# Is there alcohol at your family gatherings? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 17, 2017, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661 "2017-04-17T19:57:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2017, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661/61 "2017-04-18T13:27:18Z")
My family is Mormon so no alcohol there. My wife’s family doesn’t drink. I’ve been sober for five years so now no one drinks. ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2017, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661/62 "2017-04-18T16:41:41Z")
My side of the family - maybe a beer, usually not. My wife’s side of the family - that’s the only reason they can get together. Or stay apart. Yeah, they drink a lot. ---
**Author:** ![control-z](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/eada6e/32.png) [@control-z](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/control-z)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2017, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661/63 "2017-04-18T17:35:41Z")
Very rarely. I remember some homemade wine being passed around a time or two (because one of the family members made it), that was about it. ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2017, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661/64 "2017-04-18T22:25:24Z")
Yes. Always beer & wine, probably liquor too depending on the event & who is hosting it. > [@Acsenray](#): > > There’s never any alcohol if there is more than one generation present. Parent never drink in front of their kids and kids never drink in front of their parents. I have to ask, are you talking about all adults here? Why wouldn’t adults drink in front of, or with, their parents? ---
**Author:** ![saturncomet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecd19e/32.png) [@saturncomet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saturncomet)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2017, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661/65 "2017-04-18T22:34:12Z")
I hate parties w alcohol and they break up and the drunks drive home- DRUNK. I always fantacise about moving side walks like at air ports so you can get home w o driving. Or live next door to a bar so you can walk home ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2017, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661/66 "2017-04-18T22:35:07Z")
> [@muldoonthief](#): > > Yes. Always beer & wine, probably liquor too depending on the event & who is hosting it. > > I have to ask, are you talking about all adults here? Why wouldn’t adults drink in front of, or with, their parents? To put it simply, it’s considered disrespectful. Adults wouldn’t smoke cigarettes in front of their parents either. It would somewhat like reading porn in front of them or discussing sex or girls or pooping. Those are all things that might have a place with your peers but not considered a part of polite society. And similarly parents would not want their children to see them behaving in a low-class manner. Only very rich people and very poor people give themselves permission to behave disrespectfully in public. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2017, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661/67 "2017-04-18T22:40:43Z")
Christ, my folks have at least 50 fifths of liquors of various types around, so, yeah. Growing up, there was generally a reasonably stocked bar around, so at least vodka, gin, brandy, whiskey, and rum around. More often handles (1.75 L) rather than fifths (750 ml.) ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2017, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661/68 "2017-04-18T22:40:55Z")
To be clear, this is in the context of middle class Hindu Indian culture. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2017, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661/69 "2017-04-18T22:46:32Z")
> [@Acsenray](#): > > To be clear, this is in the context of middle class Hindu Indian culture. I assume it’s also some finer subset of that (regional?), because I have been to many many Hindu Indian events where drinking was present among various generations. And I mean a lot of drinking. But my experience is also fairly regional (western Indians). ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2017, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661/70 "2017-04-18T22:49:04Z")
> [@pulykamell](#): > > I assume it’s also some finer subset of that (regional?), because I have been to many many Hindu Indian events where drinking was present among various generations. And I mean a lot of drinking. Yes, as is said, every statement about India that is true is also false. ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2017, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661/71 "2017-04-18T23:12:25Z")
A small story in my family history: when I was a child, back in the 50’s, my great-grandmother was a dry (which before this incident I did not know). She lived in the only dry county left in Oregon and did not approve of alcohol. One thanksgiving, as dessert time was coming around, I made my choice for mince pie with rum sauce. Oh, did I get a ration of shit for that from my parents (they dragged me into the kitchen for this). This 90+ year old woman couldn’t be allowed to know that there was liquor in our house, let alone that they were serving it in a sauce (of course, the alcohol is cooked off and all that’s left is the flavor, but let’s not let facts get in the way of a good tongue-lashing). As you can possibly tell, I had no respect for that view then, even as a child, and I have none now. ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2017, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661/72 "2017-04-18T23:28:37Z")
