# Is this a nice guy or is he trying to pick me up ?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-a-nice-guy-or-is-he-trying-to-pick-me-up/105395>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [April 24, 2002, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-a-nice-guy-or-is-he-trying-to-pick-me-up/105395 "2002-04-24T17:28:18Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 2\
**Page:** 3

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**Author:** ![SuaSponte](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/67e7ee/32.png) [@SuaSponte](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuaSponte)\
**Post date:** [April 26, 2002, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-a-nice-guy-or-is-he-trying-to-pick-me-up/105395/41 "2002-04-26T19:40:17Z")

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Two points to make. One, as **Mando Jo** pointed out, he may indeed be a nice guy who is trying to pick you up. Very often, nice guys have sex - it has to start somewhere.

Two, the fact that he may be a nice guy who is trying to pick you up doesn’t mean that you are permanently characterized as a “piece of meat” in his mind. The large majority of my female friends are women who I had a silent crush on/asked out/dated.

Sua

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**Author:** ![Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e19adc/32.png) [@Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Barbarian)\
**Post date:** [April 26, 2002, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-a-nice-guy-or-is-he-trying-to-pick-me-up/105395/42 "2002-04-26T20:14:36Z")

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You know, my pal John has a real hard time making friends, let alone girlfriends, because he takes a while to open up. He’s also moved to 4 different cities in the past decade, which is kinda annoying for him. He’s not a ‘joiner’, doesn’t have any real hobbies, or any other way to meet folks.

Going to bars on your own: you’re an alcoholic.  
Want to go out with people from work: but you hate your job and they’re annoying fuckwits that you’re already stuck with them 45 hours a week.

He’s literally got nowhere else to meet people except at the laundromat, dry cleaners, on the bus, and going for coffee. I keep telling him to try other stuff, but he’s just not good at it.

The sad thing is there are lots and lots of guys like him, and I’m betting **Dragongirl** that this guy is one of 'em. Desperate for a friend, let alone a date.

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