So, if Rue said he didn’t want to be on a deserted desert island, would we know that he didn’t want to be on an unpopulated island with an arid climate, or would he just be being repetitive?
And if Rue or any of us were stuck on an unpopulated island with an arid climate, could we still have dessert?
Poly, I don’t know how to thank you for that update. But the leather things? They still go in the horse’s mouth so you can steer, right? (At least you didn’t pretend to sit on that tidbit for the better part of a week. For that, (among many things) I respect you.)
Another good island would be Maura Tierney Island. (She was just on TV last night (that I saw) and so I thought I’d say. It was the movie Instinct with Cuba (also an island) Gooding, Jr. Man! How did he win an Oscar? Anthony Hopkins acted rings around him and Tony didn’t say a word for the first half hour. Maura was better too.) Maura Island is most likely near Scantily Clad Wimmins Island. (At least in my mind.) There are rumours that S.C.W. Island is near the American side of Beer Island, but there have been no confirmed sightings.
-Rue. (charting the uncharted waves)
I want to go the the Dessert Island populated by Scantily Clad Men Who Love Women Who Eat Too Much Dessert, i.e. the SCMWLWWETMD Island. This island is connected to the Breakfast in Bed with formerly Scantily Clad Man Island. And also Library Island, because woman does live by dessert alone.
Well, I’m glad we’re moving on to Scantily Clad Man Island because frankly Bacon Bushes and Porkie Products Island were starting to make me ralph. swampy will no doubt join us there, Kallessa! The rest of the vegetarians can move over to the dessert part of the island with me, where we will eat the normal things that plants grow, unlike the things calm kiwi imagines!
Kiwis! Yum! Did you know that kiwis are actually Chinese gooseberries, but they changed the name for marketing reasons, figuring most people would rather eat something called kiwi than a big giant furry brown berry from China.
-Ellen. (not ralphing)
I live on a small island.
It’s far from deserted though. Bloody tourists traipsing around like they own the place. Trying to walk into my house thinking it’s a tourist attraction. Littering the place up and peeing in the bushes. Day I get a boat that damned bridge is so getting blown up.
Islands in the stream
That is what we are
No one in between
How can we be wrong
Sail away with me
To another world
And we rely on each other , ah ha
From one lover to another , ah ha
Well, someone had to do it!
Oh, I could go for a breakfast island (served by scantily clad men, why not?). But it’d definitely have to have a grits well. The good, stone-ground ones too. But not with any stone actually in them.
And I think LurkMeister has an excellent point with the mimosas. We’d need a champagne spring for that, right next to the orange juice river for convenience.
I also have got to have a pepper vine and a salt mine.
Or a salt lick. I’m not that picky.
Well, if the Scantily Clad Men got all hot and sweaty . . .
mmmmmmm Scantily Clad Salt Lick mmmmmmmmm.
No, that’s not quite true Kallie. No one really had to do it, but you did it anyway. That makes it extra special.
If… when you do blow up the bridge, don’t do it on a Monday, OK Iteki? At least don’t tell us about it until Tuesday. I’d hate to be eclipsed.
-Rue. (tetchy)
I volunteer to be the leader of the scantily clad men on SCMWLWWETMD Island, as long as I get paid in… something.
The island next the island I grew up on (Port Royal Island) is called Lady’s Island. I never did meet her.
I would want an island with up and down to it, not all one surface.
Caves, grottos, reefs, a volcano with lava tubes… places for little creatures to hide and be discovered in.
Consider yourself scantily clad.
Better yet, let me consider you scantily clad!
Hmmmmm scantily clad men Isalnd does sound better then Piggie-Product Island (well depending on which men are cantily clad of course). I’d love to be a vegeterian really I would but bacon is just too yum. Though given the choice between piddie products and scantily clad men I vegeterian all the way.
And in my continuing programme of educating Yanks I would just like to point out to Ellen Cherry if you are eating kiwis you are not a vegeterian. Kiwis are people or birds, neither of which are edible or yummy (ok the birds could be edible but that would be sacraligous!). Kiwfruit however are delish, and called kiwifruit cause no one else was clever enough to sell ugly fruit to the world
Kiwi (not ralphing at the thought of Ellen eating our national bird or dining on my fellow citizens)
OOPs now I see why rereading ones post before posting is a good thing. Piddle products sounds a wee bit yuck 
(and yes I know there were lots more typos I’m just not acknowledging them)
I thought the typos were from you getting just a little too excited about Scantily Clad Men Island kiwi.
You know Bill, if you put your pants on once in a while, the Lady of the Island might have come out from hiding behind the hedges muttering about “that Bill boy”. That’s the trick to meeting Ladies, keep your pants on. Once you’ve met them though…
-Rue. (with pants at the moment)
Guess what, Calm Kiwi, they actually have a fruit called the Ugli fruit! It really isn’t that ugly!
Yup all those produce tests finally have a real world use. Ok all the years I managed to remember my fruits and veggies and be a nice and efficient cashier was a real world use too but I’ve still retained a little trivia from then just for fun!
How close is this Scantily Clad Men Island to Dessert Island? Oh, and do they have high-speed net access?
Rue - what kind of pants? Are they kinda tattered like every shipwrecked man has to wear? Are you wearing a shirt too? How about a beard - do you have a little stubbly growth? Um, no reason - just wondering…
Give me a holler and we’ll move Beer Island and Snack Food - Huge Screen TV island together.
It’ll be a little paradise.
Welcome back by the way, I was just going to get on today and find out if you were dead again.
Psh. Must you challenge me?
The Big Rue Desert Island
One evening as the board went down
And the Dopers all were burning,
Along the thread came a Rue-dog posting,
He said, "Boys, I’m not turning
I’m heading for a land that’s far away
After a drink from the water fountain
I’ll see you all this coming fall
On the Big Rue Desert Island
On the Big Rue Desert Island
It’s a land that’s fair and bright,
The pork chops grow on bushes
So you can eat out every night.
The health clubs all are empty
And there’s warm brownies every day
I’m bound to go
Where there’s ice cream snow
Where the wives don’t call
And the beer always flows
On the Big Rue Desert Island.
On the Big Rue Desert Island
Rue never changes his socks
And little streams of daiquiris
Come trickling down candy rocks
O mountains sport baklava mines
And the wimmens are scantily clad
There’s a lake of stew
And of whiskey too
And you can paddle
All around it in a big canoe
On the Big Rue Desert Island
On the Big Rue Desert Island
There’s a library for the geeks
And big brown furry Chinese berries
Grow on the trees all week
The farmer’s trees are full of fruit
And the barns are full of beer
I’m bound to go
Where there’s ice cream snow
Where the wives don’t call
And the beer always flows
On the Big Rue Desert Island.
On the Big Rue Desert Island.
The roofs are made of tin.
And you can listen to the soda pop rain
And look for scantily clad men.
There ain’t no bosses to answer to,
And the Internet always works,
I’m bound to stay
Where you sleep all day,
Where they hung the jerk
That invented work
On the Big Rue Desert Island.
Welby, the effort you went to. I’m touched.
-Rue. (a little teary)
Beautiful. Thanks you.