# Is this arrangement a foursome or not? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 16, 2012, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050 "2012-02-16T18:49:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050/21 "2012-02-17T00:22:12Z")
Not only not a foursome, but doesn’t even qualify as “watch and be watched”. ---
**Author:** ![jacobsta811](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jacobsta811/32/2893_2.png) [@jacobsta811](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jacobsta811)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050/22 "2012-02-17T02:34:22Z")
Only a foursome if they swapped partners at some point. So no. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050/23 "2012-02-17T02:36:10Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > Nope. It doesn’t become a foursome until they swap partners or get into a group formation. Daisy chain! Who’s the prude who voted it is? ---
**Author:** ![rhubarbarin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eb9ed0/32.png) [@rhubarbarin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rhubarbarin)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050/24 "2012-02-17T04:30:50Z")
So it’s not a foursome if two couples get together to swing but, say, one or two people just stand by and watch the action rather than touch anyone? ---
**Author:** ![RedWood](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f08c70/32.png) [@RedWood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RedWood)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050/25 "2012-02-17T04:52:40Z")
if they are not all in the same pile of sweaty bodies, it’s not a foursome. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050/26 "2012-02-17T05:18:26Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > Daisy chain! > > Who’s the prude who voted it is? They weren’t necessarily a prude. They could be an aspiring slut trying to improve their stats. ---
**Author:** ![Lanzy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/74df32/32.png) [@Lanzy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lanzy)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050/27 "2012-02-17T06:06:06Z")
I hope not, I hate to think what I was involved in during my last cruise when we could hear several coules going at it the same time we were. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 6:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050/28 "2012-02-17T06:43:52Z")
If that’s a foursome, fuck-o-dromes count as orgies. ---
**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 7:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050/29 "2012-02-17T07:04:28Z")
_What_ counts as orgies? ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 7:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050/30 "2012-02-17T07:45:41Z")
_Follódromos_: places where local couples without access to a proper bedroom go to fuck. ---
**Author:** ![voltaire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voltaire/32/313_2.png) [@voltaire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voltaire)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 8:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050/31 "2012-02-17T08:12:33Z")
Not a foursome, but maybe a _fore_some for some, if you force 'em. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 8:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050/32 "2012-02-17T08:24:45Z")
> [@Princhester](#): > > _What_ counts as orgies? Whoa. Judging by a “Safe Search off” image search on Google, fuckodrome has a bit of a different meaning in English. ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050/33 "2012-02-17T15:23:57Z")
> [@Johanna](#): > > What if each couple senses that the other has entered into a tacit agreement with them—and via their sounds they start to influence each other… That’s just a strong sense of competition - or camaraderie, depending on the motivation involved. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![rhubarbarin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eb9ed0/32.png) [@rhubarbarin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rhubarbarin)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050/34 "2012-02-17T16:39:21Z")
> [@RedWood](#): > > if they are not all in the same pile of sweaty bodies, it’s not a foursome. So what _is_ it? ---
**Author:** ![Johanna](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johanna/32/8318_2.png) [@Johanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johanna)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050/35 "2012-02-17T16:44:56Z")
Wait, I don’t understand something. In the “is it gay?” poll, people argued that cyber sex is determinately _gay_ or _straight_ depending on the mental state of the individual participant. So that sex, complete with a defined sexuality, does occur when the partner is remote and only connected via electronic text. But with someone physically adjacent, so that acoustic interaction takes place, that doesn’t count as engaging in a sexual activity? ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050/36 "2012-02-17T17:15:41Z")
I didn’t vote in the other poll, so at the very least my vote isn’t generalizable to anything. But there are pretty specific “rules” for foursomes. At the very least, becoming **sexually aroused** by the sounds of lovemaking not-of-your-preferred-type/gender (a straight guy getting off on the sounds of a gay couple) might indicate that your interests are rather more flexible than you thought. But just trying to outscream another pair because it’s fun; I don’t think that means anything other than that you’re competitive. For instance, many (many many) years ago, my husband and I went at it for a bit in an otherwise deserted outdoor pool at a resort (at night) with another couple we were close friends with doing likewise on the other side of the pool. I’m pretty sure that only spoke to a little messing around with semi-public sex and exhibitionism (both couples had only their heads out of the water, so it wasn’t **that** revealing); the gender mix wouldn’t have mattered to us personally, but both couples were hetero. ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050/37 "2012-02-17T17:34:30Z")
> [@Johanna](#): > > Wait, I don’t understand something. In the “is it gay?” poll, people argued that cyber sex is determinately _gay_ or _straight_ depending on the mental state of the individual participant. So that sex, complete with a defined sexuality, does occur when the partner is remote and only connected via electronic text. But with someone physically adjacent, so that acoustic interaction takes place, that doesn’t count as engaging in a sexual activity? I view it more like porn. For Shakes it was not gay because he was having a porno fantasy involving a women. If it was a guy on the other computer, it was gay for him because the fantasy involved a male. Sex didn’t occur, two people masturbating to a fantasy did. In your scenario it is also like porn. Each couple is doing their own thing while hearing another couple also doing theirs. I see it as no different than having sex while playing a porn video. ---
**Author:** ![voltaire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voltaire/32/313_2.png) [@voltaire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voltaire)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050/38 "2012-02-17T17:44:36Z")
> [@Johanna](#): > > Wait, I don’t understand something. In the “is it gay?” poll, people argued that cyber sex is determinately _gay_ or _straight_ depending on the mental state of the individual participant. So that sex, complete with a defined sexuality, does occur when the partner is remote and only connected via electronic text. But with someone physically adjacent, so that acoustic interaction takes place, that doesn’t count as engaging in a sexual activity? I guess you could call both of them “sexual activities”, more or less. But a foursome is a \*very specific \*type of sexual activity which definitively _does not_ occur merely via sounds through a wall. ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050/39 "2012-02-17T18:27:25Z")
So if a guy friend of mine tells me about amazing sex he had, and it makes me horny, and I have sex with my wife, am I having a gay foursome? ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2012, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050/40 "2012-02-17T22:00:04Z")
> [@Princhester](#): > > _What_ counts as orgies? This [orgy](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=586109) poll & thread provided a lot of responses to that sort of question. 47% thought an orgy required at least 5 people, over 37% felt 4 people could qualify as an orgy if certain criteria were met. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-arrangement-a-foursome-or-not/613050.md?page=3)