# Is touching co-workers OK?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-touching-co-workers-ok/833424>\
**Category:** Great Debates\
**Created:** [May 3, 2019, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-touching-co-workers-ok/833424 "2019-05-03T15:42:12Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 1\
**Showing post:** 111

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**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\
**Post date:** [May 4, 2019, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/is-touching-co-workers-ok/833424/111 "2019-05-04T00:44:21Z")

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> [@Esprise\_Me](#):
>
> I’m curious about those who feel strongly that a woman (or anyone being touched at work in a way that makes them uncomfortable) should confront the toucher first before going to HR. Surely if the touching in question were so obviously benign that the parties could have worked it out themselves, HR will take that into consideration instead of just firing the guy. Unless of course there’s a history, because he makes a habit of touching the new girl in a way that makes her uncomfortable, but that isn’t overtly sexual, so he has some plausible deniability… If everyone reports everything, HR will know whether this is one guy bothering a bunch of women who all get along fine with all the other men, or one woman who complains a lot about everyone, or some other dynamic. But if the new girls never report the touchy dude because they don’t want to make waves their first week on the job, he could get away with doing this to a lot of women by just moving on to the next one as soon as his current victim gets ready to stand up for herself.

\*\*Because HR is not your friend. \*\*

It will go down as a black mark for him, and\* you \*the reportee. It, even tho perfectly innocent and one time, could cost him (and you) a promotion.

Let me make this clear, we’re talking about a light shoulder touch, a wrist or hand touch, not a pussy or ass grab. Absolutely anything sexual or out of line should be reported. But many people have no issue at all with being lightly touched in a innocent and non-sexual manner, and in fact they appreciate it.

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