> [@Roderick\_Femm](#): > > (of course, the alcohol is cooked off and all that’s left is the flavor, but let’s not let facts get in the way of a good tongue-lashing) The idea that alcohol cooks off is usually overstated. > **[How Long does it Take Alcohol to Cook Off? - Top-Best.com](https://kitchen.top-best.com/how-long-does-it-take-alcohol-to-cook-off)** > > How and how fast does wine and other alcohol burn off in cooking? > [@](#): > > The conventional wisdom accepted by just about everyone in the food world is that all the alcohol you add to a dish evaporates or dissipates during cooking. It’s wrong. In fact, you have to cook something for a good three hours to eradicate virtually all traces of alcohol. And some cooking methods are less effective at removing alcohol than just letting it stand out uncovered overnight. > **[Chowhound - The Site for Food Nerds: Cooking Tips, Culinary How-To's, &...](https://www.chowhound.com/)** > > Chowhound is the site for food nerds - from expert chef tips to culinary how-to's, helpful ingredient lists, baking science, and more. > [@](#): > > A 2003 study by the USDA’s Nutrient Data Laboratory shows that the amount of alcohol retained in food can range from 5 to 85 percent, depending on the preparation method. For baked or simmered dishes with alcohol mixed in, after 2 1/2 hours of cooking time, 5 percent of the original amount of alcohol is left. But when the alcohol is added to a boiling liquid and then removed from the heat, 85 percent of the alcohol remains. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Girlfriend](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr.girlfriend/32/193_2.png) [@Dr.Girlfriend](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Girlfriend)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2017, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661/73 "2017-04-18T23:46:50Z")
Depends on who’s hosting. I have a couple of aunts who think alcohol is A Bad Thing, so if we’re at one of their houses there’s no booze. If my mom or one of Mom’s other siblings are hosting at least a couple of bottles of wine will be opened… and sometimes one of the uncles who is married to one of the non-drinking aunts will sneak a glass when she’s not looking. ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2017, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661/74 "2017-04-18T23:58:19Z")
> [@Acsenray](#): > > To put it simply, it’s considered disrespectful. Adults wouldn’t smoke cigarettes in front of their parents either. It would somewhat like reading porn in front of them or discussing sex or girls or pooping. Those are all things that might have a place with your peers but not considered a part of polite society. And similarly parents would not want their children to see them behaving in a low-class manner. Only very rich people and very poor people give themselves permission to behave disrespectfully in public. So everyone drinks, but no one respects anyone else who drinks, do I have that right? ---
**Author:** ![brainstall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/35a633/32.png) [@brainstall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brainstall)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2017, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661/75 "2017-04-19T00:42:55Z")
I grew up hearing “A meal without wine is like a kiss without love” from my father. My mother came from a long and noble line of alcoholics. There was alcohol at our family gatherings. ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2017, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661/76 "2017-04-19T00:52:57Z")
> [@muldoonthief](#): > > So everyone drinks, but no one respects anyone else who drinks, do I have that right? Nope. Not even close. There are plenty of people who disapprove of alcohol in general. There are plenty who don’t. Of each of those groups, some drink and some don’t. But what they all have in common is that they don’t approve of drinking in front of their elders or children. Some things are okay to do, so long as you only do it with your peers. There are a lot of things in society you can do but not appropriate in all social contexts. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2017, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661/77 "2017-04-19T01:02:22Z")
Let’s see. My parents kept a reasonably fully stocked bar. My wife’s parents, one sip of sake for the New Year. My wife’s extended family, beer and lots of it. My kids, beer and wine. I’m pretty much the only one who doesn’t drink (medical reasons) and I’m happy to contribute a bottle or six-pack to the party. ---
**Author:** ![Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e19adc/32.png) [@Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2017, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661/78 "2017-04-19T02:55:44Z")
> [@Acsenray](#): > > But why does that make the question “odd and bizarre”? Alcohol use is a normal part of human life. Humans have been fermenting alcoholic products for ten thousand years. Add in this site is based in North America and unless someone was raised by alcoholics, or is an addict themself, it is bizarre and odd to wonder if alcohol is served at a family gathering. Drinking at social gatherings is the norm. ---
**Author:** ![Enola\_Gay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/3ab097/32.png) [@Enola\_Gay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Gay)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2017, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661/79 "2017-04-19T03:07:40Z")
> [@saturncomet](#): > > I hate parties w alcohol and they break up and the drunks drive home- DRUNK. > > I always fantacise about moving side walks like at air ports so you can get home w o driving. > > Or live next door to a bar so you can walk home Uber. As to the OP, there was always alcohol at my family gatherings & all of my parents parties. And they had some FUN parties!! ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2017, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661/80 "2017-04-19T03:22:12Z")
Oh, yes. Her family and mine as well. Beer, wine, liquor, weed. The weed is discrete, everything else is wide open fun. I don’t think I’ve ever had a party where one of my nephews didn’t pass out and get written on with a sharpie. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-alcohol-at-your-family-gatherings/784661.md?page=5)