# Is there such a thing as a coherent gay community? **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [November 5, 2006, 11:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-such-a-thing-as-a-coherent-gay-community/379176 "2006-11-05T11:01:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 6\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![the\_PC\_apeman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ac8455/32.png) [@the\_PC\_apeman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/the_PC_apeman)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2006, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-such-a-thing-as-a-coherent-gay-community/379176/21 "2006-11-13T15:22:35Z")
[QUOTE=FinnAgain] Nothing on the gist of the OP, but what’s a “bear”? I take it we’re not talking ursines? [/QUOTE] From [Wikipedia](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bear_community): The bear community is a masculinist subculture in the gay community. Bears are usually mature gay or bisexual men with hairy bodies and facial hair; some are heavy-set, but that is not a requirement. ---
**Author:** ![myskepticsight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cc9497/32.png) [@myskepticsight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/myskepticsight)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2006, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-such-a-thing-as-a-coherent-gay-community/379176/22 "2006-11-13T16:35:44Z")
**diggleblop** , I think you feel that a large majority of gay men are flamboyant because _they are the only ones that project it_. I’ve met a whole lot that don’t and I had no clue they were gay until they told me. I’ve met a lot of gay men too. And I sort of think they project it to make it easier to meet others that are gay. I think it’s comparable to people who dress certain ways when they go out to attract certain groups of people - a lot of subcultures have ways of dressing/acting to attract others of the same. They have parades and fight for rights because they are not awarded the same rights as straight people. Using your examples - straight fat people can get married. People with cleft lips can adopt children easier. I see no evidence of them wanting ‘extra’ rights, just the same ones as everyone else. And I think they should have as many parades as they want - it’s good that a lot of gay people can accept who they are and not be afraid to show it, there are many that cannot. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2006, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-such-a-thing-as-a-coherent-gay-community/379176/23 "2006-11-13T17:41:05Z")
[QUOTE=diggleblop] I’d like to bring up something, a lot of gay people talk about not being accepted and not having rights. In my opinion, gay people are the ones who single out themselves with parades, clubs, newspapers, music and TV shows, dressing flamboyantly and talking with lisps. Granted, not all of the gay population fits into this category, but a lot do. [/quote] So, people who don’t act just like the mainstream deserve to be discriminated against? > [@](#): > > I mean, you don’t see too many “fat people pride parades” or “cleft lip pride parades” or “fat people nightclubs”, do ya? No, you don’t. But you do see a lot of nightclubs that cater to black clientele. Around here in early May, you see a lot of parades of Hispanic people, and in March, more parades from the Catholics. > [@](#): > > Also, it’s not “the same rights as none gay people” that gay people want, it’s _extra_ rights. That’s a lie. > [@](#): > > I think that if gay people didn’t announce it or parade it around, they would be accepted into the community a little better nowadays. And if they didn’t have all that gay sex, they’d fit in even better! Yes, we could avoid a lot of persecution if we strove to be something we’re not. The point of the gay rights movement is that one should not have to pretend to be something they’re not, just so they can be treated like human beings. > [@](#): > > I have nothing against gay people at all and thoroughly enjoyed their company when I worked around a few of them. I stated what I just said to them once and most of them actually agreed with what I had to say. They could’ve just been agreeable at the time though, but who knows. Yeah, I imagine if someone said that to me at work, I’d smile and nod to get them to shut up, too. ---
**Author:** ![PBear42](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecccb3/32.png) [@PBear42](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PBear42)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2006, 6:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-such-a-thing-as-a-coherent-gay-community/379176/24 "2006-11-14T06:26:29Z")
**diggleblop** , when I was growing up, that was known as “some of my best friends is niggers [sic] and I ain’t got nothin’ against 'em.” Anyhoo, I disagree. Gay people have no obligation to be unseen and unheard. As for “extra rights,” I await your answer to **jayjay’s** question. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2006, 10:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-such-a-thing-as-a-coherent-gay-community/379176/25 "2006-11-14T10:53:47Z")
Coherent?! With all that lisping, I can’t understand a damn thing! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![dalej42](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/67e7ee/32.png) [@dalej42](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dalej42)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2006, 12:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-such-a-thing-as-a-coherent-gay-community/379176/26 "2006-11-14T12:21:53Z")
[QUOTE=diggleblop] I’d like to bring up something, a lot of gay people talk about not being accepted and not having rights. In my opinion, gay people are the ones who single out themselves with parades, clubs, newspapers, music and TV shows, dressing flamboyantly and talking with lisps. Granted, not all of the gay population fits into this category, but a lot do. I think that if gay people didn’t announce it or parade it around, they would be accepted into the community a little better nowadays. I have nothing against gay people at all and thoroughly enjoyed their company when I worked around a few of them. I stated what I just said to them once and most of them actually agreed with what I had to say. They could’ve just been agreeable at the time though, but who knows. [/QUOTE] The average Gay Pride Parade has an attendance less than a football game. Yet, the cameras always show some one with their face painted, wearing a cheesehead, and shirtless in a 10 degree game in Green Bay in December. Do \*\*all \*\*football fans act like that? Of course not. Same with the gay population. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-there-such-a-thing-as-a-coherent-gay-community/379176.md?page=1)