I had strep or tonsilitis or something when I was a kid, and the doctor was concerned with the spread of whatever was packing her waiting room with sick kids that day. My parents pulled into the parking lot, checked in, and she came out to the car to treat me. It was kind of surreal. Closest thing I’ve ever had to a house call.
That said, there are cheaper ways to deal with a patient who can’t get into the doctor’s office. I would have suggested an ambutol, which isn’t nearly as expensive as an ER visit.
Seriously. I’m willing to help people, but if someone tries this shit, the nurse who ran the 1:00-3:00 clinic, dadgummit, she’s three counties away by 3:02.
Isn’t everyone lucky that I didn’t have to go there? Never flipped out on her, but would have if she refused to let us come in to the office. What is the point of having a family doctor if you can never see him, even after 2 days of trying? It’s not an unreasonable request. Ultimately, she didn’t think so either, so… yeah.
Is it her job to deny me a doctor’s appointment? I’m asking seriously. My husband was not in an emergency. He didn’t need an emergency room. He needed to see a doctor to get test orders. Why do some office personnel have to be so obstinately obstructionist, not once but twice, as if seeing the doctor were some sort of privilege for which we should have to beg and be grateful? I was respectful but firm, though my tone would have changed, most definitely, if she continued to insist that we go to the ER. At that point, why be polite? We were going to be forced to go to the ER, right? So my relationship with that office would be over, so that would be that. It was the wrong course of action.
Fortunately, and I’ll say it again, because you seem to have missed it, I DIDN’T HAVE TO GO THERE. When I actually got the nurse on the phone, she understood the situation more fully, and agreed that the ER wasn’t a good idea. Does that indicate anything to you?
I worked as a receptionist in a mental health clinic for 4 years, so it’s not like I haven’t been on the other side of things. So, fucking relax.
While I would generally try to see a patient with the above symptoms, it’s not so clear about how it was described. If I heard high fever, severe sore throat and swelling in the throat I might think peritonsillar abscess which is a surgical emergency. If I see the patient in the office and he needs to be admitted, I have to call admitting, wait 30-45 minutes for them to tell us that there are no beds, then send the patient to the ER anyway as that would be the only way to get him admitted. If I needed immediate lab results, the ER can get them within an hour, while the lab can take up to a day. Again, I would probably have tried to see him in the office, but there might be a wait of up to 2 hours.
Keep in mind that he was seen on Saturday and diagnosed with tonsillitis. Nothing much had changed since then, and that was the problem. The fever was down from 103-104, but still between 100-101, which was the concern. There was no swelling or obstruction in the throat. It was just sore, and still sore after taking penicillin for 2 days.
I told her all this, and did not depict his condition as urgent or emergent. We figured he was being given the wrong medication for the microbe causing the problem, and needed a test to pinpoint the cause correctly. She agreed with this. She thought the ER would be “quicker,” but IME, the ER is never quicker. Every time I’ve been to one, I’ve been there for multiple hours. His condition not being urgent at all, I imagine he’d be at the bottom of the queue.
Or, just to throw this out there, they didn’t have any appointments available on Monday or Tuesday (just like they said the first time you called), so the ER was the only alternative available when you kept insisting that you just couldn’t wait one more day.
I’ve had lots of primary care doctors, and they and their offices have always been good about getting me in same day when I’m sick. Sometimes it just can’t happen, because they’re not superhuman and there are only so many hours in the day.
My point, OP, is that you *never * “have to go there”, whatever the fuck that means. You can disagree with that nurse, you can not listen a word she says, you can tell her “No, we’re not doing that.” What you can’t do, or I guess you can but it’s really infantile and psycho, is throw a big fit like you’re a child, which is what you yourself said you would have done if the nurse hadn’t changed her mind about letting your husband come in. Those things are not done in polite society. The correct thing to do if you don’t agree with the doctor’s nurse is to ask her to have him call you. Is this how you handle conflicts at home, or at the grocery store? And your husband is okay with you acting like that on his behalf?
This is just some constructive criticism. Medical staff are accustomed to being abused and lied to yet the women (usually) in the front office tend to be the biggest mega-bitches in the world. You have to try a different approach in the future. I have some serious medical issues at the moment and I have three main doctors and several peripheral ones. I can get anything I need from any of their offices anytime I want including same-day appointments just because I always treated everyone with respect. All of them go out of their way to help me so this isn’t an anomaly for just one office. I know for a fact that certain doctors offices can screw you over but that just means you need to find a better one if you don’t like it.
Cat fights are never a good idea when it comes to medical problems no matter who started it. I never could get my ex-wife to understand that either. I just took the phone away from her and took care of the matter at hand while she was busy clawing and swearing at things. That is not the way to get things accomplished although you may still not understand that.
Please show where I said I “couldn’t wait one more day.” Really. If she said, come in Wednesday, we would have done that. All I wanted was an appointment! Just an appointment! And she wouldn’t give it to me! [/Suicidal Tendencies]
However, I have to tell you, when I’ve had just a cold and needed an appointment from this doctor, in the past, I’ve always been able to be seen within 24 hours of calling. This occasion was no different. When we got there, the waiting room was empty. The guy before my husband left, he went in. While he was in there, the next patient came in. So, no, not buying that she didn’t have an appointment. Clearly she did, and she gave it to us.
