# Is this.. wrong? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 18, 2002, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-wrong/98877 "2002-03-18T15:26:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2002, 8:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-wrong/98877/21 "2002-03-19T08:25:27Z")
It wouldn’t make you feel any better… ---
**Author:** ![tesseract](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bb73d2/32.png) [@tesseract](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tesseract)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2002, 10:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-wrong/98877/22 "2002-03-19T10:54:21Z")
> [@](#): > > _originally posted by gatopescado:_ > **if someone contacts them for a reference, the only thing they can legally do is confirm employment dates and rehire status, or they open themselves up to a major ass-reaming.** > [@](#): > > _originally posted by bordelond:_ > **In practice, at least in the U.S. (AFAIK), gatopescado is correct – it is more or less against the law for a past employer to make disparaging comments about you to a potential future employer.** > [@](#): > > _originally posted by Duke:_ > **Now, it’s technically true what gatopescado said about references…** Don’t you hate it when that pesky first amendment gets in the way of a perfectly good bit of so-oft-repeated-it-must-be-true-urban-legendary-legal-knowledge? It’s not illegal to make true disparaging comments about a former employee. In this country, very few things are illegal TO SAY. If the comments are true, a slander or libel case would fail, as truth is generally a great defense against a slander/libel claim. Even if a disparaging reference turned out to be false, there are many state laws that protect from a defamation lawsuit employers who have given such a reference in good faith. I believe the misconception stems from the fact that in order to avoid any risk of a lawsuit whatsoever, many employers have made it a practice not to give out any more information than confirmation of employment and hire/termination dates. It is certainly not illegal to provide detailed, disparaging, references, and bobkitty’s employer would have every right to tell a prospective employer exactly what she did. ---
**Author:** ![Mondeo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e57/32.png) [@Mondeo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mondeo)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2002, 10:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-wrong/98877/23 "2002-03-19T10:56:57Z")
Despite what I said earlier, you **would** feel better! ---
**Author:** ![Yondan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/278dde/32.png) [@Yondan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yondan)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2002, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-wrong/98877/24 "2002-03-19T15:41:15Z")
Well, even though the issue seems settled, I would like to share a bit of wisdom from the Tao: Treat well those who are good to you. Treat well also those who are not. Thus is goodness attained. You’re a good person, **BK** , and already know the answer to your question. ---
**Author:** ![Cazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cazzle/32/75_2.png) [@Cazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cazzle)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2002, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-wrong/98877/25 "2002-03-19T15:51:56Z")
Well, I had a friend who, as a parting gesture, changed the desktop image to a cartoon that said “If Assholes Could Fly, This Place Would Be An Airport”. As a result she was refused a reference, leaving quite a hole in her already patchy work history. Sometimes it’s not a good idea to burn your bridges, even after you’ve crossed them. Take the high road. ---
**Author:** ![Wonko\_The\_Sane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/258eb7/32.png) [@Wonko\_The\_Sane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wonko_The_Sane)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2002, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-wrong/98877/26 "2002-03-20T15:54:59Z")
Rename the files and shortcuts to a sequential numbering system. Write down the descriptions of the files on a piece of paper, and memorize it if needed (the location of the shortcuts on your desktop and the icon types may be all you need). Then shred the paper the day you quit. Charge 48.00 an hour with a 7 hour minimum as a consultant after you quit. The membership list? Hmmm. 65.doc I think. Actually, you are better off just deciding which day to quit, and to walk out at a critical moment. ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_Wright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@Steve\_Wright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_Wright)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2002, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-wrong/98877/27 "2002-03-20T16:13:30Z")
A few months ago, I acquired a second manager (all his team quit, so he became second banana to my crazed Australian boss). According to this guy’s most recent grumblings, just before they all quit, his team members took a look at all the work-related email lists they were subscribed to. Realizing, of course, that the information in these lists was _vital_ to the running of the company, they made sure it wouldn’t be lost, by… signing their soon-to-be-ex-manager up for all of them. He’s still moaning about the amount of spam that clutters up his inbox. Is _your_ boss receiving all the important (work-related) information she needs? Just a thought. ---
