. SOME PEOPLE (circle 1) associate “panties” with young (up to age ~12) girls. SOME PEOPLE (circle 2) associate “panties” with sexy activities. SOME PEOPLE (overlap of circles 1 and 2) have been in cultural contexts where they’ve heard both those associations, and are creeped out by the combination. I’m pretty sure that’s just what happens when you have a lot of people speaking the same language with different contexts. The OP’s sister-in-law isn’t crazy, but neither is anyone who doesn’t have a problem with the word, because they (presumably) don’t have one or the other association as a strong one. ---
**Author:** ![begbert2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/begbert2/32/3357_2.png) [@begbert2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/begbert2)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2010, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979/117 "2010-01-19T00:26:33Z")
> [@SecondJudith](#): > > There have been quite a few instances of people in this thread describing how they or people they know associate the word “panties” particularly as children’s undergarments. > > I think a Venn diagram might be helpful. > > SOME PEOPLE (circle 1) associate “panties” with young (up to age ~12) girls. > SOME PEOPLE (circle 2) associate “panties” with sexy activities. > SOME PEOPLE (overlap of circles 1 and 2) have been in cultural contexts where they’ve heard both those associations, and are creeped out by the combination. > > I’m pretty sure that’s just what happens when you have a lot of people speaking the same language with different contexts. The OP’s sister-in-law isn’t crazy, but neither is anyone who doesn’t have a problem with the word, because they (presumably) don’t have one or the other association as a strong one. Right. But I still find it odd. ETA - Right to the fact some people have the odd idea that panties mean kiddies only. I find it rather more unlikely that some people both sexualize it _and_ associate it with children - surely the association with adults/sex comes from the context for those people? Or at least most of them? ---
**Author:** ![MarcusF](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/67e7ee/32.png) [@MarcusF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MarcusF)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2010, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979/118 "2010-01-19T16:39:40Z")
> [@begbert2](#): > > Personally the thing I find odd is that people associate the word with prepubescence. Is ‘panty line’ something that screams ‘child’ to you? The linkage between “panties” and prepubescence has got to be a transatlantic thing. In the States do you not have “[panty liners](http://www.mymonthlies.co.uk/myshop/index.php?main_page=index&cPath=3)” - which are quite definitely not for the prepubescent! ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2010, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979/119 "2010-01-19T17:05:29Z")
> [@LouiseE](#): > > You’ve whooshed me, I don’t get the reference. “Are those the panties your mother laid out for you?” is a quote from an early _Seinfeld_ episode, in which Jerry is dating a woman who likes raunchy bedroom talk. One tryst is abruptly terminated when she, horrified, storms out of Jerry’s apartment. He later explains to George that he was trying to match her bedroom talk, asking (when she began talking about her panties) the above question. George is understandably confused and Jerry admits it was an inept off-the-cuff attempt at arousal that completely backfired. ---
**Author:** ![not\_alice](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_alice/32/7283_2.png) [@not\_alice](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_alice)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2010, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979/120 "2010-01-19T17:14:01Z")
> [@Bryan\_Ekers](#): > > “Are those the panties your mother laid out for you?” is a quote from an early _Seinfeld_ episode, in which Jerry is dating a woman who likes raunchy bedroom talk. One tryst is abruptly terminated when she, horrified, storms out of Jerry’s apartment. He later explains to George that he was trying to match her bedroom talk, asking (when she began talking about her panties) the above question. George is understandably confused and Jerry admits it was an inept off-the-cuff attempt at arousal that completely backfired. It was more than that, the line itself is a sort of insult to masculinity - in proper context it is meant to goad someone in an argument. It riffs on the insult “Does your mother still pick out your clothes for you?” The humor comes from the juxtaposition of using an insult for a meant to be used towards a man as pillow talk towards a woman. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-the-word-panties-offensive/524979.md?page=7)