# Is there a Santa Claus? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cecil's Columns/Staff Reports\ **Created:** [December 25, 2004, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-a-santa-claus/281566 "2004-12-25T05:52:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 7\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Hi\_Neighbor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hi_neighbor/32/494_2.png) [@Hi\_Neighbor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hi_Neighbor)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2004, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-a-santa-claus/281566/1 "2004-12-25T05:52:53Z")
Reading this [column](http://www.straightdope.com/classics/santaclaus) reminded me of an ‘article’ I read from an ammusing web-site. From [The Brain of Brian](http://www.brainofbrian.com/philosophies2.html), the following explains, logically of course, the truth about Santa. > [@](#): > > After much research, we present the annual aeronautical engineers report on the theory of Santa: > No known species of reindeer can fly. BUT there are 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not COMPLETELY rule out flying reindeer, which only Santa has ever seen. > > [REMAINDER OF MATERIAL DELETED BY MODERATOR] ---
**Author:** ![C\_K\_Dexter\_Haven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b2d939/32.png) [@C\_K\_Dexter\_Haven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/C_K_Dexter_Haven)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2004, 12:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-a-santa-claus/281566/2 "2004-12-25T12:45:00Z")
**Supermonk** , first, this is a column by Cecil, not a Staff Report, so I’m moving it to the appropriate forum. No biggie. Second, it is against our policy to quote a source in full as you’ve done. I don’t know whether that article is copyright, I’ve seen it around before, but we are more strict about copyrights here than minimum legal requirements. We don’t want others lifting our material, so we don’t allow our members to lift theirs. Giving the cite (as you correctly did) still doesn’t permit copying the full article, so I have edited it down, leaving the link that you provided. Violating copyrights **is** a biggie, but I’ll put this one down to good intentions and let it slide… as long as you understand for future, right? And finally, all the best for the holiday. ---
**Author:** ![John\_W.Kennedy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_w.kennedy/32/1031_2.png) [@John\_W.Kennedy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_W.Kennedy)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2004, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-a-santa-claus/281566/3 "2004-12-25T15:34:10Z")
All these calculations seem to ignore the fact that St. Nicholas is, after all, a _saint_, and that among the attested accomplishments of certain saints is multilocation. ---
**Author:** ![scotandrsn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a4c791/32.png) [@scotandrsn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scotandrsn)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2004, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-a-santa-claus/281566/4 "2004-12-25T16:07:44Z")
That link (and the e-mail that floats around with its text) purloins most of its data from an Article that appeared in “Spy” Magazine about 14 years ago, in a special Christmas “Spy For Kids” pullout section. The original is much better written, and much funnier, and fortunately someone has reprinted the article in its entirety (minus the screamingly funny painting that accompanied it in the magazine) [here](http://www.brainlock.org/holiday/nosanta.htm) ---
**Author:** ![Hi\_Neighbor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hi_neighbor/32/494_2.png) [@Hi\_Neighbor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hi_Neighbor)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2004, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-a-santa-claus/281566/5 "2004-12-26T04:39:07Z")
Yes, Dexter, thanks for the correction. Strangely I did not see the forum entitled “Cemments on Cecil’s Columns.” :smack: For some reason, my mind blocked it out when I was looking for a place to post my thread. Sorry for the trouble! ---
**Author:** ![Nightwatch\_Trailer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/9dc877/32.png) [@Nightwatch\_Trailer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nightwatch_Trailer)\ **Post date:** [December 26, 2004, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-a-santa-claus/281566/6 "2004-12-26T05:54:20Z")
I have to take exception with some of these calculations. > [@brainlock.org](#): > > A bigger obstacle for Santa is that there are 2 billion children under the age of 18 in the world. The good news is that he needs to deliver presents only to Christians children, of whom there are approximately 378 million (according to figures provided by the Population Reference Bureau). First off, I don’t know about you guys, but Santa sure didn’t leave goodies for me up to the age of eighteen. I’d say twelve is closer, which leaves 252 million kids and, using the 3.5-kid per household estimate, 72 million separate houses. > [@brainlock.org](#): > > How fast is Santa moving? Assuming all 91.8 million stops are spread evenly over the earth’s landmass, Santa must travel 0.79 miles per households - a total trip of 72,522,000 miles. (This is a conservative estimate. It doesn’t include trips across oceans, feeding stops for the reindeer, etc.) Secondly, the stops are obviously not spread out evenly. I would imagine that old Saint Nick could save some time in, say, apartment complexes, since he would only have to unload the sleigh once for several households instead of separately for each one. Thirdly, I’m no zoologist, but if the reindeer had a nice big meal before the flight, how many feeding stops would really be necessary? In conclusion, this article is a bunch of nonsense. ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2004, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-a-santa-claus/281566/7 "2004-12-27T04:50:06Z")
> [@Nightwatch Trailer](#): > > I have to take exception with some of these calculations. > > … > > Thirdly, I’m no zoologist, but if the reindeer had a nice big meal before the flight, how many feeding stops would really be necessary? > > In conclusion, this article is a bunch of nonsense. We left 9 carrots for each of the reindeer, and in the morning Sophie discovered that they had eaten all 9, leaving only the nubs behind. So, as far as this one point is concerned, the reindeer not only eat well before they fly, but they also get plenty of snacks along the way!