# Is this new policy even remotely legal? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 6, 2005, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-new-policy-even-remotely-legal/302724 "2005-05-06T18:17:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![FatBaldGuy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecd19e/32.png) [@FatBaldGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FatBaldGuy)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-new-policy-even-remotely-legal/302724/1 "2005-05-06T18:17:35Z")
Today all employees at my company were given an addendum to the Employee Handbook, which among other things included this new policy > [@](#): > > **SOCIAL RELATIONSHIP POLICY** > [Company] has a policy prohibiting sexual harassment in the workplace. This policy applies to all employees of [Company], including supervisors, managers and executives. > > To prevent such harassment, [Company] discourages employees from dating or entering into consensual social relationships with other employees. [Company] does not prohibit such relationships, so long as both parties mutually and voluntarily consent to the social relationship, and the social relationship does not negatively affect the performance of their duties or [Company]'s business. > > To ensure that these relationships do not violate the sexual harassment policy or negatively impact [Company]'s business, employees who enter into such relationships must comply with the following: > [ol] > [li]Notify the Human Resources Specialist at the Corporate Office of the relationship.[/li][li]Sign [Company]'s Consensual Relationship Form (to acknowledge that the relationship is consensual and not a violation of the Company’s policy prohibiting sexual harassment). (Form follows on next page.) Note that both employees involved in the relationship must submit a completed form.[/li][li]Agree to possible reassignment or a workspace move, particularly if the social relationship involves a subordinate employee.[/li][li]Avoid indiscreet behavior while at the workplace.[/li][li]Notify the Human Resources Specialist, should the relationship end.[/li][/ol] Now, while I am happliy married and have no intention of entering into a “social relationship” with any cow-orkers, this policy is setting off all kinds of red flags and alarm bells on a number of fronts. Any HR people or [US] employment law experts care to comment? BTW, the main impetus for this policy was an affair between the Human Resources Specialist and one of the VP’s (both still employed). ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-new-policy-even-remotely-legal/302724/2 "2005-05-06T18:37:50Z")
Well since you put it in IMHO… Sounds a bit ballsy–and not easily enforced. Does the company have no-monkey-business-police stalking all employees after hours? I mean, Public Display of Affection really has no place at work anyway – a “no Making out on company premises” rule would cover that one. As for sexual harassment, you pretty much need to document harassing events if you want it to stick–YMMV–and it’d be pretty difficult to document anything like that if you’re simultaneously romantically involved with someone. Sounds to me like someone in HR is just trying to figure out which chicks are single & available. ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-new-policy-even-remotely-legal/302724/3 "2005-05-06T18:43:03Z")
Sounds to me like they’re just trying to cover their asses. That way, if someone comes to HR and says that they’ve been sexually harassed by an ex-boyfriend who happens to be an employee of the company, they can ask, “Did you get this relationship approved by the Director of HR?” I don’t know how much weight that would hold in court, though. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-new-policy-even-remotely-legal/302724/4 "2005-05-06T18:43:03Z")
No way is that legal. It isn’t any of the company’s business, especially if the relationship doesn’t go up and down the same chain of command. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-new-policy-even-remotely-legal/302724/5 "2005-05-06T18:47:03Z")
The fact that this… > [@](#): > > 1. Agree to possible reassignment or a workspace move, particularly if the social relationship involves a subordinate employee. … doesn’t say “… if your work performance suffers, or people start to gossip about you” should be of great concern. That line says, we can move you if we want to because you’re dating somebody in the same building. Here’s your cardboard box, you’re going to be working out of the Oxnard office from now on." ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-new-policy-even-remotely-legal/302724/6 "2005-05-06T18:51:44Z")
I’d go inform the Human Resources Specialist of my relationship with an office hottie who would have nothing to do with me, sign the papers, then go show her. “See, Human Resources says we’re dating, so you have to go out with me!” ---
**Author:** ![Cornelius\_Tuggerson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/13edae/32.png) [@Cornelius\_Tuggerson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cornelius_Tuggerson)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-new-policy-even-remotely-legal/302724/7 "2005-05-06T19:13:20Z")
This is an awesome policy. I just think that individual companies should not be trusted with keeping track of who is dating who. It would work better if the federal goverment took care of it. ---
**Author:** ![davenportavenger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/5f8ce5/32.png) [@davenportavenger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davenportavenger)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-new-policy-even-remotely-legal/302724/8 "2005-05-06T19:22:57Z")
What a mood-killer. I think we’d all be better off if everyone treated work like me, if everyone was completely non-social and didn’t treat their co-workers as anything but complicated machines. I don’t have an attraction to anyone at work because I don’t have that part of my brain turned on when I’m at work. I don’t gossip, I don’t flirt, I don’t participate in office politics because to me it doesn’t matter, it’s all negligible and simply something to be struggled through until I can go home to my real life and real friends. ---