**Author:** ![Abe\_Babe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3ab097/32.png) [@Abe\_Babe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Abe_Babe)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2002, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-wrong/98877/28 "2002-03-20T16:36:48Z")
Taping a sardine to the back of your bosses’ file cabinet just before you all leave for the weekend will leave a nice parting gift. Worked wonders in college. ---
**Author:** ![Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9de053/32.png) [@Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackknifed_Juggernaut)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2002, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-wrong/98877/29 "2002-03-20T17:14:50Z")
Yes, it’s wrong. Ethically, spiritually, or any way you want to look at it, it’s wrong. You were being paid to perform work for a corporation. By destroying this work, you are stealing. But here’s something that might be of help to you: Go to HER superior and explain the problem. Be sure to remind that person of your stellar reviews until you-know-who took over. Chances are that you’ll still lose your job. But the last thing that a manager wants is a wrongful termination lawsuit. And personality conflicts should not harm your chances of getting another job. So negotiate a good reference at the very least. Who knows, the superior may even assist you in finding something new. So it would be unethical to destroy the work that you’ve done on behalf of the company. But it would be stupid to walk away quietly, especially if you’ve done nothing wrong. ---
**Author:** ![Morgainelf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Morgainelf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgainelf)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2002, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-wrong/98877/30 "2002-03-20T17:40:54Z")
Hi **bobkitty**. Sorry you’re having to deal with this. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by bordelond \* > > In practice, at least in the U.S. (AFAIK), **gatopescado** is correct – it is more or less against the law for a past employer to make disparaging comments about you to a potential future employer. When a business checks a reference, they normally _only_ ask if a employment candidate actually worked there at the times listed on the resume or application. They can also ask “Is this person eligible for re-hire.” If you pull the stunt you’re thinking about pulling, the answer will likely be “no.” Chances are, because you’re going to be let go the answer will be no anyway, but you should find out in the meeting when they ask you to leave or you resign. Also find out what your nasty manager’s policy is for referrals. Though the law is on your side, the reality is that many smaller employers don’t follow that particular law. No way to find out but ask. Or, you could call her after you leave pretending to be a potential employer, and find out first hand what she’ll really say if allowed to give you a reference. Good Luck. Oh, and if you’re looking for commiseration, here’s a recent [pit thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=104073). ---
**Author:** ![Morgainelf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Morgainelf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgainelf)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2002, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-wrong/98877/31 "2002-03-20T17:47:20Z")
Ah, that’s what I get for not reading the rest of the thread… ---
**Author:** ![KevinLeeC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b19c9b/32.png) [@KevinLeeC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KevinLeeC)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2002, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-wrong/98877/32 "2002-03-20T19:10:16Z")
Sometimes typos turn in up databases…key addresses, the names of prime donors… 😉 Ah, whaddamI saying? I wouldn’t have the courage, so I can’t ask you to either. Besides, it’s not right. Pleasant thought, though. ---
**Author:** ![LindyHopper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ebca7d/32.png) [@LindyHopper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LindyHopper)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2002, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-wrong/98877/33 "2002-03-21T00:41:18Z")
The main problem (as I see it) with doing something like this is that results won’t be your boss’s problem. At least, she won’t let it be her problem for long. She’ll foist it off on someone else, and then it will have created a problem for someone you didn’t intend to inconvenience. What, you think _she’s_ going to re-enter all those names and stuff herself? No, some poor flunky will get it in the neck. I know, I know, you already said you wouldn’t do it, but I just got around to reading the thread. 😉 Besides, you’re too good a person. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2002, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-wrong/98877/34 "2002-03-21T15:22:08Z")
I agree completely with \*\*Jackknifed Juggernaut[b/]. If you do petty or illegal stunts, then it can spoil your reputation. However, if you point things out politely to higher management, they should be able to sort your boss out. Why do they want to have a bad manager? ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2002, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-wrong/98877/35 "2002-03-21T15:23:26Z")
**Jackknifed Juggernaut** it’s the last week of term - I’m going to bed! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-this-wrong/98877.md?page=1)