Perhaps she thought he was sicker than he was, before she spoke to me, and was only getting messages relayed through the receptionist. Once we spoke, she was fine letting us come in. I think when I wrote my OP, I was just kind of upset about the whole thing. Watching someone be sick and feel horrible like that for so many days, when you aren’t at the top of your game yourself, takes its toll. Today, seeing that he is better and it’s OK, I’m not as pissed off anymore.
I think I’m going to finally learn my lesson about posting personal shit on this message board, now and for all time. This is it, the moment when I finally get it. Because you are going to assume the worst about me regardless of what I have actually written, regardless of the evidence to the contrary. So, consider this the last time I do this. You’re my witness, Shagnasty. This is the last time.
I did not abuse anyone. Or lie. Or be a bitch. Or show disrespect. Or anything you all are accusing me of. I said that, if she refused unilaterally to give me an appointment, flat out, non-negotiable, then yes, I would have lost my shit, because then, I would no longer be going to that office. Her refusal would have been unreasonable and unwarranted. But of course, that was not what happened. That was merely a hypothetical that someone in this thread suggested, and I imagined what my reaction would be.
It never came to that. The nurse called me, I told her, instead of the receptionist, what the situation was, and she said, well, we thought the ER might be faster for you (which is what made me think she was crazy, frankly), but I see why you don’t want to. And it worked out fine.
Oh, can I sign up for your lecture series on how people do things in polite society? Do they call people infantile and psycho? I don’t know, do they make unjustified assumptions based on their own biases and personal experiences, regardless of the evidence to the contrary, because they have a chip on their shoulder? I wonder if maybe you ought to consider if you’re being polite right now, or do people only have to be polite to you?
I would have most definitely expressed my serious issue with the receptionist if she had refused to either give me an appointment or talk to the nurse. I feel that would be totally unreasonable and unjustified, don’t you? She had the nurse call me. Now, when I spoke to the nurse, it went fine, though the directive to go to the ER came from her, not the receptionist, which is why I directed my thread title to her. The nurse, unlike the receptionist, did not seem overly attached to this idea that we HAD to go to the ER, we could NOT come to the office.
But, you seem totally OK to indict me as a psycho monster based on something I never actually did, which is lose my temper and abuse someone. Does that seem reasonable or justified to you? It really seems like you’re acting out of some other agenda, not what I actually DID.
I just asked my husband, who was present for the phone call, what he thought of my behavior. He said I sounded concerned and firm but not bitchy, and believe me, he’d be the first person to tell me if he thought I was a bitch. So I feel confident that I handled it correctly, and didn’t just do whatever a person on the phone told me to, whether I thought it was what’s best for my family or not.
I never noticed that you were so quick to jump to unjustified and mean-spirited conclusions about people before, Alice the Goon, but I guess you are. Is this how I handle conflicts at home? What, you mean doing what I think is right for my family? Fuck yes. Anything else you think I did, well, that’s all you, baby.
OK, I posted the OP in a fit of sleep-deprived anxiety and aggravation. Things in my house have been pretty miserable as of late, and I’ve been sleeping on the couch for 5 days with no AC and swollen feet. I regret posting this thread and hope it can be allowed to just die off. I don’t have what it takes to do this kind of battle on here. I wasn’t expecting to have to, more fool me. If you want to continue to have at me, go for it. Just asking for some leeway to let it go.
Rubystreak, I think we all understand at least half of the problem. It was almost certainly not all your fault but donations for your finishing school might be in order now. “All in order?” “Hear, hear!”. I will start the collection plate.
ETA: just noticed you wanted this thread to sink. my mistake. I skimmed the thread, didn’t read carefully. For the record, I sympathize with dealing with a sick husband. I’ve been there, while pregnant and grumpy. No fun.
Thanks! I can hardly recognize my feet. My ankles and feet look like they should be attached to the Sta-Puft Marshmallow Man. Bleah! I’m happy to have you interrupt the flaminess with congrats. Much appreciated.
I know, you’re right, but that’s kind of gross. I’d rather have the honey, but :smack: yeah, I got the flies.
Yeah, the sick husband + the preggo = major lack of fun. He’s much much better today, though he’s not allowed to do anything until at least Friday, and he’s milking it for all it’s worth. We’re watching some show about loggers in Canada right now. Sigh.
Well the fact of the matter is, if you’re husband had something more serious, and you didn’t take him in and instead of being home feeling better like now, he was in the ICU you’d be writing a post on why didn’t the nurse simpy refuse any other treatment BUT the ER.
As a single male, I’ve driven myself to the ER with a 102ºF temp or greater. I worked overnights a large portion of my life, so when I’m up my doctor isn’t around, so I’ve been to a lot of ERs not by choice.
I can fully understand you not wanting to go to an ER if you’re paying for it but when I was 16 I remember my mother debating whether she wanted to pay $75.00 to go to the ER as her doctor said. Well 3 hours later she had a massive heart attack and died. It was the most costly $75.00 no one ever spent.
Like I said, I understand if you have to pay for an ER yourself, but 100º is not a much of a fever and you could’ve driven him and just dropped him off at the ER. I’ve had much worse things and handled it all myself.