**Author:** ![usar\_jag](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/f0a364/32.png) [@usar\_jag](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/usar_jag)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-new-policy-even-remotely-legal/302724/9 "2005-05-06T19:38:34Z")
> [@FatBaldGuy](#): > > Any HR people or [US] employment law experts care to comment? Evil Director of Human Resources checking in… (well, not really evil–I’m like the Diet Coke of evil.) This policy is perfectly legal. Although, I think it’s a bit overboard. My company has a similar policy, but only requires notification if the relationship occurs within the same supervisory chain, it needs to be reported to either Management or Human Resources. The policy alludes to the fact that the parties would be reassigned. Sounds to me like your company just had a knee-jerk reaction to the situation you described, to make up for (I’m guessing) inaction about the relationship in the first place. ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-new-policy-even-remotely-legal/302724/10 "2005-05-06T20:59:02Z")
> [@usar\_jag](#): > > Evil Director of Human Resources checking in… (well, not really evil–I’m like the Diet Coke of evil.) Was the username “Catbert” taken when you joined up? ---
**Author:** ![Indygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@Indygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indygrrl)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-new-policy-even-remotely-legal/302724/11 "2005-05-06T21:24:45Z")
> [@continuity eror](#): > > What a mood-killer. > > I think we’d all be better off if everyone treated work like me, if everyone was completely non-social and didn’t treat their co-workers as anything but complicated machines. I don’t have an attraction to anyone at work because I don’t have that part of my brain turned on when I’m at work. I don’t gossip, I don’t flirt, I don’t participate in office politics because to me it doesn’t matter, it’s all negligible and simply something to be struggled through until I can go home to my real life and real friends. I’m not in love with my co-workers, but it would be a pretty long week if I never stopped to chat or say hello to anyone. I can’t imagine just holing up in my cube and never speaking to anyone. Work is depressing enough without socializing a little bit. At my company, we have married couples, parents and children, etc. There are a lot of social connections in our workplace, but it seems like everyone understands what they can and cannot do at work. ---
**Author:** ![Moirai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/96bed5/32.png) [@Moirai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moirai)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-new-policy-even-remotely-legal/302724/12 "2005-05-06T21:33:19Z")
At my old company, a similar policy was in place. Dating or marriage was fine, but the end of the relationship had better be amicable or one person was leaving the company. Period. It worked very well, and was legally sound AFAIK. ---
**Author:** ![Spatial\_Rift\_47](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a8b319/32.png) [@Spatial\_Rift\_47](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spatial_Rift_47)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-new-policy-even-remotely-legal/302724/13 "2005-05-06T21:57:18Z")
> [@Revtim](#): > > I’d go inform the Human Resources Specialist of my relationship with an office hottie who would have nothing to do with me, sign the papers, then go show her. > > “See, Human Resources says we’re dating, so you have to go out with me!” > [@](#): > > Note that both employees involved in the relationship must submit a completed form. Other than that minor detail, it’s a great plan! And **FBG** , if you really want to demonstrate how absurdly overboard this is, exploit the ambiguity of “consensual social relationships,” and get everyone in that office to whom you’ve ever so much as said “Hi” to go in there and fill out one of these forms with you. ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-new-policy-even-remotely-legal/302724/14 "2005-05-06T21:58:01Z")
Whiskey Tango Foxtrot? What is considered a social relationship? Reminds me of that old _Onion_ article: “Alabama Judge Outlaws Same-Sex Friendships” are they including dating and any/all sexual relationships? what about just friends? what about no-strings sex? I’m sure sex is implied but theres a lot of wiggle-room in that wording. ---
**Author:** ![ParentalAdvisory](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/53a042/32.png) [@ParentalAdvisory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParentalAdvisory)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-new-policy-even-remotely-legal/302724/15 "2005-05-06T22:10:17Z")
I would love to see the look on the HR persons face when 3 employees come to report a 3 way “social relationship”. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Random](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/57b2e6/32.png) [@Random](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Random)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-new-policy-even-remotely-legal/302724/16 "2005-05-06T23:14:52Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > No way is that legal. Cite? ---
**Author:** ![Telperien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-new-policy-even-remotely-legal/302724/17 "2005-05-06T23:21:28Z")
> [@CynicalGabe](#): > > I’m sure sex is implied but theres a lot of wiggle-room in that wording. _snerk_ You have to fill out a form? Wonder who thought that up? And how hard did they laugh while suggesting it? ---
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-new-policy-even-remotely-legal/302724/18 "2005-05-06T23:31:15Z")
Okay, say the management goes through with this. Their reasoning must be that’ll reduce friction in the work place, right? So what happens when Heather alerts them of her relationship with Al in May, and with Jason in June, and says “Oh, no, Al and I haven’t broken up?” Would they be required to take Al aside and tell him about Jason? Or what if they don’t say anything and Al is really unstable and decides to wave fire arms around because HR knew and didn’t say a word? Sounds like a bad movie waiting to happen. ---
**Author:** ![Taber](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ac91a4/32.png) [@Taber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taber)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2005, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-new-policy-even-remotely-legal/302724/19 "2005-05-07T00:05:46Z")
“Hello, I’d like to register that I’m having an extra-marital affair with my secretary, as specified by policy 7JR2” ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2005, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-new-policy-even-remotely-legal/302724/20 "2005-05-07T00:29:56Z")
> [@Harimad-sol](#): > > You have to fill out a form? “Please describe the relationship stage you have reached. (a) first base (b) second base © third base (d) anal bondage” [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-new-policy-even-remotely-legal/302724.md?page=2)