# Is this the greatest birthday clown or what? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 21, 2010, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-the-greatest-birthday-clown-or-what/536829 "2010-04-21T04:22:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-the-greatest-birthday-clown-or-what/536829/1 "2010-04-21T04:22:26Z")
[evil-clown-hired-for-stalking-threats-and-a-pie-in-the-face](http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/821591-evil-clown-hired-for-stalking-threats-and-a-pie-in-the-face) Basically for a week the clown will stalk the child. Yes, stalk them. Threaten to hit them in the face with a cake. If the child successfully evades the clown, they get to eat the cake. If not, they get cake in the face. I believe this would teach the child valuable urban survival skills. ---
**Author:** ![Lobot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ce7236/32.png) [@Lobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobot)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 6:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-the-greatest-birthday-clown-or-what/536829/2 "2010-04-21T06:21:11Z")
I’m in awe. It’s truly messed-up in so many ways. ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-the-greatest-birthday-clown-or-what/536829/3 "2010-04-21T06:32:53Z")
I can see that there’s a certain kind of kid that would really love it. But I would expect the majority of kids to have nightmares every night for the entirety of their lives. ---
**Author:** ![Mosier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ea924/32.png) [@Mosier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mosier)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 9:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-the-greatest-birthday-clown-or-what/536829/4 "2010-04-21T09:51:23Z")
> [@GuanoLad](#): > > I can see that there’s a certain kind of kid that would really love it. > > But I would expect the majority of kids to have nightmares every night for the entirety of their lives. Kids are pretty resilient, and as far as psychological trauma goes, this seems pretty tame. I’d have loved it as a kid. ---
**Author:** ![Marlitharn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/779978/32.png) [@Marlitharn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marlitharn)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 12:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-the-greatest-birthday-clown-or-what/536829/5 "2010-04-21T12:56:36Z")
According to one of the comments, this is only available for people over 18. Too bad; my daughter wants to have a campout for her 12th birthday in August, I’d love to hire this guy to hang around the woods outside the tent. I guess her older brother and I will have to make do with hockey masks and plastic machetes. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![HeyHomie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heyhomie/32/207_2.png) [@HeyHomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeyHomie)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-the-greatest-birthday-clown-or-what/536829/6 "2010-04-21T14:31:36Z")
Does he hang around the kids’ schools and wait for them to walk home? Can a UK Doper give me some general idea of what would happen to an adult (who is not a parent or employee) hanging around a schoolyard? No notice at all? Cross looks? Some 'splainin to do with the headmaster? I can tell you confidently that any adult who hangs around any schoolyard in the US without a good reason to be there might possibly see the inside of a jail cell. ---
**Author:** ![WolfpackJeep](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpackjeep/32/2921_2.png) [@WolfpackJeep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WolfpackJeep)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-the-greatest-birthday-clown-or-what/536829/7 "2010-04-21T16:35:41Z")
Eew, unwrapped week-old cake! ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-the-greatest-birthday-clown-or-what/536829/8 "2010-04-21T16:52:04Z")
Oh, those wacky Swiss! Always a barrel of laughs! ---
**Author:** ![pbbth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f9ae1b/32.png) [@pbbth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pbbth)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-the-greatest-birthday-clown-or-what/536829/9 "2010-04-21T16:53:25Z")
Cons: -Stalker Pros: -Brings me cake Hmm…I will have to think about this for a bit before I decide whether it is a good thing or a bad thing. ---
**Author:** ![Digital\_Stimulus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/aeb1de/32.png) [@Digital\_Stimulus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Digital_Stimulus)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-the-greatest-birthday-clown-or-what/536829/10 "2010-04-21T17:52:51Z")
My wife is away on vacation (playing hockey in a breast cancer charity and visiting a friend). It was also her birthday about a week ago. And she _hates_ clowns, especially scary clowns (although she’d say that _all_ clowns are scary and that it’s just a matter of degree). I sent her an email a few days ago – Subject: **Birthday Present!** that linked to this story. Heh. Her email reply was rather terse (and rather profane). I found out later that she opened the link while in the hotel room with her teammates, saw it and screamed: _MOTHERFUCKER THAT ASSHOLE HUSBAND OF MINE GODDAMN!!_. I’ll ask y’all, just as I asked her: Am I a bad person just because every time I think about it, I giggle? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![MovieMogul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f08c70/32.png) [@MovieMogul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MovieMogul)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-the-greatest-birthday-clown-or-what/536829/11 "2010-04-21T17:59:22Z")
> [@GuanoLad](#): > > But I would expect the majority of kids to have nightmares every night for the entirety of their lives. Let’s be honest–that is a small price to pay. Can’t wait to see the first YouTube of him in action! ---
**Author:** ![Edward\_The\_Head](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ce73a5/32.png) [@Edward\_The\_Head](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Edward_The_Head)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-the-greatest-birthday-clown-or-what/536829/12 "2010-04-21T18:22:27Z")
> [@pbbth](#): > > Hmm…I will have to think about this for a bit before I decide whether it is a good thing or a bad thing. When’s your birthday again? And what’s your phone number and address. I have some… um, flowers to send you. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-the-greatest-birthday-clown-or-what/536829/13 "2010-04-21T19:04:27Z")
I thought it was a great idea! But then I was also assuming you would _TELL_ the child what you were doing. I can just see the Celtling, giggling and screaming with her friends as “her” scary clown peeps around the corner at her during recess. I mean, if the deal is they evade, or they get a cake, then it’s kinda like laser tag, isn’t? Wouldn’t the kid have to know? I might ask him to use a less creepy mask though. But, yeah, jail cell. Even if I called ahead and warned the school, I just don’t see it turning out well. Didn’t anyone here play “assassin” in school? We used pea shooter with mung beans in them. . . ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-the-greatest-birthday-clown-or-what/536829/14 "2010-04-21T19:46:22Z")
Of course you tell. I think I would like the challenge. It’s kind of like Man Tracker but on a smaller scale and less bugs. ---
**Author:** ![raventhief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/raventhief/32/4_2.png) [@raventhief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raventhief)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2010, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-the-greatest-birthday-clown-or-what/536829/15 "2010-04-22T01:34:31Z")
This is AWESOME. I feel happy just knowing this service is available somewhere in the world. Well done, clown! And if I ever win the lottery, I will send someone to switzerland just so I can hire this clown. ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Tyger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/fbc32d/32.png) [@Silver\_Tyger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Tyger)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2010, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-the-greatest-birthday-clown-or-what/536829/16 "2010-04-22T01:50:56Z")
I can’t decide if that’s awesome or fucking terrifying. I suppose it would depend on the kid. Of course, with some kids, he’d end up with a broken arm. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2010, 4:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-the-greatest-birthday-clown-or-what/536829/17 "2010-04-22T04:00:08Z")
Heeeeeeeey kids!